Hashgachah Pratis in Shidduchim: MeHashem Yatza HaDavar, Tefillah, and Kriyas Yam Suf

Transcript

This Torah class is brought to you by TorahAnytime.com. Jetzt gekt in the parsha, Chayei Sarah, the parsha fun shidduchim. Yitzchak, he's a shidduch. Eliezer, dorshatchin. The shver, first besuel. Besuel is taken away, is Lavan, un Rivka. It's very much be'arichus, the gantze parsha, all the pratim, all the details of the shidduch, v', un vu, un ven, un vos. So much pratim that Chazal already say, Yafes sichasan shel avdei avos yoser miTorasan shel banim. That Chazal already are me'orer that there's so much arichus and detail on every part, on every prat, un ibergechazt, nachamol mit, nachamol, again and again, piz sivelta shidduch. Avade, yafes sichasan shel avdei avos yoser miTorasan shel banim. It's in the Torah to learn from it, to upholen from them. The parsha sheduchim, bichlal, is a shvere sugya. And I don't mean only a shvere sugya because it's difficult to find shidduchim, which of course is also true. Obviously, a shvere sugya, the gisha, how do we approach shidduchim? Say מצד השקפה, say מצד advice, say מצד all the difficulties. There's so much in the parsha of shidduchim, which is a lesson in life. Shidduchim might be the situation. That might be what we're going through when you do a shidduch, but it's actually more deeper. There's a lot more in a shidduch than just the actual shidduch. There's an avodah, avodas hakodesh. It's part of life that one has to grow from. It's difficult for a reason. Chazal tell us, קשה לזווגן כקריעת ים סוף, and, im yirtzeh Hashem, we'll talk different pshatim what it means. But if it's kasha, it means that it's part of life, of nisyonos. Vos midarf durchgein un shteigen, and to grow from it. And of course, we could borrow from the lessons of Shidduch to parnassah. Chazal say that's also one of the things which is kasheh k'kriyas Yam Suf. There is nobody who hasn't touched on shidduchim and the difficulty of shidduchim. Whether it's you yourself, whether it's your children, whether you see your neighbors, see a shidduch. Shidduchim—it's a parsha. In English they call it the shidduchim crisis. I wouldn't like to use the word crisis. The word crisis—not a crisis. Shidduchim is a parsha. It's an opportunity. Vos der Yid darf durchgein. And there are things that in the shidduch, in the getting of the shidduch, that are yesodos hadas vos der Yid darf durchgein. And I'd like to discuss a little bit about...

And like I said, Chazal already compared the nisyones of parnassah to the nisyones of shidduch. They're both kasheh k'kriyas Yam Suf. Let us begin, Rabosai, mit a shaylah. There's a gantze shakla v'tarya, you finen der shidduch fun Yitzchak. I don't understand. Rabosai, Rashi tells us clearly, nisht in ein place, but in two places. Rashi in perek chof-beis, pasuk chaf, in perek chof-hei, pasuk chaf-vav, that when Avraham Avinu finished with the Akeidah, nisbaser shenoldah zivugo shel Yitzchak. And Rashi says clearly, nisbaser shenoldah Rivkah. So what's the shaylah? What's the problem? Shteit doch. Rivkah is born, he was told, when he was in Himmel, he was told, der bas ploni almoni. What more do you want? Unless Rivkah was not miBeis Avio, maybe stam Rivkah. But you see Avraham was makpid zol zayn miBeis Avio, so l'choirah there's a Rivkah in Beis Avio. Nur yeder lach freg, nur lernen pashut pshat, what's the gantze tumult? What's the whole shaylah? Shteit doch klar, nisbaser shenoldah Yitzchak, Rivkah. So what's the whole problem, the whole ... Who is she? What and where? When ... when the isha, the one that comes out to tell me, Hagmini, ... Hagmalei, ... What's, what's? Unless maybe Chazal just said nisbases shenelda. But Rivka is just lashon of Rashi, maybe ... Maybe just nisbases, that her shelich was nelda. There's a very nice Sfas Emes. Sfas Emes says, Choira, the bas Ploni lePloni is arbaim yom kodem. So actually this bas Kel shenisbases Rivka daf zayn yarim far dem. It's a whole machlokes, the Rishonim: was she three at the time? Was she thirteen, twelve, thirteen at the time? Okay, this is daskeinim, Rishonim. But either way, the bas Ploni lePloni, the bas Kel, should have been told to Avraham Avinu. So what's the whole nisbaser shenolda dafka by the akeidah? Zogt the Sfas Emes, pashut, because even though he was a navi and mishtamesh with the ... the bas Kel, but