Shiras Devorah: Reuven’s Inaction and the Responsibility to Feel Another’s Pain

Transcript

This Torah class is brought to you by TorahAnytime.com. Heyrikei, yafshiras d'vaira. It's interesting, besides for the shira on the nes that we have in Shiras Devorah, there's a lot of mussar, a lot of tochachah. Devorah gives different shevatim mussar for not joining in in the milchamah. Reuven is pointed out as the one that the taanah on him is, Ay tefach. Klal Yisroel goes to a milchamah. Lamah yashavta bein hamishpatayim, lishmoa shrikas haadarim, vazitzin shtud. What are you sitting at home for? Klal Yisroel goes to war. Gedolim chikrei lev. Wondrous, a peleh. It's what the question says, d'vaira. L'choirah, if it's a shirah, hallel to the Eibishter, how did the tochachah to Reuven come in the middle of the shirah? It's a stirah. Yeah, she gives credit to those that did go: Yissachar, Dan, Naftali, the shevatim were some. Yeah, that did go. Yoge-gangin, they got a special Yashar koach in the shirah. And therefore right away she goes to tochachah to those that didn't go. It's a chashdikelah peleh. We're in the shiur; it's place to talk about tochachah. It's not shirah. Brachah is one thing, and baalei mussar already speak that das hamoles degress the brachah, to tell a person tochachah and guide him for life. We think that we're doing ourselves big favors by giving a sweet, sweet talk and candy and telling our kids everything is great and you're wonderful. Chazal tell us, A bisel fun tochachah darf men doch hoben, and I say a bisel because I don't want to be sued for clergy malpractice. A bisel tochachah muz doch yeh zayn, yeah? A vi kumt es? Dos is brachah, for a tatte to a kind, soif yomo before he dies. A shirah is d'vera. You want to give a shmuyes to Reuven, call him into the beis medrash and זאג, tells him, Tzurah Rabbeinu Reuven, the yoshev for Reuven and the alech shuv for Reuven, lamah yashavta bein hamishpatay. But I have a bigger question. Few came. It's mashma that there are few. Yissachar, for example, joined in. Why? So let's discuss that. That's the dachtach shaylah. That's the question. What is the taina? Let's first get down to the understanding: what is the taina against Reuven for not going lamilchamah? He wasn't asked. We know clearly that it was only asked ten thousand people from Dan and Naftali, and we spoke that it had to be bedavka ten thousand people. No more that the nes should be, amededik nes, a yeshuah for Klal Yisrael. Good? So you weren't asked to come, so vos doch taina? How could you have tainas on someone who wasn't asked to come? So the emes is, we'll speak a little bit later from the Brisker Rav, if there was a chiyuv hachrimem in this particular milchamah. Halachically, you have to annihilate the seven nations that are in Canaan. Was this a chiyuv or a kiyum? I say it carefully because we'll discuss it in great length, a chiyuv or a kiyum of destroying, hachrim tachrimem, the shivah amim. But before we go there, I'd like to point out Rashi's pshat in the taina, the Metzudas's pshat in the taina, and then to read for you the Albag's pshat in the taina. Rashi zok: vos is di taina, lomo yoshavta, avososu gezesed bein hamishpatayim? So Rashi, he stood on the fence. Reuven stood on the fence. What was he standing on the fence? He wanted to see who's going to win.

