Emor: Three Foundations of Chinuch—Humility, Personal Example, and Love of Torah

Transcript

This Torah class is brought to you by TorahAnytime.com. We have the beginning of the parsha discussing about Kohen, the children of Aaron, and the halachas and zehirus, things that they have to be careful, how they're supposed to behave and what they're supposed to do. And even though it is a direct parsha to the Kohanim, the baalei mussar and the mefarshim take out of this lessons for everyone. And it's true, it's emor el haKohanim, it's addressed to the Kohanim, true. But as we will explain and discuss and bring out, that it's Kohanim, true, but it's actually broad. It's lessons that can be learned for the broad part of Klal Yisrael as well. And that is, and I believe, the lessons of chinuch. There's a lot of lessons of chinuch that can be taken from this parsha on how we're supposed to mechanech our children. And I would like to call it the three basic principles of chinuch for success, successful chinuch, I think can be learned in this parsha, can be taken out from the words of the pesukim and the Rashi and the Chazal. I'd like to begin by the famous shaila that all the mefarshim ask: Why does it say, El haKohanim bnei Aharon? We know that the Kohanim were bnei Aharon. This is already well established and well known. That the Kohanim were children of Aharon. Why was it necessary to emphasize, speak to the Kohanim, Bnei Aharon, the children of Aharon? We know the Kohanim are the children of Aharon. So there's many, many, many different pshatim that are said. Rashi quotes the Chazal, Bnei Aharon v'lo bnos Aharon. Bnei Aharon, af ba'alimumin. There are different halachos. There's a halachic reason for emphasizing Bnei Aharon, and that is the Bnei v'lo bnos, Bnei Aharon even ba'alimumin. This was the reason why the Torah wrote Bnei Aharon. The mefarshim and the baalei mussar give many, many other explanations. Some of them are quite classic and known. I'd like to just bring out one of them from the Bnei Yissaschar, a beautiful pshat. He says that this child, the kohen, he grows up to be different. He's being taught that he's different than the regular Yisrael, and that is because he's kadosh. He's more holy. Is that a good way to bring up a child? The child could begin to think to himself, Hey, you know, I'm special. Hey, you know that Yisrael? He doesn't have my halachos. In English we would say, I'm a special character. And it could get to his head. Says the Bnei Yissaschar, that is why we preempt and we tell him, Bnei Aharon. First of all, the reason why you have this kedusha is because you happen to be the child of Aharon, since Aharon who earned the kedusha. It's Aharon HaKohen who earned the kedusha. You happen to be in the lineage of Aharon HaKohen, so don't become haughty, don't become a baal gaivah because of it. And he says even, we could say one step further, that just like Aharon wouldn't have been a baal gaivah, just like Aharon didn't hold of himself better and bigger than others, the opposite, he was humble, he loved everyone. So remember that even though we put you on a pedestal, and we give you different halachos, and we make you that you're special and different, don't forget where you come from, Bnei Aharon. So again, says the Bnei Yissaschar that there's a hashkafah and a mussar reason to preempt and to emphasize that you're Bnei Aharon, the Kohanim are Bnei Aharon, and that is—

That the child should grow up normal, healthy. To know that even though he is given privileges, don't forget wherever he goes, he gets the first aliyah. We feed him, we b'trumah. A person could grow up thinking he's a special, he's a special, he's better than everyone else. Zogt the Torah, Bnei Aharon. Your privileges come from the fact that you're Bnei Aharon. And what would your grandfather Aharon already behave? How would he look at all this? He would be humble. So also you should be humble. In sefarim it's always discussed, the inyan of yichus, that people walk around taking yichus and misusing yichus. They take yichus and they don't properly utilize the yichus. In place of using the yichus properly, what they use yichus for: Look who I am. I'm the grandson of so-and-so, and so therefore... And the truth is, it's not the way you're supposed to deal with yichus. Yichus should be the opposite. My privileges are not mine; they come because I grew into a certain family. So a person should be humble. It's not who I am; it's only because of who my grandfather is, b'schus avosai. The Gemara always says, Kol hatoleh b'schus atzmo, toleh b'schus acheirim. A person shouldn't say me, but what do you say? Zchus avosai. That, yes, a person should always say, you know, my privileges come to me because of my past. But at the end, it's nothing to do with me, that I'm humble about it. And also, one should emulate his yichus, just like the yichus would be humble about it, so you too be humble. So the point is that the Torah here is teaching the child how to deal with his yichus, that he should know that he is privileged for being Bnei Aharon, yet understand that that becomes also a mechayev. That becomes the reason why you have to maybe do more because you're Bnei Aharon. So on one hand, it's a privilege, yes, but it's not a privilege that you're special and that you should become a bal gaivah and that you should hold yourself better and greater than others. This is what I would like to add a little more flavoring, so to speak, to the words of the Bnei Yissaschar that says that the reason why it says Bnei Aharon, that we should teach the child to understand his privilege of being a Kohen properly. He shouldn't misuse it or abuse it. And we added this point of yichus and understand what yichus is all about. I also believe that the Bnei Aharon can be used to learn a lesson in chinuch, learn a lesson in chinuch, besides what the Bnei Yissaschar says, to teach a child that— We expect him to live up to his yichus and understand that his ma'alos are because of his yichus. I also think that there's a chinuch lesson here, and that is, you know, this child is going to be different than everybody else. His life is going to be cut away for avodah. Where the rest of the world has options of business in front of them, they have options of having a life, so to speak. The kohen is destined to live in the Beis Hamikdash and do the avodah. So as a child growing up, he's going to feel that he's deprived. The kohen, as a kid, looks up and he says, Look, look at all the halachos that they put on me, all the restrictions. Look at the future, that I have to be in the Beis Hamikdash, but hamikdash lo yeitzei, even though it's referring to the Kohen Gadol, but the same idea. A kohen is shluchei d'Yisrael. His life is for the klal. He's not a private citizen. As a matter of fact, as we assume we'll learn, the Ketzos Rebbe, zichrono tzaddik livrachah, explains that that's why the Kohen Gadol doesn't go to funerals, not even his relatives. A regular kohen goes to the funeral of his relatives.

