Ki Sisa: The Chet HaEgel, Naaseh V’nishma, and Submission to Hashem’s Will

Transcript

This Torah class is brought to you by TorahAnytime.com. Ego is one of the most difficult and perplexing parshiyos and sugyos in the history of Klal Yisroel. And when I say history, I don't mean past history. I mean present history as well. Chazal, the Gemara in Sanhedrin daf kuf yud, Rashi quotes it on the pasuk, Uvayom pokdi ufakadti, that ein lecha peranius sheba l'olam, that whenever there's peronius, whenever there's punishment, the ego has in it its components of the punishment. The ego is part of that punishment, to repay the ego. So it's not just a past history ego. Ego obviously is relevant. Ego has its תוצאות, its lemaaseh today, that every time there's, lo aleinu, tzarah, the ego, the ego. There's, in English we call it the DNA. It has the DNA of the ego. The question, of course, is what is ego? And the question becomes relevant. Because if we understand egel, we can understand, does it apply today? Do we have such a thing as chet egel today? We know the chachamim, the Tannaim, they megarish, they kicked away the taiva for the avodah zarah. There was a time and a place where avodah zarah was a tremendous taiva. The greatest of tzaddikim fell, and they couldn't control themselves. They were attached to this taiva of avodah zarah. The Gemara tells us Menasheh HaMelech. Menasheh was ridiculed by a tanna. Ach, Menasheh, chavereinu, looky, that avodah zarah. He was spoken of ill, and not in the proper kavod for a melech Yisrael. And the reason is because he was davuk in avodah zarah. He was completely lahut, completely running after avodah zarah. Menasheh comes to that tanna in a dream, and he tells him, What do you think, you're so great? The reason why I did avodah zarah was because it was a tremendous yetzer hara. Had you been in my times, you would have run even faster to the avodah zarah. This is Gemara in Brachos. The point being that we don't have the taiva, the lust, the yetzer hara. For Avodah Zarah today. So the question is, does Chet HaEgel apply today to us? Could we fall into Chet HaEgel? Or is it something just in the history of Klal Yisrael? Could a Chet HaEgel happen today? That's the question. And of course the answer is, maybe not in the way it happened then. Maybe we're not going to wake up one morning and make this big statue, an egel, a cow, and start bowing down to the statue. Other countries maybe have such yetzer haras and avodah zaras, but Klal Yisrael definitely doesn't have this yetzer hara anymore. So are we to say Chet HaEgel cannot happen in our times? Or as we would say, lo shayach lanu. Maybe Chet HaEgel has nothing to do with us. And yet, we find Chazal tell us that when we have tzara, when we have punishment, we're still getting from the Chet HaEgel. Choiref, the Chet HaEgel is gone. If the Chet HaEgel is a thing of the past.

If a Chet HaEgel is a history, why would we still have to go through Kaparah for the Chet HaEgel? You know, there's a klal of l'yumsa avos al banim, u'vanim al avosam, that we don't get punished. We don't get punished for the chataim of our forefathers, for the fathers that came before us, unless, the Gemara says, k'she'ochzin ma'aseh avoseihem b'yadeihem. When they carry the ma'aseh avoseihem, the Gemara says that if you hold on to those ma'asim and you keep on doing it, then you can get punished for the past, what your parents did. Now, if we don't have Chet HaEgel, why are we still getting punished? We didn't do the Egel. Our forefathers did the Egel. Our grandfathers did the Egel. When I say forefathers, I don't mean the Avos, but I'm saying our grandfathers in the Midbar made the Egel. So why are we getting punished constantly, generation after generation, for the Chet HaEgel? It has to be k'she'ochzin ma'aseh avoseihem b'yadeihem to get punished for the past. But we just said there's no avodah zarah; we wouldn't do this Egel. All this leads me to say that obviously we do have Chet HaEgel, and unfortunately, yes, we do sin. In Chet HaEgel, but in a different form. If we understood what Chet HaEgel was, what exactly the aveirah is based on, we could somehow understand how, yes, it does apply. And unfortunately, chaval that we taka are over the tenets, the tenets of Chet HaEgel. Let us begin to explain Chet HaEgel. Chet HaEgel is complicated. On one hand, we find, when we read, that it seems like clear avodah zarah. Asu lahem egel maseichah, and they say, Eileh elohecha Yisrael. I mean, how much more of an avodah zarah could you have? What more could have been done to be called an avodah zarah, a yiddish-keit avodah zarah, outright avodah zarah? Yet, on the other hand, we find that the Ribbono Shel Olam was mechaper Klal Yisrael for the Chet HaEgel. Salachti kidvarecha. The Yud-Gimmel Midos. Moshe Rabbeinu was mispallel tachnunim forty days, and the Ribbono Shel Olam was mechaper, Salachti kidvarecha. Yet, by Chet HaMeraglim... The Rabbeino Shom never forgave Chet HaMeraglim. Everybody who was there b'shaas Chet HaMeraglim had to die out, and it was nikva b'chiyul l'doiros that Tisha B'Av will be on the day that they came back with the Meraglim. Why is it that Eigel, which seems much worse than Meraglim, the Rabbeino Shom is mechaper? Meraglim, which seems to be less than Eigel, the Rabbeino Shom is not mechaper. We don't find kaparah for the story of the Meraglim. L'choira, l'choira, if something is much worse than Meraglim, if there was no kaparah for the Meraglim, there should be no kaparah for the Eigel. Now, rabboisai, Eigel seems to have a double chomer, that not only had avodah zarah in it. Chazal tell us, lo asu es haEigel ela l'hatir lahem arayos. That actually the end game for the Eigel was that we should also—

The over arayos. Klal Yisroel wanted gilui arayos. So we have avodah zarah and gilui arayos, which is the two of the most chamur, two of the cardinal aveiros that we have in the Torah: avodah zarah and gilui arayos. Meraglim is not that. Meraglim is lashon hara, okay? Meraglim maybe, in a roundabout way, is kefirah, which means in hashkafah you don't realize that the Ribono Shel Olam is hakel yachol, right? Ki chazak hu mimenu. Chazal tell us that ultimately they were denying the greatness and strength of the Ribono Shel Olam. Yes, you're not chayav misa for saying a statement like that. For doing egel, it's a chiyuv misa. For doing avodah zarah—I'm sorry, gilui arayos—that's a chiyuv misa. Meraglim per se is not a chiyuv misa. Meraglim is a very bad thing to do. Lashon hara is not a chiyuv misa. Nowhere in the Torah does it say that a person who speaks lashon hara is going to have to have him and all the people that were there, that they should become nichras, and that it should be nikval l'doiros, churban and destruction in Klal Yisroel. So why was the Ribono Shel Olam mechaper the egel and not mechaper the meraglim? Avodah zarah, gilui arayos—it's from the chamuros. There's also an interesting Chizkuni, rabosai. Chizkuni says— Aharon HaKohen is going to do avodah zarah. He's going to make an egel. How could there be such a thing? How could Aharon HaKohen make an egel? It's the biggest—it's the worst aveirah, the worst aveirah. Imagine, they talk about the best guy in Lakewood, or if you're in Eretz Yisrael, the best guy in Ponovezh. He made an egel. He made a big avodah zarah. But other than that, gadol hador. You would say that's it. Can't be gadol hador if he made avodah zarah. Yay, he went to the back of the yeshiva there and he made an egel. He made a buda, and he bowed down to the buda, and everybody bowed down to the buda. Chutz mizeh, hu lamdan muflag, yarei Shamayim. What are you talking about? How could Aharon HaKohen be the gadol hador, the Kohen Gadol, if he made an egel? Says the Chizkuni, it's muchach that you can't say that it was an avodah zarah. Can't say. If it was an avodah zarah, a real avodah zarah, Aharon HaKohen couldn't have made it. Kacha omer haChizkuni, v'yesh harbeh rishonim shemedabrim kacha. How could it be? How could it be? The answer is it can't be, and the egel was not a real avodah zarah. You look at the Ramban. Ramban explains that they wanted a certain ruchniyus. Moshe was leaving, and Moshe was the one who was madrich them in aliyah ruchni... And they were afraid that they're losing this. So they wanted to make something that would elevate themselves, to be mizdabek, to be attached to the Rabbeinu Shlolem. So they remembered that when Moshe Rabbeinu went up, they saw the merkavah, the Rabbeinu Shlolem's celestial throne. There's tzuras shor, the tzurah of an ox. So they figured if they make the ox, the golden calf, they'll be mizdabek, they'll be close to the Rabbeinu Shlolem, they'll be somewhat attached to the kisei hakavod. I'm saying it in simple terms. It's a very long, deep, complicated Ramban, but linyaneinu it's good enough to understand that they meant ruchniyus. They didn't mean avodah zarah, avodah zarah bad; avodah zarah good, avodah zarah for the right reasons, avodah zarah with the intentions of getting closer to Hashem and being mizdabek, attached themselves to the Rabbeinu Shlolem. There's a beautiful Beis Halevi that explains that's the pshat in the pasuk when Rabbeinu Shlolem says, Heraf mimeni v'ashmidem, v'e'esecha oyscha l'goy gadol.