Klal Yisroel wins, he follows Klal Yisroel. If Sisra wins, see lashon Rashi is, u'mah hi ha'mimusei? It was a sneaky move, so to speak, on the Ruvein's part. What was it? Yoshav lo bein mishpetei ha'milchamah, he stood on the fence, so to speak, lishmoa mi ynatzeach. Yeah, the machshavah doygin, ich voych azoy gemacht, doygin, and I read this. What, he wanted to see if Klal Yisroel wins, he'll follow Klal Yisroel; if not, he goes with Sisra. You know, I know politicians, that's how they, you know, they see who's winning, and then they become your ally. Ruvein, mit Sisra gam. He would join Sisra's ranks if Sisra wins. We'll get back to this a little bit later, maybe, maybe. Efsher mitnahaven a pshat, the kasha is a lot better than the teretz. The Metzudas learns that the ta'ina on Reuven is, yoshavta bein ha'mishpatayim, in no man's land. Lishmoa srikas ha'dorim has to do with the cattle and the sheep. Don't forget, where is Reuven large? Where is Reuven's part of Eretz Yisrael? He wanted Eiver HaYarden. And what was the reason for wanting Eiver HaYarden? The dorim, they had cattle there, they had sheep, they had mikneh, which means you have no fear to be on the boundary. Hast du tachnish k'moira, az eilah the Metzudas, if you chose to live in Gaza. If you live on the grenitz, so you must be a mensch, must be bitachon, and you're not afraid of nothing. You're fearless. No. So why did you show such fear? Why did you show such weakness here by not joining in the war? ... a scaredy-cat, so to speak. Look where you live. That you're not afraid. A sheiner shtub in a bad neighborhood, that doesn't frighten you. A gevaldige chacham, that frightens you. ... The Ralbag learns that the ta'ina is, and I quote you the loshon, zogt der Ralbag, the ta'ina is, ... V'hinei toma olov, lomah yoshavta bein ha-mishpatayim bimkomcha. What are you sitting at home? Bein ha-mishpatayim means it's in shtub. You're sitting. You do—it's not the get, ... and you're sitting home. V'lo his'orerta. Pay attention to the word of the Ralbag, lo his'orerta. You weren't moved. Bizos ha-milchamah, aval lo yisa yoshev bitecha v'yishamea, because the Yisroel, the oyvim, and you heard the cannons and the fighting and the explosions, yeah. V'yishachim bimkomcha, v'lo chashash la-zeh. It didn't affect you whatsoever. It's wondrous. The chikrei, it's tut zach badir in hearts. Al sheshoktu aleihem v'lo nasnu lev latzeis misham. Vi zitzt Ruach vin Klal Yisrael is a matzav fun milchamah un tzarah. Haboisai, I want to discuss Yisrael Bag in great length. Yisrael Bag talks to me a lot. Says a lot to me, and it should say a lot to all of us. I can't hear, what? It seems like the tainus more on Ruvin than anybody more else than... Those that didn't go, but I guess Reuven got the message. The message was sent to Reuven. It's a good haarah, why דווקא Reuven? Okay, al kol panim. You know, this week's parsha that we just leined in Shemos, we find Moshe Rabbeinu's haschalah, the beginning of who and what a Moshe Rabbeinu is. Shteit pasuk: Vayeitzei el echav, vayar b'sivlosam, vayar ish Mitzri makish Ivri me'echav, u'ner gitah shmais dem Ivri.

The mitzri, when .... There's a Rambam in Moreh Nevuchim that says it's a must. For a manhig b'Yisrael, this was a must-be, that he had to have done an act like this. A person cannot grow to godliness of nevuah and manhigus in Klal Yisrael unless he did an act showing courage to stand up to protect the chayid, harabim, and eitzarah. U'meileh the Torah is telling us that Moshe Rabbeinu begins this way, that he stands up to protect the ... How old is Moshe Rabbeinu at this point? It's machlokes in the Midrash. Ein Tanan Medrash says he was twelve years old. He was twelve years old. Ein Tanna learned ... oh, I'm sorry, the Yiddish, forgive me. Twenty. Tzvanzig is twenty. Okay. One Tanna says he was forty. The other Tanna says he was sixty. And they all darshen around the pesukim, sar shofet mi'somchu l'sar shofet. How old do you have to be a sar? You have to be a shofet. The Ramban takes on that he was twelve years old, and the pasuk says clearly, Mi'samcha l'ish. ... Dasan v'Aviram shouted to him. You ever see a person in shul screams at a little kid, ... That's what Dasan v'Aviram screams at Moshe Rabbeinu: Mi, samcha l'ish? ... Bar out. Not your business. Let me ask you a shaila, rabosai. Van it kumt a ingel azar, pshah, maybe they can't believe him, huh? First of all, Azav is Yisroel. Az a gvurah, he's 12 years old. He's 12 years old. No good, I'm not gonna tell you, I understand. Moshe Rabbeinu's 12 is our chaver's 30. Okay, I got