then there wouldn't be a nisayon of the akeidah. Because if he's being told that ... he's going to survive the akeidah, so in order it should be a nisayon of the akeidah, min hamishpachah zogt the bas Kel. Otherwise, he knows that he's going to survive the akeidah. But good, is nach der akeidah. After the akeidah, he knows the bas ploni l'ploni. So what became the ganze shakla v'tarya, the back and forth, and the bedavka finer, rivka d'shidach. Chabeisai, let me tell you what I think the pshat is in the ganze parsha, and in the whole arichus, and in the back and forth. The pasuk says clearly that Lavan, Besuel, they came to a hachlatah, Ki me'Hashem yatza hadavar. Said the Rabbeinu Shleimah, this was the Rabbeinu Shleimah, me'Hashem yatza hadavar. Lo nuchal daber eilecha ra o tov, we can't talk about it, sifun the Rabbeinu Shleimah. Now who said this? Who said? Vataskach? Eliezer? No. Lavan mi'Besuel. Lavan and Besuel, the cholei avodah zarah. We're talking about the worst of the worst of kefirim and resha'im, resha'im arurim, resha'im. Vaneichi panisi habayis, Rashi says clearly the house is מלא גילולים.

Shtelt zach far that they come to the understanding and the realization, that Hashem yotza hadavar. That they understood, bashem yotza hadavar, is a chapelete gezach. You know, rabosai, what needs to come together, what needs to join together, different situations and parts and people, in order to have a shidduch. You know, let's begin even in the shidduch of Eliezer, with the shadchan Eliezer to get Rivka. The shadchan aleinu nisgavaltem shidduch for Yitzchak. Shteit doch klar: Ulai lo seilech ha'ishah leleches acharai, ulai, iz eilai. Imagine you send the shadchan. You know, could you imagine you send the shadchan and the shadchan really wants the shidduch for himself? Shteit, the chatan is a shadchan, to the point that Avraham Avinu has to be mashbiach. He has to make Eliezer swear that he's not going to ruin the shidduch. Nu. Shtam yevelt a gut vort, vegen shadchanim, yeah? Okay, I'll tell you a gut vort about shadchanim. Mizog Chassan daymel a melech. Why is chassan daymel a melech? The shaychus, the kesher. So I think the raketzhava reflects on. Tavat for raketzhava, tachtach. There's three dinim that a melech has: lo yarbeh lo nashim. No. Lemaaseh, a man's tohtashidach. He's a chosson, lo yarbeh lo nashim. That's it. He has one. Lo yarbeh lo kesef. I don't have to explain that. At chasunah, there's bills. What's the lo yarbeh lo susim? No more. You can't have any more horses. The raketzhava's at the gate of the shadchan. Lo yarbeh lo susim. Enough. That's it. You've had patur from the susim. Azoi flekt the raketzhava zog. Tzaveltu, rabosai. But you see that Eliezer was a shadchan, that Avraham Avinu was mesupik if he's even going to do this, if he ... the shidduch, v'lo yilas v'zeh chalei. He wants it for himself. Tell me, did the father of the kallah want the shidduch? You see clearly not. Didn't want. And the Ribbono Shel Olam had to take him away, had kedav shtarbe. Lavan, mitmamet, did they want the shidduch? No. They started drinking a cup, teishev imanu hanaarah, she should stay here. Many Rishonim learn, let Yitzchok come here. Before the shidduch, they were fighting. She live in Be'er Pak, she live in Lakewood. I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding. ... This was the ... Where are you gonna live? Not right away. Teishev imanu hanagar. And then there has to be, the she has to be maskim. And let's say she's three years old. The beis din must make that she should be maskim. If you take a look, it says clearly in the pasuk, nishalah es piha. The Medrash says, nishalah es piha, hateilchi. The loshon hateilchi is lo teilech. They were trying to put into her mind and into her mouth, lo teilech, you shouldn't go. Geinisht. So you know how many things have to come together? Eliezer, the shadchan, the sul, the tat, love and the bruder, the meidel alein, yat a maaseh. And in every shidduch it's that way. In every shidduch, there's so many things have to be able to come into place in order it should happen. MeHashem yatza davar. It's clear by shidduchim, as noder the Ribono Shel Olam firt shidduch. Things that you can never imagine would be put together come together. That's meHashem yatza davar. We find something interesting, tak in the parsha. Avraham Avinu sends Eliezer, hu yishlach...