A race, Klal Yisroel, I'll destroy them, and you, I'll make into this big nation. From you, Moshe, I'll make the kiyum hahavtachah that I promised the Avos, I'll make a big nation. So Moshe Rabbeinu answers back to Him, Ki amcha hagoy hagadol hazeh. In Vayechal, we say, Ki amcha hagoy hazeh. Rashi explains that Moshe Rabbeinu was telling the Eibishter, not me, but Klal Yisroel. You want the am, the am is not me, amcha. I'm not masking. You want to make a nation because You promised Avraham, not me. Ki amcha, no, only Klal Yisroel. The Beis Halevi is masbir that Moshe Rabbeinu was saying deeper than just, not me, take Klal Yisroel. He was saying amcha, that the reason why they did the chet wasn't because they didn't want to be amcha. They didn't do the eigel because they tried to break away from You. The opposite. Because amcha hagoy hazeh. Because they wanted to be amcha, but they made a mistake. The reason of making the eigel was not to be nisnatek, to be cut away from Hashem. The Yiddish expression, pumfakert, the opposite. Ki amcha hagoy. They did the eigel because they wanted to be amcha, and they wanted to get closer to You. So now we have a new understanding of eigel. Don't think eigel was, Ooh, look at this bad Klal Yisroel, terrible, they're coming and— Obviously, obviously, they wanted to become closer to HaKadosh Baruch Hu. So wait a minute. On one hand we're saying, egel, terrible, yeah, and on the other hand we're saying, egel, wonderful. Is it wonderful? Is it terrible? Which one is it? They meant tremendous kesher with Hashem, they meant. So then wasn't avodah zarah? Yes, it was. So you can come and say it was the wrong thing for not the right intention. For the opposite. It was the wrong thing with the right intentions. Maybe. Maybe. And that's a good question. When a person does the wrong thing for the right intention, is he chayiv such a tremendous onesh? If not for Moshe Rabbeinu begging Hashem to be mochel Klal Yisrael, heref mimeni v'ashmidem. I don't understand. Onesh, shogeg. Make up your mind. On one hand you're telling me, egel, avodah zarah. Nah, it can't be avodah zarah. So we start chipping away. Aharon didn't make an avodah zarah, and the Ramban says, Oh no, of course they meant l'shem Shamayim. So why is Hashem so angry? You want to know, I always thought to myself, they made an egel, yeah? Did they have Torah yet? They didn't have Torah yet, so what could you expect from people who don't have the Torah yet? But to make a mistake, they made a mistake. If they have the Torah, so you can hear. All right, listen. You know, like it says, Lo nitna hasra'ah ella lehavchin bein shogeg l'meizid, and therefore a talmid chacham doesn't need hasra'ah according to one opinion in the Gemara. Why? Because he knows better. Why do you have to warn a person before he does an aveirah? To make sure he understands. The Gemara says a talmid chacham anyway understands, so maybe a talmid chacham doesn't need hasra'ah. So here too, what are you saying? You meant well, but you made a mistake, so you should have known. After the Torah, you can come and tell me, I should have known. I'm a talmid chacham. I learned. But if kodem I learned, before I learned, how could you complain if I make a mistake? If I meant bid, if I meant bid. I hear. See, the meraglim, I believe they meant bid. The meraglim was bechilah l'doros, was hashchasah. It was hashchasah in midos. It was hashchasah in lashon hara. That's hashchasah. Now, of course, lefi madrigasam, you know, maybe if it would be us.

The Rabbeinu Shalom would say, Ah, it's a mitzvah even, what you guys are saying. But in their madreigah, it was hashchasa, that the Ribono Shel Olam is not mechila, that you can't be mochel. Hashchasa is not nitan l'mechila. Egel was a mistake. A mistake is nitan l'mechila. That's why the Eibishter is mochel, the salachti kidvarecha. But then the question becomes the other way around. If it's a mistake, why would Hashem get so angry in the first place? You know, I saw Reb Shimon Shkop, zecher tzaddik livracha, grodner rosh yeshiva, in his hakdamah to Shaarei Yosher, asks a beautiful question. Now, I'm not going to go through the whole hakdamah, but just want to take out one question, because it proves our point. He asks a question: when Moshe Rabbeinu comes down and he sees that they did the egel, why break the luchos? The opposite. Keep the luchos and teach the people not to do avodah zarah. I mean, take the luchos, take the Torah, and teach the people. You expect a person who never learned anything, he doesn't know anything, bur v'am haaretz. What do you expect? He should know, he shouldn't make mistakes, he shouldn't do avodah zarah? You need to make a mistake, he doesn't know. Take the Torah instead of breaking it and teach him. He has a whole arichus over there, I don't want to go into it right now, but the point being, why would HaKadosh Baruch Hu get so angry? Why would HaKadosh Baruch Hu get so angry? I'll tell you what I think the pshat, rabosai, is. There's three parts to egel: their intentions. They meant to get close to Hashem. That could be good. That could be defined as a good part. Then you have the part of the l'maaseh. L'maaseh wasn't good; it was an ego. So what happens if a person does something bad for the right reasons, meaning with the right intentions? It's a good question. Why are we, ma Hashem, why are we being Yidden with shuldikin? We make them so wrong. We make them so wrong. Look, you did the ego. And the answer is, there's a middle point here which has to be addressed. Where does it come from? What is the shoresh of these good intentions? Sometimes a person has good intentions l'shem Shamayim, and sometimes a person has good intentions, but the shoresh of it is bad middos. Of course, I'm going to build Torah, I'm going to do— that's tremendous, yeah. But is it because you care about the Torah, or is it because you care about yourself? Is it because you love Torah, or because you love yourself? I'll give you, you know, in yeshivas I would have given this mashal. Do you build Torah l'shma? You build Torah for your name, that you should have a maamad, you should have a kavod. For balabatish olam, I would say a little different. You know how I would say it? A person eats Shabbos food. Is it because he loves the Shabbos, or because he loves himself, and therefore he loves to eat on Shabbos? Now, the eating on Shabbos is the same. Both people are eating on Shabbos, but one is eating from a love of Shabbos, and the other one is eating from a love of himself. So every maiseh, you have to go into the shoresh. Both of them are eating for Shabbos. If you had to write in a paper, eating seudas Shabbos, yeah. Will you get reward? Yeah, you get reward eating on Shabbos. We have to find that what. The one who eats on Shabbos for Shabbos and only because of Shabbos, that's unbelievable. That's maasim which the shoresh of it is tahor. Then you have maasim which the shoresh of it is ani. It's about me. I'm thinking about myself. They say over from the Gaon that his talmid, Reb Chaim Volozhin, came to him that we have to build a yeshiva in Volozhin. We have to build a yeshiva. Why? Because the...