you, shey. He's saying Moshe's 12 is our 12. He wasn't playing Game Boy like the 12-year-old do today. Good, good. Huh? He was a shame. He was a shame. That's a kasha. Okay, so let me ask you like this. First of all, how does he bichlal know he's a Yid? How does Moshe Rabbeinu state, Vayeitzei el echav, vayar b'sivlosam? Ivri makish, Ivri me'echav. How does he know bichlal he's a Yid? So there's one rishon that addresses this shaila, Kelacha Yadik, he just points out, ki higidu lo shehu Yehudi d'Ramban. The Ramban says, Min, minhem otam gezak. They, they told him. How does Moshe Rabbeinu, sitting in a castle as the son of Paro, know that he's a Yid? Vos, vos? Zogt der Ramban, ki higidu lo shehu Yehudi. Mit em gezogt. Vilst mir zogn, ver hot em gezogt? Okay, the mefarshim, today's heintige mefarshim, they deal with it. Who is the one that told it to him? So the emes is, you could come and say maybe there was a ... that had a conscience. One of the servants of Paro had a conscience a little bit. And he pulls over, Moshe says, Maybe, you know, maybe you don't know, you're adopted. Or maybe the medium in Mitzrayim didn't let him swallow it. Maybe every day mitgahakt in the gasen, but you know, Pari's illegitimate, a Yid. Huh? Wait a minute, let's see, let's discuss it. So the emes is, meken zogn, kipshutoi, bas Yocheved gezogt. Efsher bas Yocheved gezogt. How about Yocheved? Efsher Yocheved. Yocheved had him for two years. Efsher she sang him lullabies in lita, and flegt men di mames fleg zingen tsu di kinderlach bist a Yid. Teire, ulei seirasosa shashuai. Efsher Yocheved the mother. Yocheved the mother, for the first two years of his life she was by Yocheved, yeah? Rav Shteinman learns that it was Yocheved in his sefer. You see, he wants to say it was Yocheved. Ah, only two years? It was under two. So he says there are other people who remember under two. Must be talking about himself, I don't know. There are talmidei chachamim like these, they remember. They have, you know, they have memories because their brain is...

He says, Yesh anoshim that remember what happened to them before they were two years old. All right. And then he brings it into the Santa Medrash in Parshas Vezos Habrachah, that Moshe Rabbeinu on the day that he was born had a big conversation with his mother and his father about the geulah and the galus. He brings a Medrash, shein. So from day one, Moshe Rabbeinu on the day that he was born... ...gishprech mit zei tatn, zei mameh... ...when er redt vegn galus un di eibershten geulah... You knew this? ...He's one years old, yeah? What? The pasuk said that he was one years old. It's based on... Yeah. Ah, you want to see, that's what it means: kol ha... Not pshat, not pshat, not pshat. They say that the voice that he cried like a naar. How did she know as a Yehudi? No. ...veha'alta... ...v'haalta tzaddik... Some say. ...that from the voice, from the crying, hot men shoin gezen az er iz shoin a Yid. Good. Very nice. Good. Maskim? Okay. Let's say that this is taka all true. But who ingrained in him az a zal hobn azal libe far Klal Yisroel? What? Something is missing, and a better question: if this is all emes, why is it not in the Torah? That's a kasha. Why do we find... And the baal says, ...all my life. Why does it start, he went out and he saw and he was meitzar? How does it start? You see, me and you, we sit there, we have Musar shmuzen, tag and nacht, like in Eretz Yisrael, mipabin Yidden un Klal Yisrael. Who gave them all these shmues? Where did it come from? And if it's true, why do we have to read it as it happened, as our ... he has this, this noisei b'ol im chaveiro, un hevil harging the Mitzri. I have a different question about ... which is maybe even stronger. This is more of a question. This is a kasha. Did he put himself in sakana, Moshe Rabbeinu? Oh, he sure did. You see clearly. Vayifen ko vako, vayar ki ein ish, vayach es haMitzri. The next day they found, achi noda hadavar, and he fled. He's running away. He's in danger. Is the halacha that one should put himself in danger to save another person? Is that halacha? I see you're making ... You don't even know how deep the shaila is. ... That's what I'm telling you. How did he realize he wouldn't ...? That's right. Oh, you mean he made a mistake? He made a mistake. He thought nobody was looking. Ah, you're saying that he was, he calculated ... Had there been somebody, he wouldn't have done it, because he thought he'd get away with it, but he never got away with it. No. I'll let it pass, even though I don't feel that's the real pshat, but let me just get