Malachei lefanecha. Tenz a malach. What's this malach? What is hu yishlach malachei lefanecha? So pashut, you could say the malachim of the derech, the trip, right? Lishmorcha baderech. Maybe it's for shmirah. Pasuk doesn't say it was about shmirah. It's about hatzlachah. It says clearly it's about hatzlachah. Zogt the pasuk, oh, Hashem Elokei hashamayim, asher lekachani mi'beis avi, hu yishlach malacho lefanecha. So it's not about shmirah baderech. It was duch firen dem shidduch. What's the malach? What is it? Who is malach? There's an interesting perek to Eliezer. At the end of the parsha, Eliezer says, Don't hold me back. Hashem hitzliach darki. I want to go back. Who's he talking to? Pashut talking to Lavan and Besuel. The perek to Eliezer says clearly he was talking to the malach. The malach was waiting outside. There was a malach waiting. Al tachreini, don't be me'acheni, let's go. Mashma it has to do with the derech, but that's not the pashut pshat in the pasuk. Who is malach? There's a very interesting Ramban. The Ramban says— וַיַּשְׁבִּעֲךָ בְּלִקֵּה הַשָּׁמַיִם וְלִקֵּה הָאָרֶץ. What’s a לִקֵּה הַשָּׁמַיִם וְלִקֵּה הָאָרֶץ? Says Rashi, that when he was לְכַחָנִי מִבֵּית אָבִי, he was just a לִקֵּה הַשָּׁם. Nu, you know, you know, Rashi, famous Rashi. He was only a לִקֵּה הַשָּׁמַיִם. But now he’s also לִקֵּה הָאָרֶץ. What’s a לִקֵּה הָאָרֶץ? Because הִתְגַּלְתִּי בְּפִי הַבְּרִיּוֹת. Now the people know who he is. Why is that important here in this, in the parashah of the shidduch? What’s the negeiah? Why is the lesson that he’ll galtiv, that now you know that he’s a לִקֵּה הָאָרֶץ, why here? Why was it important as a message to Eliezer, as a vort, שֶׁהִתְגַּלְתִּי בְּפִי הַבְּרִיּוֹת? It’s a difference. Nu, רבקה. It’s important וַיַּשְׁבִּעֲךָ in the shvua, בַּה׳ אֱלֹקֵי הַשָּׁמַיִם וֵאלֹקֵי הָאָרֶץ. There’s a Ramban that says, אֱלֹקֵי הָאָרֶץ — סוֹד גָּדוֹל יֵשׁ בָּזֶה. There’s a big סוֹד here, סוֹד, רַבַּתִּי, a סוֹד. What’s the סוֹד? So he sends you to Vayikra, and he says in Parashas Vayikra over there, I explain what the סוֹד גָּדוֹל is. If you look over there, the Ramban explains that there’s such a thing called אֱלֹקֵי הַשָּׁמַיִם, and there’s such a thing called אֱלֹקֵי הָאָרֶץ. What is אֱלֹקֵי הָאָרֶץ? The goyim don't have a Lekei Haaretz. They're tachas, mazel. But Lekei Haaretz, Klal Yisrael, they have hashgacha pratis. The Ramban on the pasuk, that when Moshe Rabbeinu tells that, that the Ribbono Shel Olam, Vayishlach malach lefanem, the Ribbono Shel Olam sent a malach to take them out of Mitzrayim. Hamalach hagoel osi mikol ra, who is that malach? What's hamalach hagoel? Could you imagine, you get the bracha, hamalach hagoel osi mikol ra? The Ribbono Shel Olam, what's malach? Malach's from the Ribbono Shel Olam. Imagine, give a bracha, hamalach hagoel osi mikol ra, hu yevarech es hanaarim. It should say, the Ribbono Shel Olam should give you a bracha. If you look at the Ramban, the Ramban says, who is the malach? It's the Eibishter. But it's fadekt. When it's covered in nature, it's called malach, malochoi.