They're not learning. The old days, bachurim would learn by a rav, by the local rav, and they were matzliach in Torah that way. They're falling away, the bachurim. So the Gra said to him, I hear. Come back to me. I'm not so convinced that you have to make the yeshiva. Come back to me. He came back to him six, to a year later, six months to a year later, and he said the same thing: Rebbe, the bachurim have to make the yeshiva. Yeah, make the yeshiva. So he asked him, Rebbe, why six months ago did you tell me not to make it, told me to wait, and now I come, nothing changed. I said the same point over again. I just said that we're losing the bachurim. What do you see now different? He said, It's not the bachurim that are different; you're different. When you came originally, you had a lot of hitlahavut. You came with a lot of... So I thought you're doing it for yourself maybe a little bit. Of course you're claiming and saying, klapei chutz, your banner is, 'L'shem Shamayim, Torah.' Where does that l'shem Shamayim come from? Is it about the Torah, or is it about you? You want to build a yeshiva for your kavod. Now I see you came, you're a little less hitlahavut. It's not about you anymore. Now you really mean the Torah. Oh, go, go, go, go make the yeshiva. Eigo. Yes. According to the Ramban, and according to many Rishonim, they wanted Shechinah. They wanted the Rabbeinu Shlolam, yeah? But the shoresh of it was taivah. It wasn't the Rabbeinu Shlolam. They spoke the Rabbeinu Shlolam. They spoke ruchniyus. They spoke kisei hakavod, moiridik, inyonim gvoyim me'ad me'od, in Yiddish, heichin yonim. Unbelievable. But where did it come from? What was the shoresh of that ratzon, that want, that will to...? And the answer is taivah. I'll prove it to you. Prove it to you. If you look at Rashi, Eileh elohecha Yisrael. So the lashon of the pasuk is eileh, plural, elohecha Yisrael. Now, elohecha is singular. Eileh is plural. So how could you have eileh, plural, elohecha? It should be eileh, eloheichem Yisrael. Says Rashi, elahus harbeh, ivu, ivu lahem. You know what the word ivu? Ivu means taivah. They desired. They desired. Ivu. It was a personal taivah. That's what Chazal mean, that they did the egel l'hatil lahem arayos. It was about taivas arayos also. I thought you talked about Hashem. Didn't you talk about Hashem and maaseh merkavah and the kisei hakavod? How did avodah zarah come? How did gilui arayos come in here? And the answer is, gilui arayos is taiva. Sometimes, the avodah zarah, even if you're saying, I mean Hashem, I mean Hashem, I mean... it's masked. It's masking the taiva of avodah zarah. Throughout history, by the way, rabosai, whenever they have movements of avodah zarah, you go into it and you'll find that there's tremendous taiva of gilui arayos. All the cults of avodah zarah, all the people who are heading those cults are shutuf in wild and beyond comprehensible gilui arayos. Believers, something which you... beli cheshbon. Gilui arayos mishuneh, mishuneh.

Because the yesod of it is, you're talking lofty ideas. But the shoresh of it sometimes, the shoresh is taiva. And taiva could mean taiva of giluy arayos. Now again, lehavdil, I don't mean to compare the dardea to, rachmana litzlan, the cults, and that's not what I'm trying to get at. But in dakus, in the tenets, in the shorashim, when it's not l'shem Shamayim completely, and it's about the person, then it's taiva, which actually has in it shorashim of giluy arayos, which is the ultimate of taivos. The ultimate of taiva is giluy arayos. So avodah zarah, which comes from evil, evil taiva, is actually l'hatil lahem giluy arayos. And I'll show you where in the pasuk it's pretty clear. You know, the Ribono Shel Olam tells Moshe to go down, Lech reid, ki shiches amcha. Asu lahem eigel maseichah. Now there's two things I want to show you. When you want to say eigel, you don't have to say lahem. When someone makes an avodah zarah, it has nothing to do with lahem. Asu eigel maseichah. They did an avodah zarah. They made an eigel. Why does it have to say the word lahem? What is the emphasis on the word lohem? And I'll tell you even more. If you know taimei hakra, trop — in Yiddish we call it trop, taimei hakra — it's asu lohem, zakef katon, stop, egel maseicha. If you mean asu lohem egel maseicha, it's one sentence then: asu lohem egel maseicha. And the answer is asu lohem. What egel maseicha? It wasn't about the egel. It was about asu lohem egel maseicha. Again, asu egel maseicha. You don't need the word lohem. You don't need it. Asu egel maseicha. Now in the dikduk, it also is asu lohem. Lohem is stop. If you mean to just say they made for themselves an egel, it should be one sentence: asu lohem egel maseicha. It doesn't say it. That's not how it's read. It's asu lohem egel maseicha. What do you mean? It's not a stop. And the answer is lohem. That's the hadgasha. That's the emphasis. They made for themselves. You can make an egel thinking, I'm doing it for the Eibishter. Ivu, they did it for their own taiva. It's not that they made an egel. It's that they made an egel because they had a taiva. It was to fulfill their own need. So it's asu lohem. When somebody eats, you could say he ate for himself. Bishvil atzmo. That's asu lohem hana'ah, egel maseichah. It wasn't about egel, what we think, ooh, the Shechinah, Hashem. Now you understand? Asu lohem, not asu egel maseichah. Egel maseichah, maybe they meant l'shem Shamayim; they didn't mean l'shem Shamayim. It looked and it sounded, and in their minds even they might have thought they're doing it l'shem Shamayim. But the Ribono Shel Olam, who knows deeper, who knows what ha'adam yireh la'einayim, v'Elokim yireh la'levav understood asu. Who did they do it for? Lohem. They did it for their taiva, for their hana'ah, egel maseichah.