to the heart of the shaila. Habeisai, there's a mekor to the Meshech Chochmah in the parsha. The Meshech Chochmah writes that a person is not mechuyav to put himself in danger to save ... Not in other Yid, and not even Gans Klal Yisroel. And the raya is because when Moshe Rabbeinu was sent on the shlichus to save Klal Yisroel, the Ribono Shel Olam prefaces it with, Ki meisu kol ha'anashim hamevakshim es nafshecha. Says the Meshech Chochma, if lulei yetzuyer, they were not passed away, they did not die away, Moshe Rabbeinu would not have to put himself even in a safek sakoneh to save Klal Yisroel, even if it means Gans Klal Yisroel. ... When I bring ... a gadol hador is not taken out of ... if he's a shogeg and he goes to ... even if rabim tzrichim lo, he's in danger. His life comes first. Tell me, throughout Klal Yisroel, we don't have people endangering themselves for Klal Yisroel? What's that, the Meshech Chochma? Tell me, we're going to read about Esther a few months, a month or two away. What was Esther? Esther didn't put herself in sakoneh. ...

You should be a Rosh Yeshiva, tell me a bracha. But let me speak out the mareh mekomos just to show you how it's right in front of your nose, and we don't even have to go to Esther. I'll show it to you in two seconds, okay? How about Miriam? What was Miriam doing at the nahar? Is anybody... lo daas, Miriam? She stood there to know. To know what? What was her point? What was she planning on standing there watching, huh? Why not? I can't hear. Whatever you want. This shiur is... So let me tell you like this. The Gemara says lo daas, she was wondering what's with her nevuah, because she gave a whole nevuah that there'll be a child and a geulah and everything will be fine. So she wanted to know, lo daas what? She was wondering, contemplating what's the end. There's a... they said, ... Hey, Miriam, she stood there. She didn't have much reason to stand there, but she also couldn't walk away from there. Hagar, when the child was sick and she couldn't do anything, she didn't want to see, she threw him away. That's because when you're selfish, you don't want to see and it hurts too much. ... v'af davek del kind. The Yiddishe shvester, you hear? Doesn't turn the back. As painful as it is, the Torah is trying to contrast ... Hagar. She couldn't do anything. What could Miriam have? Nothing, right? But you don't turn the back. Hashvest. I want to tell you more about this. I don't think the Eibishter knows. V'hinei nar boicha. She says it's meyaldei ha'Ivrim. How did she know that it's meyaldei ha'Ivrim? How did she know? And the oilam asks this for a kasha. Nar boicha, the Baal HaTurim brings in, it's a medrash, rabboisai, it's actually Aharon HaKohen. Nar is Aharon, who's standing by the... Nar is Aharon HaKohen. V'hinei nar boicha. That's what they say, the nar is referring to Aharon. So she says, if a brother could stand and watch, to cry is a baby. How old was Aharon already? He could stand there and shed tears for his brother, meyaldei ha'Ivrim. Bashi is starting to get a picture of what Yiddishkeit is, what Yiddishkeit is. I don't want to tell you more. The Rambam tells us a chiddush nifla. When Miriam got tzaraas, זכרה השם למרים. Miriam loved Moshe, גמולי כנאף על פיקי. That's his famous shmues, the Rambam's shmues about tzaraas. Look, even Miriam loved her brother so much that she got tzaraas, and he sticks in, her brother who she raised him. V'siknoh b'atzmo l'hatzilo min hayam. She put herself in danger to save him from the waters. The Rambam learns that she stood there, and she had a plan that she was going to take him. She threw him in, and she stood there waiting for the moment, even if it meant sakana. V'shachachna. I thought you told me someone is not supposed to put himself in sakana. There's no mitzvah to put yourself in sakana to save another person. And here we see clearly, siknoh b'atzmo. I have another question. Yeah? Tell me about Basya. Do you think Basya—yeah, my eye is on the clock, don't worry. Give me another minute, chavre, a minute or two. Tell me, do you think Basya was not in danger by coming home with this ingele? No one's thought about it. And the answer, I believe, is the pasuk teaches, Vatachmol. She had rachmanus on him, and I want to tell you more. David HaLevi Shlitus has a meiredike vort. Rashi says she went to the waters. Lirchotz mi'beis gilulei aviha. Most learn that she was a giyores. It's not clear if it meant—but let's say it means she became a giyores. Zachah David, from vatachmol, chazal, because of a tachmol. Nar a Yid, chazal... she puts...