The Kohen Gadol doesn't even go for his closest relatives. Why not? Because he is being taught, and he has to learn and understand that he is not a private citizen with relatives. He belongs to the tzibur. All of Klal Yisrael now becomes his relatives, and therefore he doesn't go to his private, personal aveilus, but he is mechuyiv to remain, so to speak, anonymous to his family. He doesn't have family. Everybody's now his family. He belongs to everyone, the Kohen Gadol. So taking it back to what we're saying, a Kohen grows up in a way that he's almost not a person for his own self. He lives for the avodah. He lives for Klal Yisrael. He might feel deprived. So how do you bring up a child healthy? And the answer is, you tell him how lucky, how privileged he is that he has this job and he has this lot in life. Bnei Aharon, the point is to bring out you're special because you're the child of Aharon. You're supposed to elevate and show the chashivus of the lifestyle that he's going to have, the privilege that he has to be a Kohen. And then the child will be able to fill into the shoes of being a Kohen. Otherwise, he's going to feel that's restricted. He's going to feel deprived. We have to bring out— That he's important, and how special, and how gifted he is to be a Kohen. You look at Rabbeinu Yonah in the Iggeres, in his Iggeres HaTeshuvah, he writes this yesod clearly, that it's important for a person to know ma losav u'ma l'asavosav. In order for a person to be matzliach in avodah, he has to realize the privilege and the zechus that he has, that he was taken and chosen to do this. Ashreinu, ma tov chelkeinu, u'ma na'im goralenu, u'ma yafa yerushaseinu. I always say, what's the pshat? There's three things here: Ashreinu, ma tov chelkeinu, that's our lot; ma yafa yerushaseinu, which is what we received in the past, the avos; u'ma yafa yerushaseinu, our inheritance. Ashreinu, ma tov chelkeinu, ma na'im goralenu— I skipped one of them. Ashreinu, ma tov chelkeinu, ma na'im goralenu. What is goralenu? Goralenu means the future. A goral means when someone wins something, the lot that's going to be allotted to him. Goralenu. So we talk about chelkeinu, present; goralenu, in the future, Olam Haba; u'ma yafa yerushaseinu, our past. When we realize the merit, the zechus, how lucky we are with our past, our present, and our future, then we can be ovdei Hashem. If a child doesn't realize how lucky he is to do avodas Hashem, he's not going to be able to do it. This is our Rabbeinu Yonah, the yesod of Rabbeinu Yonah, that a child, a person must know, ma'loisov u'ma'alos avosov, where he comes from, the zechus that he's a ben Yaakov and a ben Yisrael, a child of Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov. And this is what we teach the kohen. We teach the kohen that he should understand he's bnei Aharon. And I'll tell you where I've seen this lesson clearly expressed in the words of the Chasam Sofer, which was the grandson of the Chasam Sofer, and yet even in the Chasam Sofer himself, based on the pesukim, the Chasam Sofer says an interesting thing. One could ask a question. We know that one of the mechanisms to fight the yetzer hara is yaskir l'yom hamisah, that he should remember the day of death. That's one of the tools that are needed to fight the yetzer hara. As a matter of fact, when a person goes to a levayah, that is one of the lessons of life, v'chai yiten el libo. We speak it out clearly, that those that live, when they come back from a funeral, yiten el libo, they should take the mussar.

They should take lesson that no one lives forever. Hacha yiten al libo. It's brought down in minhagim that when you go to a funeral, you go one way, and when you return from the funeral, you take a different road. We learn this from Yosef. You know, Yosef HaTzadik says, Chazal, that when he passed by the pit where he had the miracle, they threw him into a pit and he survived. The brothers threw him in, he survived. It was a miracle. He made a bracha, Baruch she'asah li nes bamakom hazeh. The mefarshim point out, the Medrash clearly states that he didn't say it on the way to the funeral when he went to Canaan, but it says b'chazaro, on the way back from the funeral of Yaakov, he made this bracha. And we've spoken about this question in the past. Why does he make the bracha only on the way back and not on the way there? Well, maybe on the way there he was an אונן. Maybe an אונן doesn't make brachos, doesn't do mitzvahs. We had big discussions about this in the past. We've even said once that maybe he said it both times, on the way there and on the way back. And what Chazal mean that the brothers saw that he said it twice, which means that he doesn't stop thinking about it. He actually didn't do it only once, but he did it twice. He did do it on the way there as well as the way back. But the Chazal just are trying to say that the brothers were scared when they saw it. Which one did they get scared by? Not the first one, because that he was supposed to make, but that he returned and made it again. That's what they were scared. We've spoken about this in the past. The Pardes Yosef brings from people before him that explain that maybe on the way in they took a different route. And on the way back, they pass by where the pit was. And the reason for this, because like we told you, that to a funeral you go one route, and on the return of the funeral you take a different route. The custom was to go one route on the way to the funeral and a different street and a different road the way back. And the reason for that is a lesson that one must change his ways after a funeral. You go to a levaya, it's not the same person and the same mahalach hachayim. Life has to have a detour now. It's got to be a new road. It's got to change your way. It's not the same thing as before. So we're taking this tool away from the kohen. He doesn't go to funerals. So ask the Chasan Sofer and others, so then what happens to this tool that he's supposed to fight the yetzer hara with? We don't let him go to a funeral. What does he do with the yaskin l'yom hamisah? Says the Chasan Sofer, it's true, we take away this remembrance of death, but we give him something else, and that is we elevate and we give him the chashivus of telling ptoishim to you that you're holy. We tell him, fight your yetzer hara by realizing how special you are, how heilig bistu. You bist a heilige mensh. You're a holy person. He says that's what it means in the pasuk. The pasuk says, Kedoshim. Ah, it says in the pasuk—well, he actually brings it by the Kohen Gadol. It says by the Kohen Gadol, V'al kol nefashos meis lo yavo. He doesn't come in contact at all with misa. He doesn't discuss misa. He stays away from the whole idea of misa. And, l'aviv ul'imo lo yitama. And he doesn't even be metame himself to his father and his mother, explains the Chasam Sofer. One of the things that a person is supposed to think is, Meayin basa? From where did you come from? That's l'aviv ul'imo. You don't think about that either. What do we tell you? What should you think? Ki nezer Hashem al rosho. Remember that you're crowned. You're special. And that's the mechanism that you should fight the yetzer hara with. When you realize who you are and what you were chosen to do, then you'll stay away from doing the aveiros that the yetzer hara convinces you. It's a whole different way, a different approach. We don't want you to take the approach of, Oh, you're gonna die. No. Realize what you were chosen...

