Iggeres HaRamban: Speaking Gently as the Foundation of Yiras Shamayim

Transcript

This Torah class is brought to you by TorahAnytime.com. I would like to draw your attention to the Hageres Ramban, famous Iggeres Ramban. Tizaher ledaber kol devarecha, lechol adam, uvechol eis, b'nachas. Be careful to speak all your words, not sometimes nice and sometimes angry. No, all your words to all people, everyone, not only to big people, even to simple people. Uvechol eis, all times, even when they get you angry, even when they get under your skin. Tizaher ledaber kol devarecha lechol adam, uvechol eis, nachas, adinus. The opening statement of the Iggeres Ramban, his advice is language, how you speak, adinus, nachas, lechol adam, all your words, bechol eis. Mashgiach, the mashgiach Reb Nosson Zechutzadik livracha, Reb Nosson Wachtfogel, he was attached to these words of the Ramban. This was very common on his tongue, to always speak about this Ramban. The sefarim of the mashgiach write, Leket Rishimos Elul, Yom Noraim, page kuf chaf, how the mashgiach was very... Attached to these words. This was to him one of the loftiest of goals that he kept on being doresh. He was moneying it from people. It says over there that they once asked the Mashgiach, French jury, a lot of it is far from Torah, a lot of Yidden in France, and they have an opportunity to write in the French newspapers something about Yiddishkeit. It's Shabbos teshuva. Like this, this could be a word of chizuk, of aseres yemei teshuva. We have the opportunity that thousands are going to read it because they read these secular French newspapers. What should they write? It has to be short and to the point, something that could be a Shabbos teshuva drasha to the French secular Yidden. What should we write? Why do you think he told them to write? Tizaher ledaber kol verech, the words of the Ramban. Shabbos teshuva. You see, this to the Mashgiach was Shabbos teshuva. Did he write about doing teshuva? No, he wrote to them about—he wanted the message to get out to them. A Yid talks like this, and this is, to him, as the Ramban actually continues, is the yesod of everything, because through that you won't get angry, through that you'll have anavah, and through that you'll have yiras Shamayim. It all leads to yiras Shamayim if you talk the way you speak. If you're soft in your speech, you will have yiras Shamayim. And to the mashgiach, this was a miut hamachzik es hamerubah, so much contained in this sentence that this should have been the Shabbos teshuvah drasha. Well, they told him that it's a very tall order. You can ask for everyone to speak all the time, everything that they say to everyone. Who could do that? You're asking too much. We got to tone it down. So he tells, you know what, then that if the way you're saying it, and you need something more applicable, then I guess let's go to Plan B. What you should write is what the Gra says, what the Heilige Gaon writes: Shekol yamav tzarich adam lisyaser. A person has to work on himself, but not with taaniyos, not with fasting, and not with sigufim, but rather esem piv v'ta'avosav. Control your mouth and control your desires. And that was the Shabbos teshuvah drasha for the French people in the newspaper. Interesting, there is some mekor for this in the words of Rabbi Yisrael Salanter in Ohr Yisrael. Rabbi Yisrael Salanter writes that one of the avodos that are important, that Aseres Yemei Teshuvah—we think Aseres Yemei Teshuvah is to do big teshuvah and kaporos and chveis and groise...

Rabbi Yisrael Salanter says, Please work on something, and that is, when you see people, your friends, the people around you, on Aseres Yemei Teshuva, you need to speak softly and kindly and warmly, b'nachas, b'sever panim yafos, because a person during the Aseres Yemei Teshuva might be, as they say, he's angishtrengt, which means he's extremely stressed out because of the fear and the pachad, and you might come to speak in a somewhat on-edge tone to your friend, and you got to work on that to make sure in Aseres Yemei Teshuva you don't have it. So you start to see that l'daber b'nachas, as an avodah in Aseres Yemei Teshuva, is already rooted. It's already merumaz. It's already a mekor, in the words of Rabbi Yisrael Salanter himself, in our Yisrael. Aseres Yemei Teshuva, people are on edge. That's for you. That's the way you should feel inside between you and the Ribono Shel Olam. But the people around you don't have to feel that. You need to speak to them b'nachas uv'sever panim yafos. In Leket Rishimos, Limud HaMussar Avodas Hashem, it's another chelek, a volume of the mashgiach's sefarim that they put out from the mashgiach after he passed away. Page 45, they bring over there something interesting, that, like we said, this was on the tongue of the mashgiach always, this, l'zaer l'daber kol varecha. He said even the children in the house, not only the grown-ups around him who wanted to learn from him mussar and hashkafah, even the little kids knew that this is what the mashgiach was always telling them to repeat and to learn and to strive for, these words of the Igeres Rabbanan. And it says over there that when a kid would even raise his voice in the house, the mashgiach would right away begin with the old famous niggun of mussar from Rabbi Yisrael Salanter, the famous accepted niggun that they would sing in the yeshivas. Tizaher ledaber kol vorecha b'nachas l'chol adam. This was a common song on the lips of the Mashgiach, especially in his home. Now, what's so important of speaking softly, speaking humbly, speaking b'nachas? Why is that so important? What is the reason for this hanhaga? So the truth is, from the Ramban's mashma, as he says, it's m'midos ha'tovos. These are from the best attributes possible. Yet I want to quote a Chareidim. In Chareidim, perek lamed ches and lamed hei, Chareidim is a rishon, he says that it's actually mitzvas aseh, mi'divrei Kabbalah u'mi'divrei sofrim. It's almost like it's a mitzvah d'Rabbanan, hatluy b'peh u'v'kol, which means the windpipe, which means speech, the mouth and speech, v'efshar l'kayem b'chol yom, and that is, yisnaheg adam ledaber b'nachas, v'yishav k'medaber lifnei haMelech, sheyarei lharim kol lefanav, v'lo yakol eretz k'vodei. So we have an interesting Chareidim, and that is that it's almost like a mitzvah, mitzvah d'Rabbanan. It's not just the hu midah tovah, as the wording of the Ramban seems to imply. Now what is the reason of this midah of ledaber b'nachas according to the Chareidim? And the answer is, as he says, it's tznius Hashem. M'lo chol ha'aretz k'vodo, since the Ribono Shel Olam is everywhere, imagine the king is here, would you yell in front of a king? So this is a humility in front of Hashem. The Ramban seems to learn it's humility. The person is humble; he doesn't yell. The Chareidim seem to say that the pshat is the melech is here. Don't scream. You act polite in front of the king, and that's the reason to ledaber b'nachas. The Ramban wants that it should be nachas, so you'll come not to have kaas, and you'll have yiras Shamayim. You've just experienced another Torah class, brought to you by TorahAnytime.com.