I want to show you something interesting. It's clear in the Chazal, and I'm not going to bring all of them, but there are many Chazalin, and we'll just bring a few just to bring out the point that show us that Chet Adam Harishon has to do with the egel. And the scenario, the sequence, excuse me, the sequence of history is Chet Adam Harishon, then by Matan Torah, Klal Yisrael fixed Chet Adam Harishon. They fixed the chet of the Eitz Hadaas. And then when they did the egel again, they went back to the matzav, the metzius of what it was like by Chet Adam Harishon. That's what happened by egel. And then came the Mishkan to be mesaken, to fix Chet ha'egel, to bring them back to what it was like Adam Harishon kodem hachet. This is mefurash v'yadua in all the sefarim, and it's based on Chazal, and I'll tell you some of those Chazal. Chazal tell us, Cherus charus al haluchos. What does that mean? The luchos was ksav Elokim charus. What does charus mean? Al tikri charus, the Medrash Shemos Rabbah, mem aleph, os aleph, don't read it charus al haluchos, but cheirus. What is cheirus? They were free, paska zuhamasam from the— The, I guess, the malach hamaves that went into every person after chet of Eitz Hadaas that causes misa, now they didn't have it. By Matan Torah, they got healed, healed. Nisrapu. They became healed from this zehumah that they received by chet, that people receive from chet Adam Harishon. That's charus al luchos; al tikri charus ela cheirus, free. So Chazal are telling us, ki'ilu it was mesukan. They fixed by Matan Torah chet Adam Harishon. The Gemara in Avodah Zarah, daf hei amud aleph, tells us that when they did the eigel, they went back and they received again zehumasan. And that's what the pasuk means: I thought, atem elokim, achin ka'Adam temusun. No, you're just like Adam Harishon that did the chet of Eitz Hadaas, and therefore now you're going to die. You're going to go back to the situation of Adam by the chet. It's the Gemara in Avodah Zarah, daf hei amud aleph. Yecha boysai, Eitz Hadaas, then luchos, Kabbalas HaTorah, charus. They went back, cheirus, from the zehumah that they received from Eitz Hadaas, and then it went back to the way it was of Adam achar hachet, achin ka'Adam temusun, that you'll just be like Adam, because I thought you were like malachim. Uvnei Elyon kulchem. That was by Matan Torah. They said, Naaseh v'Nishma. They were like malachim. Migila raz zeh, malachei hashares mishtamshim bo. They were like malachim. Achi kadam, to musi, going back to be like Adam. Comes the Mishkan, like the Rishonim tell us, and that's to be mesaken the chet ha'egel. You notice in this week's parsha we have chet ha'egel. So what do we have right away? Machatzis hashekel, kofer, lechaper al nafshoseichem. Many Rishonim learn, what's the lechaper al nafshoseichem? Egel. So the collecting of the shekalim to build the Mishkan, Rashi learns they built the adanim, the foundation of the Mishkan, the sockets where the beams of the Mishkan went into, was the shekalim, and that's the lechaper al nafshoseichem according to many Rishonim because of egel, the Mishkan was a tikkun. We find later, we're going to explain it, im yirtzeh Hashem, later on this year, that parah adumah becomes a kaparah for the egel. We're going to discuss that also. So what do we have? We have over here an interesting thing, that Adam HaRishon's chet revolves itself—I'm sorry, the word is evolves.

It evolves itself through egel. It comes back again. Chozer v'ne'or, in lashon of Chazal, in the egel. What's the connection? Very simple. Adam HaRishon sees eitz hadaas, b'yom acholcha mimenu vayisker kElohim yodea tov v'ra. Eitz hadaas. Tremendous. Tremendous. You look at it and you say, wow, if I only ate from the eitz hadaas, yodea Elokim, you would be mamash like Elokim yodea tov v'ra. That's how much we all know daas means to connect. Vayeida Adam es Chavah ishto, and that means what? Chibur. Yediah means chibur; it's a Rambam. Yedias Hashem means to be mischaber to the Ribono Shel Olam, to connect. So he wanted to connect. So when he ate the eitz hadaas, was it a good thing or a bad thing? But he wanted to connect with the Eibishter. He wanted ruchniyus. And the answer is, it's still not a good thing. Why? Haminah eitz asher tzivisicha lo sochal mimenu achol. I told you not that way. I told you not to. When Chavah eats from the eitz hadaas, it says clearly in the pasuk, Vechitav hu le'einayim. Chinechmad hu le'einayim, vechitav hu — it was nechmad and taavah. Wait a minute. I thought you said that he ate the eitz hadaas because he wanted ruchniyus. But then we say that it's taiva. And you know what the answer is, rabosai? It's both. What was the egel? The egel was the same thing. Whoa, merkavah, shor means we're attached to the kisei hakavod. It's like yodea Elokim tov v'ra. You'll know, and you'll be close to the Ribono Shel Olam. You'll have tremendous hasagos. Yet what's the shoresh of it? Nechmad, taiva. In the mind you can think Hashem. In the mind you can think Hashem. But the shorashim are taiva. And the taiva becomes, so how do I know? How is a person supposed to know if in his head he thinks Hashem, and in his heart, maybe deep down, it's not 100% l'shem shamayim but taiva? And the answer is, haminaeitz asher tzivisicha. Listen to the tzivui of Hashem. You do what you're told. You have to be mizbatel. You have to be mevatel yourself to the tzivui of Hashem. Egel was an evolvement. It evolved into the egel. How was Kabbalas HaTorah the tikkun? And the answer is because Klal Yisrael said naaseh v'nishma. What does naaseh v'nishma mean? Naaseh v'nishma. I'm mevatel myself completely. Naaseh v'nishma. I'm mevatel myself completely. Whatever you tell me I'm going to do. Ratzon Hashem, tzivui Hashem, that's it. Oh, that was a tikkun for the min ha'etz asher tzivisicha losochal mimenu achalta. What happens? They did eigel, which is the exact opposite of that. They made cheshbonos. They made cheshbonos, ruchni cheshbonos. But it's not what I told you. I told you not to do this. Comes the Mishkan and corrects eigel. How does Mishkan correct eigel? The yesod of the Mishkan is ka'asher tzivah Hashem es Moshe. Eighteen times in these parshiyos it says the building of the Mishkan was ka'asher tzivah Hashem es Moshe. Tzivui Hashem. They weren't allowed to deviate an inch, a centimeter, away from what Hashem said. When you had to make the begadim, what does it say? You had to do re'eh, k'tavnisam. Everything had to be exactly the way it was.

And exactly the way he was told. You know, it says in the beginning of this week's parsha, Re'eh, karasi shem Bezalel, Uri ben Chur, va'amalei oto ruach chochmah. You know how smart Bezalel was? Bezalel was brilliant, and the Ribono Shel Olam added chochmah lichachamim. The Ribono Shel Olam added more wisdom. Tell me, what did he need all this wisdom for if anyway it was kasher tzivah Hashem? The pasuk says clearly. It says clearly in the pasuk. Yeah. I call Bezalel, yeah, I call Bezalel, and I tell him to make all this. You got regular, regular Chumash, rabosai. I have to go through all the Rishonim here. Here. Vayedaber Hashem el Moshe, Re'eh karasi b'shem Bezalel ben Uri ben Chur, va'amalei oto b'chochmah uvina daas. Yet what does it say over here clearly? It says, Va'asu eis kol asher tzivisicha. Uvlev kol chacham lev nasati chochmah. Va'asu eis kol asher tzivisicha. So what do you need the chochmah for? Take someone who follows instructions. You know, you ever see, there's the builder who owns the construction company, and then there's the workers. Who are the workers? Hired for a few dollars an hour, yeah? Who is the construction guy? What makes him the construction man? And the answer is because he has the chochmah, the blueprint on how to do it. What about the people who are doing that? They must be—what do you mean? He's just sitting in his office; they're doing the building. What's the answer? They're just following orders. They're just following the rules, the instructions. So what does it mean, Uvlev kol chacham lev nasati chochmah, va'asu eis kol asher tzivisicha? And the teretz, rabosai, is because that's Mishkan. Don't use your own chochmah. I gave you wisdom. You could have done so many creative things in the Mishkan. The answer is, I don't want that. What do I want? Kol asher tzivisicha. And again, as bigdei mizbeach ha'olam, bigdei haKodesh, Hashem and haMishkan, kechol asher tzivisicha yaasu. He would say, Why do I have to have all this brilliant builder? Who needs it? And the Torah says, to teach. You know what Mishkan is? Yes! The most creative mind, the most creative mind, Chochmah. No. Kechol asher tzivisi. Because Mishkan is belicheshbeinus, tzivui Hashem. You know, the eigel, they also had cheshbonos. They also had cheshbonos. But it's not what I told them to do. Adam HaRishon also had cheshbonos. He had daas elyon. He wanted to know toiv v'ra, like the Ribono Shel Olam's chochmah. But it's not asher tzivisicha. It's not what I told you to do. That's why Matan Torah, which is naaseh v'nishma, is the tikkun. And that's why, b'shaas Matan Torah, it's a peledike thing, how in the chuppah of Matan Torah, b'shaas maaseh, saru mahar min haderech. How come it didn't take a day, two days, three days? In the chuppah itself, the Gemara in Shabbos, Pei Ches, says, Alu v'ka...