Appreciated. The Chasam Sofer's grandfather, the Chasam Sofer, also said this yesod, and he put it back into the pasuk in Eichah, in drush. The pasuk says that a kohen doesn't go to a funeral, and then it says, lo yikchu korchah b'rosham, ufaas konam lo yigaleichu, which means they don't rip the hair of their head, and they don't shave off their beards, and on their flesh, uvibsaram lo yisretu seretes, they shouldn't do scratches, they shouldn't cut themselves. The question, first of all, is, I mean, it's not only a kohen; no one's allowed to do this. So the Gemara speaks about it. The Chasam Sofer has a very nice pshat somewhere else in the drashos. He says that only a kohen would take the death of someone else that serious. Regular Yisrael doesn't care that much. Only a kohen who's really an ohev Yisrael and loves Klal Yisrael, to him it would move him so much, the death of another person, to the point that he would want to cut himself and hurt himself. So that's why it was said specifically to the kohen. Not about tattoo. Lo yikchu korchah b'rosham ufaas konam lo yigaleichu was said specifically to the kohen because it's more common for the kohen. It makes more sense for the kohen to want to do it. Most people, when they go to the funeral, they're thinking already how they're going to go home and eat lunch. The kohen, when he goes to the funeral, he took it serious because now he's not allowed to go to the funeral, and he's also not allowed to do these acts of aveilus. But then the Chasam Sofer, like I said, al haTorah gives a different, and he says a different pshat, a peirush in the pasuk, and he says al pi drush. They shouldn't cut b'roisam. What's b'roisam? Roisam means where they started from, me'ayin basa. Pa'askanam, what does pa'as mean? The end. Lo natahilech. Where's your end? V'sha'atarimah v'seileya, that you're made from rimah, that's lo yishtu b'bsaram, and in their flesh. Lo yishtu serotes. Don't dig into your flesh that you'll become worms. Don't think all this. What should you think? Kedoshim yihyu, leloiheichem. They should think, yeah, but you're right. I don't think about death, and what should I... Kedoshim. You're special. Kedoshim, you're special. You're holy. You were chosen. You're lucky. It's a zechus. Understand and appreciate, and you won't do any aveiros. So we see the same thread, the grandfather and the grandson and all the other mefarshim as well, many speak about, boy, elevation. We elevate. So this is a lesson. We want our children to be bnei Torah. We want them to be different. We're giving them a life of restriction. It's not easy, you know. When everyone is having fun, we tell them, sit down to learn Torah. When everyone is making money, we tell them, hopefully one day you'll be a ben Torah, tzaddik, yirei shamayim. He looks at it, wow, that's a restrictive life. What are you doing? And the answer is, if the father gives the flavor that it's a special, it's a zechus, it's an honor, it's a privilege, then, he'll be able to do it. It's very important to make it sound to the child. That he's lucky to be a ben Torah. Ashreinu, mah tov chelkeinu. And it's not just talk; you have to really feel that. I once said over to Rav Shach, I asked Rav Shach a question: How does one do to be mashpia, to give over that others should want to learn Torah? How is it? What is the secret of success in that? So Rav Shach said, if you take a look, it says clearly, V'haarev na, Hashem Elokeinu es divrei Sorascha b'finu uvfi amcha. It has to be sweet. And then v'nihyeh anachnu v'tze'etzaeinu v'tze'etza... clearly. And then our children will be, and our grandchildren. If it's sweet by you, then the grandchildren will pick up on it. The children and grandchildren will pick up on it. Which means if you lead by example on how lucky and how delicious it is, and how matoiv chelkeinu, ma na'im goraleinu, then the children will follow. But if in the father that they notice it's difficult, if in the father they notice that it's not, it's something which is a...