Hamalach hagoel osi mikol ra. The malach means that Yaakov Avinu feels that every step of the way that he went, there was hashgacha pratis. Hamalach hagoel osi mikol ra. What's mikol ra? You know, a person could walk in the street. He doesn't even know half of the things that could be awaiting him as a problem, as a stumbling block. The Ribbono Shel Olam, hashgacha pratis. He's watching and He's protecting. Elokei haaretz. Look at the Ramban. The Ramban says Elokei haaretz means that the Ribbono Shel Olam feels, and He's watching and He protects. And that's for Klal Yisroel miyuchid. Hamalach hagoel osi mikol ra, from all the bad. I don't even know half the bad things that could happen. A person walks, does he know what the ...? Hamalach. What's that malach? That's hashgacha pratis. Malacho is the hashgacha pratis of the Eibishter. It's covered. It comes in a form of malach, but it's hashgacha pratis. Hu yishlach malacho lefanecha. And the pshat, rabosai, is because the greatest form of hashgacha pratis is a shidduchim. Shidduchim, rabosai, is a Yid davuk ein un zen hashgacha. And like we explained, that the Parnos is the same thing. They're both in the same Chazalin of kasher l'zavka k'kriyas Yam Suf. Hashgacha pratis. Elokei haaretz. Why is Shidduchim k'kriyas Yam Suf? What is it in Kriyas Yam Suf? And the teretz is, there's such a thing called teva. There's nature. The nature of the ocean is not to split. Then as the Ribono Shel Olam, with His hashgacha pratis, comes and says, Split, and it splits. Against the greatest of forces of nature, against the greatest forces of nature, the Yam Suf splits, the shidduch happens, the mezaynes shel adam happen. Do you understand what has to come together? The cheshbonos d'Rachmana, the chushbonos d'Rachmana, all the things that poof have to come together in order for a shidduch to happen, in order for a person to have his mezaynes. Avadeh, people think that the shidduch, the yesod of the shidduch is the result, to get the shidduch. It's probably true also. But there's a lot more in shidduchim than just getting the shidduch. It's lessons in life, chabeisai. It's shteiging in avodah of zein a Yid. What does it mean to go through? What does it mean to live in this world? It's to understand. It's to be misboinen and realize the chasdei Hashem. Just like a person says shira after a Kriyas Yam Suf, he needs to say shira after a shidduch. We're still going to learn this. There's a peledike, peledike. Rabbeinu Bechaye in Parshas Tzav. Rabbeinu Bechaye says that the arba tzrichin l'hodos. You have to bring a korban todah. Nichlal in the parsha of arba tzrichin l'hodos is choson when he makes a shidduch. He brings a korban todah. Habeisai, a chiddush lahalacha, a shvere, shvere.