שזינסא בחופצה, in the chupah itself, in the chupah itself. Because that was the nisayon, the yetzer hara against the naaseh v'nishma. The yesod of Kabbalas HaTorah was naaseh v'nishma. The maaseh Satan was eigel, because it was everything against naaseh v'nishma. What was naaseh v'nishma? Hisbatlus legamrei to the retzon of Hashem, completely, totally subordinated to retzon Hashem. So what was the yetzer hara? What was the hasatas hameisit to make an eigel? That's what he did. He went—what did he do? He made Moshe Rabbeinu like he died. He wanted them to do an eigel. He wanted them to do an eigel because he wanted them to undo the naaseh v'nishma, just like he wanted Adam and Chava to undo the naaseh v'nishma. And the tikkun was Mishkan, which is naaseh v'nishma. And that's why Parah Adumah, rabosai, is also a kaparah, tovah ha'egel, v'tekane'ach achar habaas, to clean up for the eigel, because what is Parah Adumah? Chok. There's no understanding to it. The Eibishter said, It's chok. We don't understand what it is. What? But the Eibishter—gezeiras Melech, He said. Chok. Chok is a tikkun. Egel. Because Egel was cheshbon. Chet ha'meraglim was cheshbon. Naaseh v'nishma was a tikkun because it's not cheshbon, it's kabbalah. And Parah Adumah is chok, kabbalah. I'll tell you a meiridige vort, rabosai. Women have Rosh Chodesh as their Yom Tov. The Tur brings down from his brother—well, actually it's even before that, Tosafos in Megillah, chaf-ches amud beis, Rashi quotes a Tosafos—that the women, Rashi quotes Tosafos, huh, in Megillah chaf-ches amud beis, that—b'pi meiri, oh, b'pi meiri, he says, not Tosafos, excuse me, b'pi meiri—that it says over there that the women didn't want to give the gold, because Aharon said, Give the gold to make the Egel, and the women didn't want to give the gold. So because of this they have Rosh Chodesh. First of all, what does it mean that—why Rosh Chodesh? What does Rosh Chodesh have to do with—why is Rosh Chodesh the present, the gift, for not giving their gold in jewelry? But the truth is, we have to really work on this Chazal that the women didn't give the gold, because it says in the pasuk that Aharon said to Moshe, I told them to give the gold. Says Rashi, did they or didn't they give the gold? So let's look at the Rashi. So Rashi... Vayisparku... Kal am, they gave. Who gave? So Rashi uses a lashon over here, vayisparku. Here, but that's in the shechem; it's in the previous Rashi. Amaru b'liboi, ha'nashim v'hayeladim chasim ad al tachshiteihem. The yeladim and the nashim, they're chasim. They care very much about their jewelry. Shema yis'akev hadavar, they're not going to want to give it. So, a stall for time. I'm going to stall for time. U'v'sof kach yavo Moshe. Veheim lo himtinu, u'parku me'al atzman. What does that mean? Does that mean that the women, or the men took it off the women? Or, we could say a third pshat: the men took it off themselves, parku me'al atzman, instead of taking it from the women who would say no, so they gave their own. It's not clear how to learn this Rashi. Some learn the Rashi, parku me'al atzman means that the men gave it. Some learn that the women actually gave. They learn the Rashi, parku me'al atzman. If you look at the girsa, there's another girsa, mi'shel atzman. Mi'shel atzman means that—

They gave their own, the men gave. But if you have the girsa, u'parku me'al atzman, maybe it's referring to the women. So who gave, the men or the women? Now if the women gave, so what does Rashi mean in Megillah, chavches amud beis? Rashi says clearly, the Ramaslo Rish Chodesh. He says over there that Rosh Chodesh, women don't do melacha because it's their Yontif. Why? Because of this cheshbon that they didn't want to give, which is a pirka d'Rabbi Eliezer, was Michol bat Balaam. The husband said give, and they said, No, I don't want to give. So which one is it? So if you learn this Rashi, rabosai, that the men gave, okay, the men gave, the women didn't want to give, and that's Rashi in Megillah. But if you learn, parku me'al atzman literally means an atzman is actually nekeivah, atzman, from them. Zachar is what? Parku me'al atzman, right? Are you baal dikduk in Hebrew? What's atzman? Nun? Nekeivah, right? Chayra. I know I said this over in Lakewood, people were all upset, Well, Rashi means that the men. Yeah, but the word atzman is with a nun. Nun is nekeivah. It's very possible that the women gave. So which one is it? Is it like this Rashi here, or is it like in the Rashi in Megillah? And I think the pshat is like this, rabosai. Aharon said to give. Aharon was the gadol hador. The women heard that Aharon said to give, parku. We give. But to who? The Pirkei d'Rabbi Eliezer, and that's what Rashi quotes over there, the husbands came and say, Give. They don't want to give. Michu b'baaleihen. We'll give, but not to you. You, I started to realize something's wrong. I'm ready to give. It's not about me not wanting to give the gold. I'm ready to give, because Aaron said to give. His batlus to the das Torah. That's why they got Rosh Chodesh. Let me tell you about Rosh Chodesh. You know what Rosh Chodesh is? The Siforno tells us, if you take out a Mikraos Gedolos Chumash, you'll see a beautiful Siforno, rabosai. The Siforno says, What is Rosh Chodesh? What is it? Rosh Chodesh is a tremendous Yom Tov, because it symbolizes that Klal Yisroel goes after the levana, and it doesn't go after the sun. What is the maila of the levana, and why is it that Klal Yisroel has its maila that it goes after the levana and not the sun? Says the Siforno that the levana resembles the hatzlacha of Klal Yisroel. Just trying to—oh, here it is. Parshas Bamidbar, Pinchas, chof-ches yud aleph. He says that the maila of Klal Yisroel is that it's like the levana. That's the lashon of the sheheim asidin lischadesh kemoisa. We compare, even in Kiddush Levana, we say Klal Yisroel is like the levana. She says because the levanah doesn't have or atzmi, doesn't have its own light. Its light comes from the sun. So too Klal Yisrael doesn't have its own. Everything comes from something bigger, and that is the Ribono Shel Olam. Just like the levanah gets its light from the chama, so too Klal Yisrael gets its hatzlachah, it gets its chiyus, it gets its entity and its koach to exist because of the Ribono Shel Olam. Read it inside. Go ahead. Zogt the Siforno. Talks about the Yom Tov of Rosh Chodesh. What is the Yom Tov of Rosh Chodesh? Zogt the Siforno, Vetaam minhagim zeh, ki ama matzlachas Yisrael b'olam hazeh hi b'tzad mah? Domeh l'yeriach. Because the hatzlachah of Klal Yisrael in this world is like the yareach. Why? Asher ein lo b'atzmo or klal, zulas mah shetekabel mizulasah. Pshat? Klal Yisrael also is dependent on the Ribono Shel Olam. They're mizbatel. You know, the levanah went and said—