Need to ... with ... You do it, but it's not easy. Not gonna work. The yeshiva's atzal, and we'll talk about it a little bit later more about this point. Rav Shiva Ramoisha's atzal said that in America, a lot of people had a hard time with the Shabbos. Hard time. And years later, their children, a lot of them went off the derech, lost a lot of people from it. And the reason is because they learned in the home, Oy, schwer, it's difficult, the Shabbos. We're losing our jobs, schwer. So when the child picks up from the father that it's difficult, psychologically he lives, I'm deprived, and he won't want to do it. If the father lives, Ashreinu ma tov chelkeinu, ma na'im goralenu, then the children pick it up with happiness. They're happy to continue. So the first point: show the child Ashreinu, that he's privileged, that he was chosen to learn and to daven and to be a frum ehrliche Yid and a ben Torah. The second point, I believe, is simcha. In order for a child to want, the father has to show. Avodah means happiness. It's a happy thing, not a sad thing. Like I just told you from the Rosh Yeshiva zatzal, that if the father makes it like, Oy, it's difficult, and where did I learn this from? What is the reason why we restrict the kohen from going to a funeral? So I told you over from the Kotzker that says that the kohen gadol has to learn. That he's not limited to a family. Everyone, all of Klal Yisrael now is his family, and therefore we don't come and say, even your sister, your brother, that's not your family. All of Klal Yisrael is your family. But that only explains the Kohen Gadol. What about the Kohen Hedyot? Why does the Kohen Hedyot not go to the funeral? So you could come and say, kedushah, tumah, right? He becomes tamei. He has to do avodah in the Beis Hamikdash, right? In Chassidish sefarim, they talk a lot about the ideal, an idea of that if he goes to a funeral, he'll be בעצבות. Avodah needs simchah. There's a contrast between avodah and levayah. It doesn't work. And so we tell the Kohen, you don't have to do with misa. You stay away from all of this. You need to be tamid b'simchah, constantly happy, upbeat, ecstatic. And this is really what we were bringing out, and I think it's point number two. You have to give a feeling not only privilege, but that simchah, upbeat, happy. The atmosphere around the child has to be one of simchah, simchah to do a mitzvah, simchah to learn Torah, and the child picks up on that. And the child is happy then to learn, because if avodah, if you want him to give his whole full self to learning and davening, if it's not b'simchah, it's not going to work. It just doesn't work. So the lesson two in Chinuch would be simcha. Lesson one, privilege. Lesson two, simcha. What's lesson three? Lesson three is not just preaching; it's to teach by example. If you preach while you don't show it as an example, it's not going to work. Chofetz Chaim, zicher tzaddik livrachah, told us that that's the reason why Pesach night, chayav adam liros es atzmo k'ilu yatza miMitzrayim. Why is it that important that a person should really feel as if he left Mitzrayim? Why is that? I thank Eibishter for taking us out of Mitzrayim. I have to feel as if I'm leaving Mitzrayim? Says the Chofetz Chaim something unique. You want to teach emunah. You want that the child should feel what it means to be a yotzei miMitzrayim. It's important that you give it over first, that you feel it yourself to the extent as if you yourself left. You teach by example, not by talking. I can tell my kid from today till tomorrow, I left Mitzrayim. If you yourself don't feel like you left Mitzrayim, you yourself don't...

Portray that it's deep. It's something that you yourself believe in, as if it happened to you, that it's not going to be able to be taught to the next generation. Chofetz Chaim used to say that's the pshat, v'shinantam l'vanecha v'dibarta bam. You want to teach the children Torah? First, v'dibarta bam. You yourself have to talk about it. First you v'dibarta. If you talk in learning, then the children will hear. You tell the kid, You learn while the father, I'm busy. Pa, you want me to learn. Ta, Abba, you want me to learn. So you also have to learn. The only way to do it is to teach by example. And where did I learn this? I learned this from the first Rashi. It says in the pasuk, Emor el haKohanim bnei Aharon v'amarta aleihem. So it's a double lashon: emor, say to the Kohanim, v'amarta. Why the repetition? says Rashi, l'hazhir gedolim al haktanim, that the elders are responsible to teach the young. Is that chinuch? Is that the mitzvah of chinuch? First of all, the mitzvah of chinuch, probably, is only derabbanan. And if there's a general mitzvah of chinuch by everyone, then why do I need a special pasuk by the kohen? Why do I need a special limud, a pasuk, l'hazhir gedolim al haktanim? There's a mitzvah of chinuch anyway. A father must make sure that his child does what he has to do. Notice, rabboisai, it doesn't say l'hazhir that the avos should teach the banim. That's not what it says. It says, l'hazhir hagdolim al haktanim. So what do we mean? Do we mean the father? Maybe we don't even mean the father. Maybe we mean something completely different. And I'd like to make another diyuk, rabboisai. If you mean that the father should teach the children, or the father, the elders should teach the young, so it should have said, l'hazhir shehagdolim yazhiru haktanim. What do you mean, l'hazhir? L'hazhir means to teach the gedolim. L'hazhir means that we should make sure that the gedolim are told, the elders are told and warned, and they're al haktanim, that they should give it over to the children. Just say l'hazhir, that we should come and tell that the gedolim should be mashir haktanim. That's not what the words mean. L'hazhir gedolim al haktanim means, and I think this is really a beautiful pshat in the Rashi, that the elders should do it in a way that the ketanim will learn from them. It is l'hazhir hagdolim. We're not telling the gedolim l'hazhir haktanim. That's not what the mitzvah is. We're not telling the gedolim that they should talk to the ketanim, but it's the way the gedolim should do it, l'hazhir, to tell them how they should do it in a way that it should be emor to the next generation, that the children should learn from them by example, by example. Lesson number three in Chinuch, rabboisai, is— You want your child to do above what regular children do. You want them to be bnei Torah. You want them to daven properly. There's only one way to do it, and that is l'ha'zir hagdolim, that the gedolim should do it, that they should be careful, l'ha'zir, that they should be careful, in a way al haktanim, that it is taught, it is mushpa to the next generation, to the ktanim. My rebbi Rav Pam once told me something very יפה, beautiful pshat Rashi, l'ha'zir hagdolim, that the gedolim should be muzharim b'zeh, b'ofen, shezeh gam al haktanim. That's emor, speak to the gedolim that they should do it, therefore amarta aleihem, that should go to the next generation. My rebbi Rav Pam told me once a nice maaseh. I've said it here in the past, that there was once a child in the school that got a smack and was taken to the principal. Why? The rebbi asked, What's more important than Torah? What takes preference? Is there anything that takes kadima, preference, over Torah? So everybody said, No, no, Torah, Torah, everything's more, but Torah is the most important thing. One child raised his hand and he said—