A very difficult Rabbeinu Bechaya. Where did Rabbeinu Bechaya get it from? Arba tzrichim l'hodos. They have to bring a korban todah. Chassimus has to bring a korban todah. Where did he get korban todah? I want to tell you something interesting. The Gemara says, Kol hamesameach choson v'kallah, nu, the Gemara brachos, k'ilu hikriv todah. Right, the todah. Why korban todah? What happened? Why korban todah? Ela mai? You come and say, of everything you have to bring a korban todah. It's not what it says there. Every time something good happens, you have to bring a korban todah? You could bring. I'm chayiv to bring. ... I break that korban todah? Who said? And why is it kol hamesameach? If you mesameach the choson, it's k'ilu hikriv todah. Havei say, let's talk a little bit about ... aminut kaleh, aminut kaleh ... We find that Eliezer was mispallel. He davened, Hayomer, Hashem Elokei Avraham, hakrei na lefanai hayom, v'hidamti l'rebbeinish le'olam. Tefillah. He also gave like a siman. The naarah that comes and tells me. You know what the Gemara calls that siman? What does the Gemara call that siman? Nichush. Menachesh. You know, a person is not allowed to have omens — a black cat, mita dos, mita yens. The Gemara says clearly, Eliezer did that. Kol menachesh k'Eliezer. Eliezer was the quintessential, the example of nichush. The Rambam in Hilchos Avodah Zarah, perek aleph, halacha hei, says that Eliezer was taka over the issur of lo senachesh. Famous Rambam. The Gemara says, you did nichush. The Raavad says, chas v'shalom, chas v'shalom, Eliezer. Eliezer, when he found the shidduch of Yitzchak, was through an aveirah of nichush, that the girl is a tzadikah, you tochin. Can't be something. The Rishonim muchin zich: so why is it nichush? Why is it not nichush? There's a Tosafos over there. The Tosafos says he didn't really rely on it; it was just a siman b'alma. The Eitz Yosef on Medrash says, chas v'shalom, that he relied on the nichush. He was mispallel; he relied on the tefillah. The nichush was just a siman b'alma. If you take a look at the Sippurna, the Sippurna zugt klar that the actual nichush was part of the tefillah; it's a chelek of the tefillah. Nichush is a chelek of the tefillah. What does it mean that the nichush, the siman, was a chelek? It says yadua from the Brisker Rav that with all the tefillos and with all the nichushim, aval l'maaseh, it was on top of the mabels, so she's a baalas chesed. So all this was just a check to make sure she's a baalas chesed. It took nisht kein shidduchim because of omens. I remember years ago, somebody came to me, and she said that she's getting married, she's getting engaged. So I asked her, What do you like about the boy? So she says to me, I went and I made the gematriyos of my name and his name, and it fits. And I go, Oy vey. I said, Do me a favor, I'm begging you. If this is the first thing you're telling me why you're marrying this guy, please don't get married to this guy. Bete rachamim. Don't get married to this guy. And she listened, and I was right that it had no shaychus. If that's the best you could do is the good sign that you had from Shamayim, so what's the sign?