Ein shtei melachim mishtamshim b'keser echad. Is it me or is it the son? So the Ribono Shel Olam went and said, Okay, you levanah get smaller. We know that Rosh Chodesh is a kaparah. Chazal tell us, who is it a kaparah for? For the Ribono Shel Olam, al shemi'ati es halevanah. And they all ask the kasha: the Ribono Shel Olam needs a kaparah? It's His creation. He does what He wants with His creation. And the answer is gargeshmak. The Ribono Shel Olam is teaching the levanah. The Ribono Shel Olam is teaching the levanah that in this world, when you're mevatel yourself, when in this world it's not to be a melech, it's to be a munhag. Tell me, did Klal Yisrael—did the levanah get punished, or did the levanah get the biggest prize it could have ever gotten? And that is that Klal Yisrael follows the levanah. When the levanah became small, was it a punishment? Was it a bad thing for the levanah? It's a good thing for the levanah. Al shemi'ati es halevanah. The Ribono Shel Olam is saying, Bring a kaparah. We don't mean a kaparah for chet. It's a korban. Klal Yisrael eventually is also going to have the same ma'alah, al shemi'ati es halevanah. The Klal Yisroel is going to be the keser katan, the melech katan, so to speak, which gets its ohr from the Ribono Shel Olam, the Melech Gadol. Of course, ein shnei melachim mishtamshim b'keser echad. So the Ribono Shel Olam is saying, good, so become smaller. And that's a maila, not a chisaron. So Klal Yisroel is going to make a yontif out of that. That's what the Seforno means. Klal Yisroel is going to make a yontif on the miy'utti es halevanah. What's the levanah? The levanah is that it gets all its ohr from the chamah. So too Klal Yisroel gets all its ohr from the Ribono Shel Olam. With this, rabosai, we understand egel. Egel was they couldn't be mizbatel themselves. They couldn't make themselves under. You know, there's a very famous question. What was the havamina to kill Klal Yisroel and destroy them because of the egel? What was the havamina? And this is really going back to the original question I asked you. On one hand, there was teshuvah. On the other hand, the Ribono Shel Olam wanted to destroy them. So why destroy them if they're making a mistake, which was really the question I began to ask you originally? They made a mistake. Tell me, if a person makes avodah zarah, not by mistake, even on purpose, there's no teshuvah? There's teshuvah. Why didn't we come and say, you know what, do teshuva? So someone is saying that it was nischadesh over here teshuva. Teshuva becomes a parsha after the story of the eigel. You're right. There was teshuva, but not before the eigel, because of the eigel. So you can't ask a kasha, let them do teshuva. The Siforno gives a different teretz. The Siforno says the Ribono Shel Olam Himself, כביכול, tells me why there's no teshuva, and the answer is, Ki am k'shei oref herevni vashmidem, ki am k'shei oref, says the Siforno on the pasuk, ki am k'shei oref, so they can't do teshuva, because they don't listen to moichichim. They don't listen to anybody. So what does that mean? That they're not mevatel. They're not subordinate. The Ribono Shel Olam is saying, you know what I see in Chet HaEgel? They can't be mevatel themselves. They think they're right. Naaseh v'nishma, be mevatel, subordinate yourself. They couldn't keep it. Chazal tell us, a moiredike thing.

Saru maher min haderech. Do you know how long it took? So you thought that Moshe Rabbeinu was up 40 days, and then when they saw after 40 days that he's not coming back down, that's when they went off the derech. That's how you learn, right? That's how everybody learns, right? Forty days, says the Medrash on the pasuk, Saru maher min haderech. Not only did it take 40 days, it didn't even take one day. While they were saying, Rebbei oimer, Rebbei says, while they were saying, Naaseh v'nishma, they already had in their mind that they're going to do the eigel. It's a Medrash. Rebbei, Rebbei oimer. While they said Naaseh v'nishma, they were going to do the eigel. Rebbei, Rebbei oimer. Hang out the Medrash, Rebbei oimer. I'll tell you even more. There's a Tosefta in Bava Kamma, perek zayin, os gimmel, halacha gimmel. The Tosefta says they were kegonvim daas hamakom. They did geneivas daas. They came outwardly and they said, Naaseh v'nishma, yeah, hoo-hoo. But inside, v'naaseh v'nishma, they had no havamina of doing anything. And like the Medrash tells us, Mem-beis, the old one, Mem-beis, this right here, this kisison, Saru maher min haderech, asu lahem eigel maseichah. What does maher mean? Maher doesn't mean right away. Maher means, Gite v'yadei boy echad, at the same moment. Okay, you want me to read it? Read it. Sagt the Medrash, Reb Meir oimer, af lo yoym echad haya. It wasn't even one day. Ela hayu omdim b'Sinai, v'amru bfihem naaseh v'nishma, v'libam haya mechavein la'avodas kochavim. No. What's that? They said. They said that were fake. I don't understand something. For tzarah? You say naaseh v'nishma, and not only that, I don't understand another thing. The Gemara tells us when they said naaseh v'nishma, the Ribbono Shel Olam sent down malachim with ksarim, with crowns to put on their heads. And he said, Wow, like the malachei hashares. What are you talking about? Ribbono Shel Olam knows what's in the person's heart. Adam yireh l'einayim, v'Elokim yireh la'levav. So he didn't know that inside they were thinking avodah zarah? What's going on? What's—? You're saying a tremendous yesod. You think egel means they just went to the backyard and they bowed down to a Buddha? Chas v'shalom. What are you talking about? How can it be that they said naaseh v'nishma? U'voto rega, and in that moment they were thinking, egel. What does that mean? And how did the Ribono Shel Olam give them ksar for the naaseh v'nishma? And how could you be goynev daas hamakom? The teretz, rabosai, is everything we spoke. Klapei chutz, they had the biggest ultimate kavanos of getting close to the Ribono Shel Olam, getting close to the Ribono Shel Olam. What was the shoresh? How much was the naaseh v'nishma? How complete was it? How deep was it? How much was it b'lev shalem, b'heskem legamrei? And the answer is not a hundred percent. That's what it means, they mechavin l'avodah zarah. Avodah zarah doesn't mean avodah zarah like we think avodah zarah. Avodah zarah doesn't mean they went to church. That's not what it means. Naaseh v'nishma, the opposite of naaseh v'nishma, not being mevatel yourself, is avodah zarah. You know what avodah zarah is? I want to tell you about it. Why would a person bow down?

And you know what the answer is? It doesn't make sense. But what does make sense, he can't be mevatel himself to the Ribono Shel Olam. When a person can't be mevatel himself, so you know what happens? He looks for other things. He looks for different avenues of avodah because he can't do what Hashem said. Hashem said, Anochi Hashem Elokecha. So as a merida in that, you go do avodah zarah. Does it make sense? No, it doesn't make sense. But the merida makes sense. The inability to be tachas shilton HaKadosh Baruch Hu. You know, by Miraglim—I'm sorry, by the eigel it says clearly in Devarim, Hiktzafta es Hashem Elokecha bamidbar. It says clearly about the eigel, What mamrim heyisem im Hashem. You know, mamrim is usually against. It's not im. When you're a mamre, you're mamre against. Why does it use the lashon mamrim heyisem im Hashem Elokecha? And the answer, rabosai, is there's something called a mamrim against. Klal Yisrael was me—outwardly, Hashem, what are you talking about? But the mamrim heyisem was im Hashem Elokecha, together. A person could be outwardly with Hashem, mamrim b'rafel pikhei mamrim. Why? He's not mevatel himself legamrei to the ratzon Hashem. If a person is mevatel himself legamrei to the ratzon Hashem, this is what it is. Chassid Yaavetz says, you know why the noshim didn't fall? They had emunah peshutah. Emunah peshutah. Emunah peshutah. I don't—Rabbeinu Shalom, you say, I do. You didn't say, I don't do. He's batel. You know, it's interesting, the whole inyan of chosson and kallah about batel Torah, it's about his batelus. Why are we like a kallah? A kallah is mishubed, and she's mevatel herself completely to the baal, to be koneh to the baal. That's called his batelus. That's she'aluvah kallah shezinsa bechupasah. What do Chazal—Chazal say, a me'orer dike yesod. When does the shibud begin? When does the shibud begin by a kallah? In the chuppah, right? There's kiddushin, so there's chiyuv. But when does the shibud machnis l'toch beisah? He brings— that's chuppah. Chuppah is in the shibud. Could you imagine under a chuppah? Imagine, imagine under a chuppah, you read the kesubah. Why do you read the kesubah? The kesubah is the agreement between the husband and the wife. So he agrees that he's gonna be mefarnes, and she agrees to be a good wife, and so on and so forth, right? And then she turns around and she says, Ah, what good wife. Under the chuppah, imagine, under the chuppah, good wife. By me, you're gonna suffer like a— what? Good wife. She's gonna clean. Who's gonna— what are you talking about? Cook? What are you— That's egel in the chuppah. What is egel? Not shibud. Ani lo meshubed. Ani lo mitchayev. He's chayavus. Aluvah kalah shezinsa. It's the biggest zoyna in the chuppah, lehagid sheani lo meshubed. You know, where do we learn kesubah from? You know where we learn kesubah from? From Matan Torah. The Torah is like the kesubah. It's brought down in the Shibolei HaLeket that all the halachos of chuppah are learned from Kabbalas HaTorah. The chassan goes to the kalah, the Ribbono Shel Olam went out, and it's all from— it's all brought down in the Shibolei HaLeket. The kesubah is the Torah. Just like we read the kesubah under the chuppah, yeah? So we read the Anochi Hashem Elokecha asher hotzeisicha— by Matan Torah we read Anochi Hashem Elokecha, because that's the kesubah. Imagine why.