He knows, cholent, that the cholent on Shabbos is more important than the Torah. The svarim dafna, the dafna. What do you call the oshalov, Shabbosov, osavo? That the osavo, you hear, is more important than the Torah. The Rebbe smacked up the kid. He thought he was playing around with him. He sent him to the principal. The principal asked him, How could you say a thing like this? He said, What do you want from me? It's not my fault. Every Shabbos, I come to the Shabbos table and I tell my father that I have a dvar Torah from my Rebbe from school that I want to say it over. And you know what my father tells me? Not yet. First comes the cholent. First we eat the osavo. First we eat the cholent. So I see that the cholent comes before the Torah. What do you want from me? I see that the cholent comes before the Torah. What do you want from me? Rav Pam told me, Rav Chaim Volozhin told me, I don't know about the smack, he said. You know, Rav Pam would never hit anybody. He was a tzaddik. He was such a... About the smack, I don't know, but there's a lot of daas Torah in the story. At the time where you should sit at a Shabbos table, you hear? At the time where you should sit at a Shabbos table. Best times, in English we call it family quality time. You can teach so much to a child, you hear? What happens? We teach him that the cholent is more important than the Torah. So what do you expect? This is lehazig gedolim al... They pick up very quickly. Nuance. Did the father say the child is more important than the Torah? No. But that's really what he was saying, right? If he wasn't able to hold out one minute, not eating the dafna, the asa, or the whatever it's called, right, because he had to eat that, then push off the dvar Torah. So that's what you're teaching your child. The child's going to come to school learning that this is more important than this. This, rabosai, is the lesson of l'hachazik gedolim al haketanim. You want the ketanim to do it. The gedolim have to do it first. That's what you learn from over here. The gedolim have to do it first. And when they do it and how they do it, that's how it's going to be mashpia on the next generation. It doesn't take much. All it takes is a wink. Attitude. Attitude comes from simple, subtle, subtle, subtle responses from a parent. Doesn't need a big drasha to ruin, to ruin a chashivus for bnei Torah. You know, example, you're sitting at a table and the father and the child brings up this rav, this gadol, this one said, and you make like a little nuance. You just killed your kid away. He just learns, ah, this, this, bnei Torah, yeshivos, gedolim, Torah, nuance. Little things, little things, little things, little things. Chashivus. A person has to show and teach by example. And this I call the three basic principles of success in chinuch. The first thing is elevate, elevate. Instead of knocking him down. Instead of telling him, Ah, take a look, Yom HaMisa, death. Be scared to, be scared. No, nothing. Don't be scared, nothing. Realize how privileged you are to be a ben Torah. You know, rabosai, kohen doesn't have to be only kohen, and that's how I started the parsha with. These lessons of chinuch is anybody. Klal Yisrael is atem tihyu li mamleches kohanim v'goy kadosh. It's everybody. The Rambam discusses in the end of Hilchos Re'iyim that it's not only shevet Levi. Anyone who puts himself in a corner, so to speak, to learn and to daven, and cuts himself away from the silliness, craziness of the world is called a kohen. The lessons of chinuch that we have here by kohen apply to anybody, in any home where you want your child to be special, to grow up different, a ben Torah, a kadosh, a holy child, a holy Jew. The way to do it is elevate the tafkid. Elevate. Look how lucky you are to do this. Beis, it has to be b'simcha. A lot of happiness, a lot, a lot of happiness. And third of all, it has to be by example. And those are the three cardinal rules of chinuch. I'd like to talk about two other topics in the parsha.

I'd like to speak about what it means, chesed. Chesed, the importance of chesed. You know, in the Meyadim, rabboisai, all about the Yom Tovim and the korbanos. Beautiful, right? Moed. We know moed is what? Mekadesh Yisrael v'hazmanim. Moed is kedusha, kedushas hamoed, right? Moed is called mikraei kodesh, to the point that we have special korbanos moed, right? Beautiful. Chagigah, korban. Aliyah l'regel, you went to the Beis Hamikdash. In the middle of the parsha of the moadim, we have leket, shikcha, and peah. And they all ask, and meforshim all discuss, how did leket, shikcha, and peah, mitzvos matnos aniyim, come in in the middle of the moadim? Many different terutzim are said. I believe the most simple pshat that I hold is emes l'amito. I think I was zoche, Baruch Hashem, b'ezras Hashem yisbarach, to say over, I think I said it years ago, I'd like to say it again. There's a lesson to be learned, that what is moed? Moed is about kedusha, mekadesh. Moed is about korbanos. We learned all the korbanos. There's no such thing as moed and korbanos of moed if it's not about matnos aniyim. And where did I learn this from? If you didn't take care of the ani, it's all nothing, the Rambam. Rambam says clearly in perek vav of Hilchos Yom Tov. Af al pi, sheachilo shtiya. Here, I'm sorry, Yud Ches. He talks about simchas Yom Tov, telling what they should get, candies, women should get clothing, men should eat meat and wine. Now, u'k'shehu oichel, says the Rambam, perek vav, halacha yud ches, k'shehu oichel v'shoseh chayav l'hachil l'ger. You're chayav, you hear the lashon? It's not a good advice; it's a chiyuv to feed the ger, the yasom, almana, im she'ar ha'aniyim ha'melolin, with all the other rest of the broken poor people. Aval mi sheno'el daltas chatzeiro, if someone locks his door, v'ochel v'shoseh hu u'banav, ishto, v'eino machil mashkeh la'aniyim, u'lemarei nefesh, ein zo simchas mitzvah. That's not called simchas mitzvah, ela simchas kreiso. Al eilu ne'emar, and on this it says, zivcheihem kilechem onim lahem kol ochelav yitamu. I don't need your korbanos. This is tummy, tummy korbanos. Here, simchah zo, kolu lahem zarisi pras p'neichem. So I think the parshah of leket, shichchah, peah come in in the middle of the mo'adim. A person can be mamash daven all day on Yom Tov, and a person can bring all the best korbanos; it's all nothing if it's not leket, shichchah, and peah. You know, rabosai, I think always that we don't have an understanding of what it means. And how important it is in the Torah, בין אדם לחבירו, to care about another person. I don't think we have the depth, the deep understanding that the Torah requires of us, and as well as what the Gedolim previous generations had in this area. We think it's a nice thing. We think if a person does chesed, you know, he's a tzaddik. I'm going to discuss with you that maybe this is the most important thing in the Torah. And I don't want to say it as a final thing, because it's a big discussion. But I want to show you what I understood this Shabbos, something interesting. In Pirkei Avos, Mishnah Yud-Zayin, the Mishnah says, Shlosha kesarim heim. There's three crowns. There's keser Torah, keser kehunah, and keser malchus. The keser shem tov oleh al kulan. The keser shem tov is even greater. It's even bigger. It's more. It's even more than the other ones. What is keser shem tov? How does one achieve, how does one earn keser shem tov? The Rambam learns that it comes from the Torah. If a person has keser Torah...