The nichush over here. And the Torah says, the Brisker Rav says, it's not really a nichush. It's just to see if she's a baalas middos, if she'll give to drink. But from the Gemara is mashma, she gave in a nichush; it was a sign from Shamayim. Rebbeinu Shalom, show me a sign. And according to the Rambam, she was over the issur lo senachesh. There's a Radak in Shmuel. Radak says, mizol visen, that this that she came with a siman, it wasn't that that was the shidduch because of the siman. No. He was mispalel to the Eibishter that the Eibishter should show him that his tefillah was miskabel. So the nichush was not about— the nichush was not about the actual shidduch. The ikar is given the tefillah. The main thing was the davening, at gebeten the Rebbeinu Sholelam, show me a sign that You mekabel my tefillah, says the Radak. You know, rabosai, I want to tell you over two pshat. Why is a zivug k'kriyas Yam Suf? So there's a sefer called Asarah Lemeah. It's from the Tatte of Rabbeinu MiPashischa. It's a Tatte of Rabbeinu MiPashischa. In the first drasha, he discusses this Chazal: Why is it k'kriyas Yam Suf? Sakra bonim mipashis, statte, that you see by Kriyas Yam Suf that there was an inyan of tefillah, Vayitzaku Bnei Yisrael el Hashem. First they had to scream out to the Eibishter. And then the Eibishter said, Go, because shiduchim need tefillah. Yesod of a shidduch needs to come dafka through tefillah. And he brings a Gemara. The Gemara says, Azoi yispalel kol chasid leeis matzoi. What's leeis matzoi? Leeis matzoi zu isha. It needs tefillah. Reb Leible Eiger in Teiras Emes says a different pshat. It's not the tefillah, it's the Veha'aminu baHashem uveMoshe avdo, it's the emunah chelek. You need to have emunah. You're jumping into a water. You know how much emunah it takes? Nachshon ben Aminadav. Remember once, I'm mashgiach, I told, you see by shidduchim dafka min haRaim, vaRaim shpringen in shidduch. Don't think and just jump in. You see clearly, Nachshon ben Aminadav, by Kriyas Yam Suf. I went over to my sefer here, but you're missing one hakdamah: Vaya'aminu baHashem, Vaya'aminu ha'am. Hasmahat emunah. It's not maRaim shpringen in shidduch, it's not the answer. It needs emunah, and azoi zogt Reb Leible Eiger. What do I want with all this? Eliezer was mispallel. Did he know it's Rivka? I'm guaranteed, batuach, they knew Rivka was the shidduch. Chazal tell it to us, and Chazal is emes, rabosai. If Chazal זאגן, if Chazal tell us nisbaser shenilda Rivka, they knew it was Rivka. You can't run away from the Chazal. Chazal say clearly that they knew who it was. Ulay lo sover ha'ish laleches acharai. They obviously knew who they were going, didn't they? The resume came in, not from the shadchan, but from the Eibishter alein. The Eibishter alein, it gives the ... that's the shidduch. So what's the whole thing, Vayeishb ... Eliezer, and hu yishlach malacho lefanecha, v'haseh im adoni chesed v'emes, and Eliezer's mispallel. What is all of it? I don't get it. The shidduch ... what the shidduch is.

Eretz chapei sayis, afila az meveis, and afila az mimeitas b'veis. It needs to go through with emunah and bitachon in the hands of the Eibishter. Gotta leave it in the hands of the Ribono Shel Olam. It's clear. Avraham Avinu wants, az iz olgein, Hu yishlach malacho lefanecha. Hashem Elokei hashamayim v'Elokei haaretz. It has to be with an understanding, Ribono Shel Olam, do for. To the point that Lavan and Besuel alein zogin, me'Hashem yatza hadavar. Yatza. We did nothing. We did nothing. Mit gornisht geton. Me'Hashem yatza hadavar. Ribono Shel Olam. An oved avodah zarah was makir. It's all in the hands. It's all from the Ribono Shel Olam alein. Heib ich פון Brisker Rav: Vos iz der chiyuv השתדלות in a shidduch? What, how much is it? What are you doing hishtadlus in a shidduch? Says the Brisker Rav, the hishtadlus in a shidduch is nothing. Normally, u'verachticha... by a shidduch, it's not the hishtadlus at all. I am davka machen hishtadlus far a shidduch? To calm the nerves, just to make a person shouldn't be... should sit home. A little bit he should feel like he's doing something. The calmness. Azoi fligt der Brisker Rav zogn. What does he mean? What did the Brisker Rav make mean? Yidden, life situations are going to teach you, MeHashem yatza hadavar. ... Min meint mitut, mitracht, mitut, mit azei, mitut a her, mitut a... It's not nege anything. Eibishter. There's a meyredige svara emes. Why did he need to do... Why did Avraham Avinu have to do hishtadlus? Don't forget, he didn't do hishtadlus. He