Meeting the Baba Sali: A Lesson in Boshes Panim Before Hashem

Transcript

This Torah class is brought to you by TorahAnytime.com. So I got in together with my grandfather, and I see Bava Sali sitting on the bed, his feet crossed, על הגרעין שלו, שב ככה, כמו יושבים על הגרעין ככה. The bed was like this high, and he's just looking ahead, and he's staring. פתאום חשבתי, אומרים על צדיקים שיכולים לראות על הפנים את כל מה שאדם עושה. Here's a bizayon. Where is the bizayon? הייתי בחור טוב, ואל תחשוב, don't think I was a good bochur. I used to learn day and night. Could you imagine if he sees and he knows? Here's a bizayon. התחלתי לעשות תשובה. You have no idea the teshuva I did. I was embarrassed. I was embarrassed. What could he see on my face? קיצור, my grandfather runs over to him, and he, you know, tells the gabai, and the gabai whispers in Arabic. They were talking in Arabic, that he's מתעטף with tefillin and this and that, gives him a bracha, הצלחה. Me, I was afraid to even go close to the bed. He had very long fingers, extremely long fingers. They say, על פי קבלה יש עניין בזה, אני לא יודע, לא מקובל. They say that long fingers have something to do with tzaddik, with some neshama גבוהה, something. And he calls me that I should come to the... אמני בלב, oy yoy yoy yoy. That's it. Calls me, I come over. He tells me, Put my head down. I put my head down. He put his hand on top of me, and he spoke in Arabic. I don't know what he said, but it was a bracha. Okay. I left the room. He runs after me, the Gabbai. Who are you? Who are you? So my grandfather started saying, I'm so-and-so, and I put the tefillin in. No, no, no. Who's he? Now, the rest of the story I'm not going to tell you because it was good. He told me, he told me dvarim gedolim, big things, and it's shevachim that I don't want to tell people. It was dvarim shel shevach. It was very nice things. ... He אמר, יש לך חזקס סבאס, grandfathers, tzaddikei olam. Kach hu. And he's right. I did have. I had grandfathers who were big gedolim and tzaddikim. The rest I'm not going to tell you. What's the point? I told my grandfather to take a look. The one day that I decided to help my grandfather, sachiti. And for now, what are the chances of me seeing a Baba Sali? Nothing. I would never travel to Netivot, never. I'd never leave the yeshiva. The one day that I went to help, I got this. But what else did I learn? I learned this is a big lesson. Lifnei basar vadam, adam tzaddik, הייתי מתבייש מהפנים שלי. I was so embarrassed. I was embarrassed. Could you imagine, lifnei Melech malchei hamelachim, when we come Rosh Hashanah, Hashem looks. Look at us, huh? Eizeh boshet panim. Eizeh boshet panim, okay? That's not some busha. There's something called boshet panim. Now, rabosai, let me explain to you, slichot. Ready? Ten nitzavim hayom, standing in front of Hashem. You know, Lecha Hashem hatzedakah, v'lanu boshet hapanim. Why do we say that? Why don't we just say, Anachnu baishim? What is lecha hatzedakah? What is it, a chalukah? What, we're making a business deal here? You get this and I get this? It's a very strange language. What is lecha? Lecha hatzedakah, lanu boshet hapanim. תגיד, אני מתבייש, finished. רבונו של עולם, אני מתבייש. I'm embarrassed. תשמע, בראש השנה היהודי חוזר. He goes back to HaKadosh Baruch Hu. Haya rachok, he was very far away. ... בחוץ, ברחובות.

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