The Torah makes it that he should have keser shem tov. If you look at the Mishnah in Avos, perek vav, that's one of the things about someone who learns Torah lishmah, he gets a good name, people like him. So the Rambam and the peirush Mishnayos learns the keser shem tov comes from keser Torah. You look at Rabbeinu Yonah. Rabbeinu Yonah learns from learning and kiyum hamitzvos. That's how Rabbeinu Yonah brings the keser shem tov. It's a result. It's a result. It feeds off from the person who keeps the Torah and the mitzvos. What Torah? What mitzvos? All of them, maybe. Yiras Shamayim, maybe because a person has yiras Shamayim, he has a keser shem tov. A lot of Rishonim learn like that. I think the Nefesh HaChaim, the Ruach Chaim, Reb Chaim Volozhin learns that if a person has yiras Shamayim, he has keser shem tov. I saw two Chofetz Chaims in Ahavas Chesed. One Chofetz Chaim, he says like this: if a person has good traits and he does acts of kindness, he has a tremendous thing going for him, and that is that people want to learn from him. People like him. People look at him and go, you know, I want to be like that person. Comes out he's a mekadesh shem Shamayim. A mekadesh shem Shamayim, it comes out that he will have Olam Haba. V'al zeh ne'emar, says the Chofetz Chaim in Ahavas Chesed, on this it says, keser shem tov oleh al kulan. The implication is that the person who does maasim tovim, which means he acts kindness. That's what gives a keser shem tov. I saw another piece of Chofetz Chaim, further, I think in perek yud tes, a little bit further down in Ahavas Chesed. He says there's an interesting Gemara in Shabbos. The Gemara says, aleph, beis, gimel, daled, hei, vav, that they darshen a drasha that even for the times Yeshuv b'no, no one said this. A rebbe from children came to the beis medrash, and he said, Aleph, bina, gimel, daled. The first thing a person should know is to be gomel dalim, and if that, then the Eibishter will give you ches, tes, cheses, chein, tes, yud, yakar, olam haba. To the point that if a person is gomel dalim, that he takes care of the poor—gomel means gives money to the poor—aleph, beis, gimel, daled, right? Aleph, bina, the first thing you have to know, aleph, bina, to know, gimel, daled, gimel, daled, and then you'll get everything to the point you'll get even tzarim l'olam haba. That's the words of the Gemara, says the Chofetz Chaim. That's what it means over here, keser shem tov, oylal kulana. So again, I learned from here that the Chofetz Chaim understood when it says keser shem tov, it means doing acts of kindness, running after people to help them. And this is—where is this keser? In Olam Haba. And I was thinking to myself, is there such a thing as keser malchus in Olam Haba? I don't know. Is there such a thing as keser kehunah in Olam Haba? No. But keser shem tov might be a keser that goes to Olam, and that's maybe what it means, keser oylal kulana, goes higher than the rest of them. Maybe the keser of shem tov is in Olam Haba. It stays with you. You see a man in Olam Haba with a crown, ooh, he must have shem tov. And where does the shem tov come from? Because he did acts of kindness. So it comes out that acts of kindness is so important. Now let me show you something interesting. You know, one of the Mishnayos that we have in the Pirkei Avos, in Perek Daled, talks about l'olam yehei makdim adam. A person should be makdim shalom l'chol adam. It's one of the Mishnayos in Pirkei Avos, makdim shalom l'chol adam. And he says hello to everybody. Now the Gemara, Rashi brings it down, that's even a goy, even a goy, you should say hello to. Now what does the word makdim mean? What does the word makdim mean? It means I say hello to him? No. Makdim means I say hello before he even says hello to me. The word makdim, makdim shalom means that him before me. How do I know this? The Gemara in Yud-Zayin in Brachos says, ... ben Akana.