sent the bringer. That's hishtadlus, no? Well, she was supposed to fly with wings. How was he supposed to get there? Someone had to bring her. The Imrei Emes says here, in Sfas Emes, Lo yinuchal la'asos davar ki meHashem yatza hadavar. What's lo yinuchal? We can't. So the Sfas Emes, it's not that we didn't try. Believe me, we tried. Just couldn't. We didn't succeed. And the shidduch is the shidduch. Can springing of a dach, can shrayen chai v'kayam. It's going to happen. MeHashem yatza hadavar. That's what it is. I want to tell you something interesting. There's a meyredike medrash. The medrash says, Meheichan yatza? From where did it come from? Hashem yatza hadavar. Meheicha yatza? Where did it come from? Zogt the Medrash, mehar hamoiria. It came from the Akeidah. What does the Akeidah have to do? My base, what does the Akeidah have to do? Meheichan yatza? The shidduch came from the Akeidah? What is the shidduch coming from the Akeidah? What does it mean? Avraham Avinu goes to the Akeidah. What was he thinking? Yitzchak's children. Ribono Shel Olam promised him children, and the teretz is, Ribono Shel Olam zogt tachtonisht, yeah? Right after the Akeidah, you know what kind of a chosson he had? What was the chosson that he had? What was the bachur that he had? He was an oleh temimah. He wasn't allowed to leave Eretz Yisrael. He was a kadosh, the Rebiske Rav calls it. He was a karban mechayim. Could you tell me who would want to marry him? Who would want to marry that? The Malbim says clearly, Rivka never spoke to Yitzchak. Period. Throughout the—

of their marriage. Pachad Yitzchak. And the raya he says is, she wanted the bracha should go to Yankev. Talk, talk it over with Yitzchak. Sit down by the table and have a discussion. Yitzchak, tayere man, this is not the person who you should give the brachas to. You should give the brachas to Yankev. Says the Malbim, she never spoke to Yitzchak. She was afraid of Pachad Yitzchak. You have da naiseh? You have da naiseh? Let me just add, aflu a fella. Nishales pi. You know what? Yida lachlel mit mir. Kum, lernen the parsha together. It's a beautiful parsha. Could you imagine going to ... Rivka lecha bashidech fadich? There is this ... the man ... he's never going to talk to you. He's an oyleh temimah, yeah. He's sitting in his daled amos, in his room, with the Ribono Shel Olam. No, you're interested? This whole thought? There's not a chance. Are you kidding? Why would you want to go? You got to be crazy to go. Let me tell you one more shtikel ... I told you over that there's a din of a kavod ... by a chosson and a kallah. Choshev brings a korban todah. Why does he bring a korban todah? Sagt er me'emes, meheredik. Yibal kasher l'zivugin k'kriyas Yam Suf. Nu, one of the people that bring a korban todah is what? Nu, yahrdei hayom. Yahrdei hayom daniyos. Meileh brengt men a korban todah. Shmack, huh? Aber vos meint dos? What does it mean? What does it mean? Okay, I see the time up there. You're gonna get a maaseh sheh, pili ploy, pili ploy, and then it'll all come back to you and you'll understand vas ich vil do. Reb Yosef Fund from Westgate told me that he heard from Rav Teisig, whose father, Rav Teisig, was a maggid shiur in Bnei Brak, choshuve talmid chacham, who was involved with the shidduch of Reb Chaim Kanievsky. Now listen to a maaseh, and let's see shidduchim. On the up level with shidduchim. Reb Chaim was 24 years old and still couldn't find a shidduch. Reb Chaim was 24 years old and still could not find a shidduch. Huh? Who'd want to marry Yitzchak Avinu? Reb Chaim. The Chitzaynius, he sat all day, learned. He was a little bit heavyish, had a long, thick red beard, and he didn't talk. The Chazon Ish sent Rav Teisig to Yerushalayim to speak with a family that the father was an avardika. And he figured that the daughter from an avardika shtub shall appreciate Reb Chaim. Reb Chaim went to the house for a farher. The daughter ferhered Reb Chaim, and he asked him on a Tosafos. So Reb Chaim said the kasha, Tosafos, and he explained it. Then when it came to the teretz, he said, Ich veis a pshat in the teretz from Tosafos. I don't know. Now understand Reb Chaim. When he said he doesn't know, what did he mean he doesn't know? He doesn't know because he has a kashas, and all the rishonim, he still doesn't have a mahalach in the Tosafos's teretz. So the wife of this navardiker screamed from the kitchen, Azelche shidduchim redt men mir? Vos, aveis afilu nisht kein Tosafos? I will never let my daughter get married to such a guy. Never.