While that's happening, you know what the kallah is saying? Lo, Anochi Hashem Elokecha, Ela Elokei Yisrael. You're gonna be a good wife to me? To you? No, to that guy. Under the chuppah, imagine the rav, Havali l'into, you'll be my wife, and you'll be keguvrin, and you'll do, and you'll be meshubed to me. And the wife turns around and goes, To who? To him? What are you talking about? To that guy over there? Haluva kallah shezinsa b'chuppasa. This, rabosai, is because egel is not meshubed. I'm not meshubed. I'm meshubed to what I think and what I want. You know, I was thinking to myself, rabosai, an interesting point. It says that the egel began with the word zeh. Like he says, Zeh ha'ish Moshe, lo yadati meh hayah lo. It's a medrash, Tiyalkut Shimoni, perek d'Rebbi Kahana, and therefore they got punished with the word zeh. Why? Al zeh hayah dovel libeinu, al eileh chashku eineinu. La'asid lavo, HaKadosh Baruch Hu will be menachem them, ki zeh Elokeinu kivinu lo, v'yoshi'einu. So zeh by the egel, zeh ba'al zeh hayah dovel libeinu, the churban, and zeh, zeh Hashem kivinu lo, v'noshiach comes. Zeh. I mean, that's the egel. The egel starts with the word zeh. You know the Teretz, rabosai, it's a vad. It starts with the word zeh. Tell me, when you want to talk about Moshe Rabbeinu, yeah, what does the word zeh mean? I don't even know what it means. Ki zeh ha'ish Moshe? What does it mean? Ah, this guy Moshe, that's it. That's where egel begins, the lack of his batlus, the lack of his batlus. Zulz, not to be misbatel. Ki zeh, that's it. And that's pshat, also, al zeh yadavel li beinu, al eileh choshchu eineinu. What does choshchu eineinu mean? It became dark. What do you mean, after the churban it became dark? What? Al Har Tzion sheshamem. What does Har Tzion mean? What does it refer to, the Har Tzion? Are you referring to the Beis Hamikdash? Just talk the Beis Hamikdash. What do you mean Har Tzion? You know, besides for the Beis Hamikdash, there was a tremendous, what do you call that, traffic of Torah. The Sanhedrin, where did they sit? They sat on the Lishkas Hagazis on Har Tzion. They sat there. As a matter of fact, ki miTzion teitzei Torah. Tzion, what is Tzion referring to? It says, dvar Hashem miYerushalayim. So what's Tzion? Tzion is Har Tzion, Har Tzion, the Apelta, right? Al eileh choshchu eineinu, that the Sanhedrin, al Tzion sheshamem. There's no more Sanhedrin. And you know what caused that? When you said, Zeh ha'ish Moshe. You said, Zeh ha'ish Moshe. You mevatel. We took away the Sanhedrin from you. This, ein lecha dor. There's no dor that doesn't have a little bit of the eigel. Why was the Sanhedrin taken away and the teretz is—you want to know something interesting? The Gemara actually tells us the Sanhedrin was before the Churban taken away. Forty years before the Churban, the Gemara says already the Sanhedrin weren't sitting. You know why? That has to do with ein lecha dor. The shoreshim of eigel was in every dor. That's why we're not mechabed talmidei chachamim properly. That's why we're not mevatel ourselves. Why not? He knows more than us. The talmid chacham is greater than—why not? Why do we have such a hard time to be mevatel ourselves? And the teretz is because we can't be—I'm kishoirif. We're not mevatel l'mechichim. That's what it means. Heref mimeni va'ashmidem. I want to destroy them. Why do I want to destroy them? I want to destroy them because they're kishoirif. What does kishoirif says, the sefer? They don't listen. They're not mevatel themselves. They don't have hisbatlus to the gedolim, and memeila not to the Eibishter. That was eigel, kishoirif. Zeh ha'ish Moshe. Memeila, al zeh yadav libeinu, alei lechashchu eineinu. When Moshiach comes, what do we say? Zeh Hashem kivinu lo.

We were waiting for the zeh to be mevatel herself. Zeh Hashem kivinu lo. We're waiting to be mevatel ourselves. Hashem, zeh, only. Yeah, Hashem, only Hashem. Zeh Hashem kivinu lo, v'yoshi'einu. Mevatel ourselves completely to the Ribono Shel Olam. This, rabosai, explains a lot of things. If you give me a few moments, I'll tell you. These are things you're not going to hear anywhere else, so give me a few more moments. You know, one of the things that happened by Egel, the Yalkut Shimoni tells us, nigzer gezeirah that Torah is going to be learned from difficulty, from tirud and tirda and bilbul and shibud. Difficulty, tzaar. Torah has to be learned difficult because of Egel. So, Yalkut Shimoni, right here. V'oysa sha'ah nigzerah. Why? An onesh? It's a punishment? It's not mashma in the Medrash it's a punishment. It's mashma that because of Egel, it had to be this way. From now on, this is how Torah is learned. Why? As a matter of fact, Chazal even say that because it is tzaar, when Mashiach comes, you'll get double the reward. So it's mashma we're not trying to punish you, but lfakeach, we're trying to double the reward. I want to tell you over another shtikel Chazal. There's a Yerushalmi in Taanis, perek daled, halacha hei, that says that the luchos were shnayim ochzin b'taalus. What does that mean? Now, the Chazal don't use those words, but I—because it's very much the same thing like the first Mishnah. Chazal use that idea, and that is: two tefachim were by the Eibishter, two were by Moshe, and two in the middle were left un— Like a talis, right? Metziah, like in the middle, right? Two and two, and each one was pulling. After the egel, each one was pulling. Says Chazal that Moshe overpowered the Eibishter and grabbed the luchos. And that's what it means at the end of the Torah, Luchos haYad hachazakah. Moshe was strong, yeah? He overpowered, and that's why we have a Torah. Pli ployim. First, I don't understand something. You think that the Eibishter's not stronger than Moshe Rabbeinu? Are you talking davar כזה? What are you saying? What does it mean? Here Chazal, Moshe won. You know, it says in the pasuk, V'etposes haluchos v'ashalchem mi'neichem. What is v'etposes? I grabbed it. So pashut pshat is because they got very heavy, the luchos. Chazal say that the luchos, the parches va'aver, the osiyos, it became heavy, so Moshe had to grab it. He had to hold on to it. It was— and then it fell. But according to this Yerushalmi, we have a new pshat. V'etposes haluchos, literally, like tefisa, like kol d'alim gavar, b'metzius. V'etposes. You hear? Toifes. I was toifes the luchos. Shnayim ochzin, they're fighting over the luchos. V'etposes, I was toifes. What's the pshat? Teirech pshat, please. Naaseh v'nishma. I want only what you want. Ritzoni is only what you want. What happened? They showed that that's not true. They showed that they said it, but they didn't mean it. Because they made the eigel, and while they were saying it, the pesuk says, while they were saying it, they were already thinking to make the eigel, which means they didn't really mean it. So Hashem says, now when you want to get Torah, you'll have to show Me that you mean it. So I make it difficult. I make it that it should be very, very not enjoyable. And af al pi kein, if you go take it, that means you really want it. That means you're mekayem the naaseh v'nishma. I do it. Naaseh v'nishma, you hear? What is naaseh v'nishma? No matter what I want. Yeah, but you showed that it's not true. Now from the learning itself, we're going to prove how much do you want it. And that's pshat in the Yerushalmi, that Moshe had to grab it. The Ribono Shel Olam is pulling it one way, like the nisyonos hachayim, nisyonos hachayim. The Ribono Shel Olam pulls one way. Difficult to learn. How could you learn? You had a chazakah. Strengthen yourself and grab it and take it, to show that you really want it. It was this chiddush. Of course the Eibishter could overpower.