Ilu lo yikdimei adam. No one ever said hello to him first. He always got the first hello. This was a big thing. So I had a question: what's the big deal? What's the difference if he say first, I say hello to you? It's such a big deal who said it first? I beat you to the punch. So I had a discussion with my Rebbe, Rav Pam, about this once. I want to tell you what I discussed with him, you know? I don't understand. I'll show you how far this goes. In Perek Vav, Rabbi Yosi ben Kisma says a story. I was once walking, and somebody bumped into me, and he gave me a shalom. He said hello to me, and I returned him shalom. I returned the hello. And then this person came and said to me, I want you to come and live with us. He says, I'm not going to do that, even if you pay me all the money in the world. I come from a city of all talmidei chachamim. Very strange, the beginning of the story. He said hello to me, I said hello to him. I said hello to him. I mean, who cares? When you see a story, you have to see all the details. I said hello, he said hello. Just say you met a person and he asked you to come to visit and live in his city. You don't have to talk about the... and he was sitting and I was standing. What's the... It's irrelevant. He said hello to me and I said hello to him. Not so irrelevant. The Medrash Shmuel comes and asks a great question. He says, I don't understand. Why is it that he said hello first? How come he didn't keep the Mishnah that says you should say hello first? Yeah? How come, says the Medrash Shmuel, I don't understand. So the Medrash Shmuel answers, he didn't know if he was a Yid or a goy. Might have been a goy. So misafek, he waited for the other guy. That's what the Medrash Shmuel says. How did he know how that determined whether he knew he was a Yid? No, so therefore he didn't say hello to him first. He waited for—then when the guy said hello to him, he started talking to him. I said, Shalom, he knew he was a Yid. He's a Yid, right? The word shalom. Question: Didn't we just learn that you're supposed to be makdim shalom even to a goy? Rashi. That's what Rashi says, Makdim shalom even to a goy. Rashi says it on that Mishnah, clearly. So we want to say a pshat—many years ago I said pshat, could be like this: to be makdim shalom, Rashi's shita is that l'goy. L'maaseh, the Rambam doesn't bring this. The Rambam brings that a talmid chacham should be makdim shalom to everybody. He doesn't speak about a goy. The Rambam in Hilchos Avodah Zarah says that sho'alin bishlom—you're asking the shalom in the peace of a goy, mipnei darkei shalom, in order to have peace with the goy. He doesn't say you should do it first, though. You could ask from— you could say shalom aleichem to him. Maybe the Rambam didn't hold that by a goy you have to be the first one. You definitely have to say hello, and you definitely need a heter to say hello, but you might not have to be the first one, maybe. But Rashi is a good question. From Rashi's mashma that even a goy you should be first. So what do you do with that Mishnah? So I'll tell you what I said pshat. I once saw a beautiful story from Reb Moshe Leib Sassover. He was from the big rebbes, from the tzaddikim, like we have in the litvishe velt, Rabbi Yisrael Salanter. The Chassidishe velt has Reb Leib Sassover, that type of a musser and chesed and ahavas Yisroel, that type of a person. So it's brought that in his avodah, one of the things he was very makpid, very careful about, was this: that no one should ever say hello to him first. He should be the first one to say hello. Yeah? So the story over there in the sefer, I think it's called Ein Yosef, brings down a story that one time a guy in the shul wanted to see if he could play like a trick on Reb Moshe Leib Sassover, and he'll go and run over to him and be the first one to say hello. He'll beat him to the punch. A guy in the shul wanted to see if he could do this. So he hid from the behind, and he started running towards Reb Moshe Leib Sassover to scream, Hello! And like this, ah, you see? It happened. He got the first hello, not Reb Moshe Leib Sassover. What happened? Some father whose son was named Moshe Leib gave a scream at that moment, Moshe Leib! Gave a scream to his son, had nothing to do with it. Reb Moshe Leib turned around, thinking it was, and he sees this guy running towards him. He says, Sholom Aleichem!

Here, and he said it was min haShamayim, the Eibishter was helping him, that he shouldn't go against this Chazal that he was makpid. Since he was always so careful about it, so I went to my Rebbe, I don't understand, what's the big deal? What's a UCLO first, I say hello first? Who cares? Who cares? It's a good question, right? It's a big deal. Who cares? What's the big deal? He's saying hello anyway. The guy's playing game with me. What's the big deal, right? Okay, now I want to tell you even more. Tenuas haMussar that's brought down—Tenuas haMussar. It's a very nice sefer. It brings down all from the greatly haMussar, all their different actions in Mussar, you know, their behavioral things about Mussar. Beautiful, very beautiful sefer. So Tenuas haMussar is brought down that the Alter from Slabodka, zecher tzaddik v'kadosh livrachah, was very makpid also on this inyan of saying hello to everybody. He would stand by the window looking for people to say hello to them. Like Avraham Avinu looked for people to bring into his house, he would look by his window, I need to say hello to somebody. So they say that when he would walk in the streets in Slabodka, many a time you would hear him saying hello to people who weren't even there. There was nobody there. He would walk around and go, Morning, morning. No. So the talmidim asked, but Rebbe, there's nobody here. So he says, What do you mean? The rav of Slabodka lives in the house over here. Yeah, but he's not here. He has to be in front of me. I could give him a brachah even if he's not in front of me. I'm bringing him a bracha. He should have a good morning. So he would walk around giving people brachos in their houses, even though they weren't face to face with him. I asked Rav Pam, I said, Don't you think it's like a little exaggerated? Don't you think this is like, you have to start saying hello to people that are not even there? A little risky, right? Who knows if someone looks at it, they'll lock him up, right? Rav Pam answered me, he says, Because we're so far from understanding kavod habriyos and how much one loves and should love another person, we don't realize. You're right, for us it looks bizarre. When you love, when you love and you have kavod habriyos, it's different. And I want you to know that I thought about a lot what the Rosh Yeshiva told me, and I thought of a beautiful raya. You know, the end of the Mishnah in Brachos, the last Mishnah in Brachos, actually the last part of the last Mishnah in Brachos, in the last perek, it says that hiskinu chachamim, the chachamim made a takanah that when you say hello to somebody, you do it b'shem Hashem. You don't say shalom; you say shalom in the name of Hashem. Says the Mishnah, but isn't that a wrong thing to do? To use the name of Hashem to say hello to somebody? Ein laasos laShem hefer torasecha. It's so important, you hear, that we say you should even undo what the—laasos laShem hefer torasecha—go against what the halacha is. Use Hashem's name for nothing? For what? The word shalom is the name of Hashem. And on top of that, it says, you say shalom b'shem Hashem, like Boaz. We learn from Boaz, because Boaz said, Hashem imchem hakotzrim, Hashem should be with you. So we learn shalom b'shem Hashem. You use the name; you actually say Hashem's name. Says Rashi, ayimim mezalzel? Ayu, yu, yu. No, because that's what Eibishter would want. To be mezalzel in Him, mipnei kavod habriyos, that's what Rashi says. To make cheap, to act in a way that's cheapening, minimizing. Why? Al kavod habriyos, לקיים the pasuk, Bakesh shalom v'radfeihu, that you have to run to do, you have to search out to do shalom. So what do I learn from here? That makdim. Makdim means I have to run to do it. Maybe I'll have an opportunity. Bakesh, search it, look in. No, don't wait for the opportunity to come to you. And don't say, you know what, he'll say hello to me, I'll say hello to him. No. Bakesh, you have to search. This, rabosai, is called keser shem tov, and this is maybe olam kulo. It's goimel dalim. It says, what's the word goimel dalim? The Gemara says that the daled is, he runs. The daled doesn't have a foot; it has one foot, two feet, right? The gimel has two feet; the daled has one foot.