Reb Chaim couldn't shlozen b'shum oifen nisht. Reb Chaim heard it. Heilige Reb Chaim, he left. This is eid mi pi eid, straight. Iz er gegangen tzu Rikn bnei Brak. Do you know how many days later he got engaged to Reb Elyashiv's daughter? Within two weeks. Within two weeks of this story, he got engaged. During the going of the shidduch, Rebbetzin Kanievsky, aleha hashalom, didn't want the shidduch. Avtosik says over, didn't want the shidduch. So she went to Reb Elyashiv. Her father, she says, I don't want the shidduch. Things bother me. She says, Go to the Chazon Ish. Go to the Chazon Ish. He's the uncle. He's honest. He'll tell you the truth. So she went to the Chazon Ish. The Chazon Ish asked her, Is it the chitzoniyus that bother you? Because if it's that, I understand. I understand. She said, It's not the chitzoniyus. It's the pnimiyus. He doesn't talk. Heilige Reb Chaim doesn't talk. The Chazon Ish said, I'm telling you, ich kumen a tog that you're going to stand in line to talk to him. And they're even going to break down the doors to talk to him. Rebbetzin Kanievsky used to say over. She told the Rav Taisi, how many times we had to fix the doors. People were breaking down doors to talk to Rav Chaim. The navardiker rebbetzin, she was pulling her hair out of her head when she lost her hair. MeHashem yatza hadavar, meheichan yatza? MeHara meriach. Hara meriach. He thought to himself, Who's going to marry my Akeidah? Who's going to marry my karbon? Who's going to marry this? And right away, saris avek. MeHashem yatza hadavar. The Rabbeinu Shlom firt a velt. Hashem yatza hadavar. Vakelt, when was she nolad? When was she nolad? She was nolad in the Akeidah, by the Akeidah. Hisbashesh shenolda. Hirah, Rabosai, hisbashesh shenolda. Meheichan yatza? A person thinks to himself, It's over. It's finished. It's hopeless. Ponkt vakelt. Meheichan yatza hadavar. You know when we're going to bring a korban todah? It's the only korban that will remain when Moshiach comes, Chazal. The only korban we bring when Moshiach comes, zogn the Chazal. Why are we going to bring a korban todah? And the teretz is, you know what a todah is? You start looking back and you start to realize all the things that the Ribono Shel Olam did. We thought it was galus. We thought it was bad. Mit nokh kumen un farshteyn, vi alts iz tsuzamgekumen, how it all came together to bring the final, final geulah. Az vi es shteyt in the parshah, and this I'm going to end, rabosai: Heima ra'u ma'aseh Hashem. They saw ma'aseh Hashem. V'niflo'osav. Mi chacham v'yavin ezos? Right? You have to be yavin, lizboinen u'chazdei Hashem. You have to understand. You know what the Torah is about? To be misbonein, to understand the chasdei Hashem. Mi chacham v'yavin eleh, v'yisbonenu chasdei Hashem, to be misbonein. That's Torah. That's shidduch. That's life. It all come together, and that's the avodah of the shidduchim, the kriyas Yam Suf, the shidduchim and the parnassah. You've just experienced another Torah class, brought to you by TorahAnytime.com.