She comes home, she's a meshugeneh husband, ... You don't understand. They're looking to get rid of, they're looking to get rid of the Yeshiva shel Yisroel. Pari is a phobia, shlachtach nisht ... And she comes home, I guess what I found? We're in the water. A Yiddishe baby! Why did he let it? I don't know the history. You have to look, you have to find the ... I don't know. But eizach push it is a nisht geven. It's not like, you know, it's like a Chanukah gift. You come home to your husband with a beautiful gold watch and he's thrilled with it. I'm sure Pari wasn't thrilled. Yeah? Wants to ... Yidden, Yidden, Yidden. A Yid leigt zich ahin in sakana, vatachemelchem lo. That's what our middah is. So then, vos is der taich? I think Chazal want us to learn in Meish Rabbeinu, a Yid does not have to be taught this rachmanus. It is. Vayeitzei elechav, he's drawn to it. Vayar b'sivlosam. It's a natural reaction from one Yid to another. You know what a Siamese twin is? They say when one is in pain, the other is in pain. Sure. Could you imagine a Siamese twin with one heart? Shavad, yeah? Hadei sai, the Torah wants us to believe that we are that. Ish echad? No, isn't that what we're taught? Ish echad b'lev echad. If you look at the lashon, the sipur, the his'orer, the sipurna stresses that Moshe Rabbeinu was his'orer, and the Ramban and Vuchim use the same lashon. It was a natural reaction. Possibly, how does Moshe know that he's a Yid? Because vayar, vayesivloisam. Something is hurting him. Something is drawing him. Something is awakening him to take nekamah. I see everybody's putting on their hats and jackets, and now is the right time to tell you, I'm meiredike maaseh. I'm sorry. I know it's the rush hour. It's rush hour, but you're getting a maaseh. Hear a maaseh. When I was having my second son, NYU, it was an all-nighter right before Rosh Hashanah. I always kibitz with my son. You already kept me up all night then. It was a siman tov for what's going to come in the future. Long, sleepless nights. On top of everything, my taanis shviger was there as well. You're putting all the jokes you want on your own, okay? So what did I do? At the morning after the baby is born, it was six in the morning, the shviger was already very cranky. From my sake, I said, Hi, shviger, can I get you a coffee? I know she likes coffee. She needs coffee. We won't get into needing or wanting the coffee. Al kol panim, yeah, she wants a coffee. I went downstairs. There's a kosher bakery right on First Avenue, as soon as you come down there, and I tell the— I need a coffee, but make it... Make it an espresso double. I think we're gonna need two shots of whatever you got in there, okay. A lady comes over to me, You heard what happened in the Baltimore community. You heard what happened in the community. I only heard screaming the night before. I said, No, I had a baby. I don't know. Criminal activity. I don't know. They caught upset. Ten years ago, the oil knows what happened. Ten years ago, it was a criminal issue. I mean, she is so happy, gleaming, anti-Chassidim, anti-Dati, you know. I can't tell you the amount of pain that I felt at that moment. I felt like someone took a knife and stabbed me. I couldn't be sovel. I couldn't swallow it. Couldn't swallow it. I'm glad ... I have no connection, and yet it pained me to no end. And I said to the Ribono Shel Olam, my nature is to be quiet. I don't, you know, you hear me there in the shiur, you think I'm a loud guy. I'm rather not. Don't get it. I have to not be that loud. And I say to myself, I'm not gonna let it go. I can't help me. Put the right words in my mouth. This is what came out, be'ezras Hashem, because I don't know where it came from.