So the gimel means that he runs, says the Gemara. He runs with two feet. It's not enough just to do what? To do the chesed. It's to run to do the chesed. And this is chesed she'ein taiv, and this is olam al kulanu. We're very far, boys. Very, very, very, very, very, very far from what it's supposed to look like and what we're supposed to understand al pi haTorah, for what the Torah wants us to understand bein adam l'chaveiro. Very, very far. Okay, I'd like to give a third lesson, if you don't mind, one more minute, two more minutes. I got no more room. Okay, I cannot. One more lesson from the parsha, Nagea to Shavuos. What is the noise? Okay, one more lesson from the parsha. Nagea to Shavuos. Shavuos is around the corner. How do we prepare ourselves for Shavuos? Now, the truth is, Sefiras HaOmer was meant to prepare for Shavuos. As a matter of fact, if you look at the Ran in the end of Pesachim, the Ran says that even though there was no korban omer in the Midbar, they still counted Sefiras HaOmer because they counted it to Shavuos, to Kabbalas HaTorah. What about Sefiras HaOmer is hachanah to Kabbalas HaTorah? So you look at the Maharal. The Maharal explains that there's 48 kinyanei haTorah, and there's 49 days. So those 48 days, you do one kinyan a day. Ay, 49? You just said there's 48 kinyanei haTorah. So the Chassidishe velt from the Tzfas Emes, they bring that you should repeat. The 49 days, chazarah on all 48. You have to repeat. You have to work one day to repeat everything, chazarah, to work on it. Meshesh Rabbeinu, the yeshiva Zatzal, Reb Meirin said that there's one day that you have all of it. That's a separate day, to have them all, all of them in unity. And we spoke about this in the past years, unity in the middos. There's one thing to have separate middos, but then to have them all together, the shleimus. Okay. I saw in the Bnei Yissaschar, Moedi Katan. Bnei Yissaschar says that part of the sefirah, and I want to say more on my own because he really comes from a different angle and there's not enough time to go through the whole Bnei Yissaschar, but basically it's the same yesod. You know what the preparation in the sefiras haOmer is? The fact that I count towards, I look forward to it. When a person gets married, he counts down the days. That itself is the preparation. Where did I learn this from? Yehoshua's na'ar lo yamush mitoch ha'ohel. Yehoshua stood in preparation. What was the preparation? Lo yamush, that he didn't let go for a moment, constantly looking forward for the moment that it's going to come. Anticipation, that's the word I'd like to use. Yehoshua stood by the par, not to miss a second. Anticipation. That's called Kabbalas haTorah, and that's why Yehoshua's kibel Torah. He was the one who was the mekabel Torah from Moshe Rabbeinu. V'hu na'ar. He might have not been the biggest. The Rishonim say he wasn't the biggest of the talmidim, but he was the one who was na'ar lo yamush mitoch... anticipation. Sefiras haOmer, I believe, is anticipation. With this I understand why you can't miss even one day, and it has to be temimos. Tmimos tihyena. It should be tmimos. What does it mean, tmimos? Because anticipation means not to be masiach daas from. You anticipate something and long for it. You don't take it out of your mind. No one forgets for a second that he's getting married in a week. It doesn't work that way. And if it is, it's a sign he's not really happily getting married. The fact that a person anticipates a good thing to come, he thinks about it all the time. And I want to show you an interesting thing. The Rebbi Akiva Eiger speaks about if someone counted Sefiras HaOmer in writing. Writing? Why would someone count? Why do you have to write down today's? The custom was, rabosai, that on a letter, when someone would write a letter, he would write the date, the sefirah. Hayom, today, instead of writing it's five in Iyar, they would write it's the twentieth of sefirah. That's what Rebbi Akiva Eiger means. If someone wrote the sefirah, is it called like he's counting? I saw from Rav Mendel Rimner, the reason for this is not to be masiach daas from Sefiras HaOmer. Not to take your mind constant. I think that's what it means: tmimos tihyena. Not even the counting. It should be by you, tihyena. I think the Bnei Yissaschar says this nekudah, tihyena, it should be by you tmimos. Why? I think, I believe...

Anticipation. The more anticipation and the more cheshek, that's Kabbalas HaTorah. My proof to this is, if you look at the beginning of the parsha of Kabbalas HaTorah, the Ribono Shel Olam had a whole different plan for Kabbalas HaTorah. It would be that Moshe Rabbeinu would come and bring them the Torah. That was it. So when Moshe Rabbeinu speaks to Klal Yisroel, is that what they wanted? No. What did they want? Retzoneinu liros es Malkeinu. We want to see Hashem directly. So the Ribono Shel Olam says, Im kein — Rashi brings it down — im kein, if so, that's what they want? Okay, then we have a whole new plan for Kabbalas HaTorah. We'll go and we'll do it this way. Says Rabbi Yerucham, what do we see from here? We see from here, the way they wanted, that's how Kabbalas HaTorah was. I said the same thing over here too. The hachanah to Kabbalas HaTorah is, I want. How much I long for it, how much I look forward to it. And that is Sefiras HaOmer, looking forward, I look forward to it. And that becomes the yesod of what the Kabbalas HaTorah is. This is this week's parsha where it says, V'usfartem lachem mimochoras haShabbos, sheva Shabbasos temimos tihyena. Okay, we'll stop it here. I wish you all wonderful and beautiful Shavuos. Hatzlacha, next week we'll continue, but this is the lesson for this week's parsha. You've just experienced another Torah class, brought to you by TorahAnytime.com.