Moshe Rabbeinu, he wasn't looking to do that. He wanted Moshe to fight for the Torah, because Torah has to be learned, naaseh v'nishma. I want it. I gave it to you, and what happened? You made an eigel. Obviously, it wasn't enough to just give you the Torah. Now you're going to have to what? Fight to get the Torah. You have to be toifes. You have to grab the Torah. This, rabosai, is the taich. You know, it's an interesting thing. What did they take off to make the eigel? You know what they took off? The nezamim. You know, there's many different types of jewelry. There's nose rings and earrings, and I don't have time to go into it, but many Rishonim say it wasn't earrings. Some Rishonim want to say it was the nose. Nezamim was the nose rings. It's a big shaila in the Rishonim. It's not for right now, this time, but you'll know that there's a big talk. Most Rishonim learn there was the earrings. There's a Zohar that explains why the earring, because an earring— Huh? Yeah, but what did they take? Vayisparku. Vayisparku, what does it say? Beozneihem. Beozneihem, okay. Okay. And when Aharon asks, only again beozneihem, only the ears? Read me again, read me again. Parku nizmei hazahav asher b'oznei nesheichem. Ah, because that's parku nizmei hazahav asher b'oznei. But what about yours? What gold did he ask from them? It's a shaila in the Rishonim. You'll look through the Rishonim. Okay, the point being, why dafka those nayim? Many other— So the Zohar writes, because when you had an eved, an eved, they used to put it in the ear. And what was the reason for that? In the ear was a siman of shibud; he's meshubad. You know, today they have earrings. You know, men, they wear earrings. So when you're on the right side, which means you're meshubad to a certain taiva. And if it's on the other side, it's meshubad to crazy people. And if you have two of them, so you're ... meshubad to all your craziness. But the point is that ear is a siman, ozen shoma. Okay. What did they want to do? To take off the nezamim that were in the ears, because they didn't want to be meshubad. Ki li Bnei Yisrael avadai. They try to be misparik. They want to undo the shibud. This the Tiferes Yonason, Rabbi Yonason Eibshitz, brings in the sefer. The idea of taking the earring is hefker from the shibud to the Eibishter, and that, free. And that is how you make an eved free. So, you know, it's very interesting: Eila Elohecha Yisrael. Tell me, when you want to talk about us, what do you say? Eila Eloheinu. Why Elohecha? You, not me. Yeah, you, not me. That's pashut. That's what I always learned the pshat. You talk about God for the other guy, because you don't want to be meshubad. Eila Elohecha Yisrael. It's for you. For me, I'm free. You hear? You hear the what? Eila Elohecha Yisrael. Free! Yeah, God, for the other guy. I'll tell you even more. Asher halucha me'eretz Mitzrayim. They thought this egel took them out of Mitzrayim. What are you talking about? I mean, you want to say it's an avodah zarah, fine. You want that good, merkavah, good, but don't say asher halucha, this thing didn't take you out of Mitzrayim. And the Torah says, what did Hashem say? Anochi Hashem Elokecha asher hotzeisicha me'eretz Mitzrayim. So you're meshubad. Rishonim say, you're meshubad to me because I took you out of Mitzrayim, yeah? Hei lo yehyeh lecha. So you're not meshubad. They try to undo shibud. Not literally this took you out of Mitzrayim. What's the difference who took you? Maybe he took you. It's like in English you say, you want the chair took you out of Mitzrayim. You think the chair took you out of Mitzrayim? You know what they're saying? Not the Eibishter. That's what he's saying. He doesn't mean literally, Hei lo yehyeh lecha... asher hotzeisicha me'eretz Mitzrayim. What he's trying to say is, you know what, the lamp post took you out of Mitzrayim. You think the lamp? Of course it didn't. But he's trying to say—

The language of the eigel and the ideas behind the eigel was all about lack of shem. I want to say over a vort from Reb Shaul Kagan, zichrono livrachah. He was the Rosh Kollel in Pittsburgh. I try to say over from him. He was a talmid chacham. He passed away. He was a little bit young, and I'm friends with his children, so I try to say over a vort from him. See, I see in his notes on his Chumash, he asks a question: here we see that the luchos broke because of the eigel. L'maaseh, the Gemara tells us the luchos rishonos were given b'kolos, was given with a lot of noise. Mimeila, it broke. He says, I don't understand. Did it break because of the noise, or did it break because of the luchos? A gute kasha. Very nice. It's a wonderful question. You know what I would say the pshat, rabosai, is like this. There was a lot of noise. Even the naaseh v'nishma wasn't real. You know what you ever see by a dinner? It's a lot—it's very noisy, and everybody, yeah, they're going to promise and they're going to do, and everybody gets up and claps. And who says one thing of there is real? Not one thing is real. When something is given b'kolos, it inspires people at the moment, yeah, but who says it was something which is given when nobody sees and nobody knows, and you say naaseh v'nishma, that's real. That's what Chazal mean. The first luchos, everything was a good show, so to speak, rashkes, chitzoniyus. So even the naaseh v'nishma was chitzoniyus. The Kabbalah was chitzon. You ever see sometimes you have a big wedding. Usually those big fancy weddings is because the chosson and kallah are not very happy. When the chosson and kallah are happy, you can make a small little tiny wedding with ten people, and each one is mekabel on themselves to have ahavah v'shalom, u'achvah v'reius. Let's talk a little, rabboisai. Pnimi. Kabbalas haTorah pnimi, to one Torah, to one mitzvahs. To externally talk about how we want, and internally want other things, that's ego. So the ego is shayach b'zman hazeh. I asked, is ego—we don't have avodah zarah. Avodah zarah doesn't have to mean literally that you go to the backyard and you do avodah zarah. Avodah zarah could mean ivu, lahem, for yourself. Lo hitir, like Chazal say, they did the avodah zarah to be matir for them the gilui arayos, because sometimes it's a facade for ratzon, taivah, pnimi that the person wants because he can't be mevatel himself to the ratzon Hashem. You've just experienced another Torah class brought to you by TorahAnytime.com.