Afterwards walked away, said, Wow. He pressed on my side. He didn't know where I even had it in me. I said, Let me tell you, if you ever fell in the street and you needed any help because of a heart attack or whatever whatnot, the first to respond in seconds would be the Hatzalah. It's these bubbe v'chassidim. Don't talk about them; you might need them one day. She was taken back. Fast forward ten years. Bein hazmanim, my boys, the early minyan to them is about 11, 11:30 on a bein hazmanim Sukkos. I daven at 6:30, but to them, the first minyan begins at 11:30. Where are you gonna find the minyan at 11:30 with a little bit of ...? Boro Park. I used to live in Brooklyn, Boro Park. Take you to Boro. Avada, I'll take you to Boro. We come to the Boro Bais Medrash. There's Talmuds, Boro, you know, Boro on a Yom Tov, 11:30, it's still early over there. Al kol panim, I say, No, puns intended. Okay, yeah? I tell my children, Listen to me, Pinchas and Yitzchok, you got 45 minutes, and it's enough for you. Trust me, if you could daven at 11:30, 45 minutes is more than enough. I'll pick you up in 45 minutes. I'm good, all right? Trust me, they were out by 42 minutes. They were already out. They're standing there, I picked them up, they get into the car. My oldest son tells me, Tai left my ... my lulav in shul. I forgot I left my lulav in ... Imagine already the davening that went on. Oh yeah, he left his lulav. Tom, go get it. He goes, in the middle, heard min geshrei, and he hears screaming. I look, it was right by my car. What was it? It was a goyish, a Spanish, who was trying to abduct the Yiddishe kind. Chassidim walking out of shul with the lulav and the esrog, they see this, and they scream one to the other, Be careful, a tapik, there's a gun. I'm listening to all this, and my first reaction is, Get out of there. But I had my son, I couldn't. What was their reaction? They're running to save the child on first impulse with the lulav and the esrog. Be careful, he has a gun. They're screaming to each other. I said, Why was I zoche to see this? It was ten years earlier. I was b'lamed zechus, and I saw the shemkeit for a Yid. The Ribono Shel Olam showed me what the impulse a Yid has, his soyres, to help for notsaychen without even thinking. And I would like to tell you, my rebbe, this will end. The ma'areh, thiskin says a ma'aseh dike vort. The next day they go out and they're fighting. Vayomer ochein, noida hadavar. What is noida hadavar? They found out that I beat the Mitzri. That's not how the ma'areh diskin learns the pshat. He was wondering, how could it be, asvei Yidden shlogen zach, un kein a helf nisht? How could it be that you see two Yidden fighting, says the ma'areh diskin, and nobody stood up? It didn't move anybody to get involved. Achei, noida hadavar. Now I know why they're in golus. I know why there's no geulah. My real discomfort, baisai. You hear a vort? Achei, noida hadavar. If there's nobody could react, a Yid has to be able to react, and this chabeis is the Ralbag, and I get back to the words of the Ralbag. What are you sitting bimkomcha? The lashon is, V'lo his'orerta b'zois. It didn't move you. Klal Yisroel is in a tzarah. Forget about the mitzvah. You're right, you were not commanded. You're right, you weren't asked to come. But why weren't you mis'orer on your own to come? Yedomim chikrei lev. Where is your lev? The kashya is, avu is der lev? Der Yid is nisht azoi, un dos is der ta'ina. Not chiyuv, you're not mechuyav. But how could it be that you weren't moved on your own to come help when you see a matziv that, chas v'shalom, dos lelt min der yesod. A Yiddishen dem hartz, der rachmanus, der baishanim, der goymlei chasadim means health and not tzveifel, till mesiras nefesh. Huh? That's because you didn't come.

You've just experienced another Torah class, brought to you by TorahAnytime.com.