The Three Loves of Every Jew: Ahavas Hashem

Topics

• The Three Loves
• The Human Need for Love
• Searching for the Love the Soul Seeks
• Love Is Not Self-Gratification
• How Can Love Be Commanded?
• The Love Already Planted Within the Neshamah
• The Greatest Reward Is the Relationship Itself
• Hashem’s Love Remains Even When It Is Hidden
• Hashem’s Messages Throughout the Day
• A Journey Outside Yerushalayim
• “You Called Me My Brother”
• The Unbreakable Loyalty of a Jewish Soul
• “I Am Sick with Love”
• A Letter from the Ruins of the Warsaw Ghetto
• “I Love You Anyway”
• “Cholas Ahavah” Is Not Merely a Condition
• Tapping into the Love Already Within Us

Transcript

## The Three Loves

Be’ezras Hashem, we hope to begin a series of shiurim entitled the **Gimel Ahavos**—the three loves. The Baal Shem Tov taught that part of his mission in this world was to bring awareness to the importance of developing these three loves: **Ahavas Hashem, Ahavas HaTorah, and Ahavas Yisrael**.

The Torah itself uses the language of *ahavah* regarding each of them. Regarding Hashem, the Torah commands, “Ve’ahavta es Hashem Elokecha”—“You shall love Hashem, your God” (Devarim 6:5). Regarding Torah, Dovid HaMelech declares, “Mah ahavti Sorasecha”—“How deeply I love Your Torah” (Tehillim 119:97). Regarding another Jew, the Torah commands, “Ve’ahavta l’rei’acha kamocha”—“You shall love your fellow as yourself” (Vayikra 19:18).

These are the **Gimel Ahavos**, the three fundamental loves that stand at the heart of Yiddishkeit. Be’ezras Hashem, we will discuss each one separately: what it is and how it may be attained.

The pasuk of “Ve’ahavta es Hashem Elokecha” itself emphasizes three dimensions: “b’chol levavcha, u’v’chol nafshecha, u’v’chol me’odecha”—with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your resources (Devarim 6:5). In later shiurim, we will show how the three loves are alluded to within these three expressions, and how Ahavas HaTorah and Ahavas Yisrael are themselves inseparably connected to Ahavas Hashem.

This is what the Torah seeks from a Jew: to love Hashem, to love His Torah, and to love Klal Yisrael.

## The Human Need for Love

We will begin with **Ahavas Hashem**.

Every human being needs love. A person longs both to love and to be loved. Much of the unhappiness in the world comes from the fact that love is misunderstood. An enormous amount has been written about *simchah* and happiness because people are searching; they feel an emptiness, but they do not clearly understand what love truly is or what kind of love their souls are seeking.

Shlomo HaMelech describes this search in Shir HaShirim:

> “On my bed at night, I sought the one whom my soul loves; I sought him, but I did not find him” (Shir HaShirim 3:1).

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## Searching for the Love the Soul Seeks

“As I lay upon my bed at night, I searched.” What was I searching for? I was searching for **“she’ahavah nafshi”**—the love that my soul desires. “Bikashtiv v’lo metzasiv”—I searched, but I did not find it (Shir HaShirim 3:1).

Why was it not found?

The next pasuk continues:

> “I will arise and circulate through the city, through the marketplaces and streets; I will seek the one whom my soul loves” (Shir HaShirim 3:2).

A person imagines: Perhaps if I go here, travel there, experience this, stand in that place, or join that scene, I will finally discover happiness and love. He searches through the marketplaces and streets—the public world of activity and enjoyment—but still declares, “I sought him, and I did not find him.”

He may find enjoyment, but he does not find the love for which his neshamah is searching. The reason is simple: he is searching for the wrong thing. He has not identified what **“she’ahavah nafshi”** truly means. Love has been misunderstood and misplaced.

## Love Is Not Self-Gratification

The baalei mussar explained that people regularly use the word *love* in the wrong context. Rav Eliyahu Lopian gives a familiar example. A person eats a piece of fish or a steak and says, “I love fish; I love steak.” But does he truly love the fish? If he loved it, he would not cut it apart and consume it. He loves himself, and he enjoys what the fish gives him.

We throw around the word “love,” and as a result we lose sight of its true meaning.

## How Can Love Be Commanded?

What, then, is genuine *ahavah*, and how does one attain it? This question becomes especially pressing regarding **Ahavas Hashem, Ahavas HaTorah, and Ahavas Yisrael**. Love appears to be an emotion: either one feels it or one does not. How can the Torah command a person to love?

The Rambam addresses this directly. He explains that when a person contemplates Hashem’s creations and recognizes their extraordinary wisdom and greatness, he is moved to love and praise their Creator (Hilchos Yesodei HaTorah 2:2).

Rav Elchonon Wasserman likewise discusses the difficulty of understanding how *emunah* can be obligatory. Great thinkers have struggled with questions of faith, yet the Torah obligates every Jew—including a young boy upon becoming bar mitzvah—to possess emunah and fulfill all the mitzvos. How can so young a person already be held responsible for something that has occupied the minds of philosophers?

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## The Love Already Planted Within the Neshamah

The simple answer is that, although *emunah* and *ahavah* certainly contain many levels, their basic roots are naturally implanted within every Jewish soul. Every Jew is born with a **Yiddishe neshamah**, and within that neshamah lies what we might call the spiritual DNA of **Ahavas Hashem, Ahavas HaTorah, and Ahavas Yisrael**. Emunah in Hashem—strong and unyielding—is likewise part of the inner constitution of a Jew.

This is among the unique qualities of Klal Yisrael. The Jew does not begin entirely outside of emunah and ahavah and then attempt to manufacture them. Their foundations already live within him. His avodah is to uncover them, strengthen them, and allow them to govern his life.

## The Greatest Reward Is the Relationship Itself

The Kedushas Levi, whose avodah was permeated by love of Hashem, love of Torah, and love of Klal Yisrael, offers a beautiful insight into the opening words of Shir HaShirim:

> “Yishakeini mineshikos pihu, ki tovim dodecha miyayin”—“Let Him kiss me with the kisses of His mouth, for Your love is better than wine” (Shir HaShirim 1:2).

Shir HaShirim describes the love between Hashem and Klal Yisrael. What is the greatest pleasure a Jew experiences in serving Hashem? It is not merely the reward he will receive for learning Torah, davening, or fulfilling mitzvos. Reward is certainly meaningful, but it is not the ultimate expression of love.

**“Yishakeini mineshikos pihu”**—the highest good is that Hashem loves me, that He draws me close, that there is a living connection between us. **“Ki tovim dodecha miyayin”**—that relationship is dearer than wine, dearer than any external pleasure or reward.

The awareness that Hashem loves the Jew awakens the Jew’s love for Hashem. We must therefore carry with us the knowledge that the Ribbono Shel Olam loves us. At times this is difficult. We encounter tremendous *nisyonos*, suffering, and tragedies that leave us confused. Yet one truth must remain clear and unyielding: **the Ribbono Shel Olam loves us**.

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## Hashem’s Love Remains Even When It Is Hidden

We witness terrible suffering and tragedies, and we are left confused. Nevertheless, one understanding must remain firm and unyielding: **the Ribbono Shel Olam loves us**. That love calls forth a response from us—the reciprocal love and connection that a Jew directs back toward Hashem.

The Zohar teaches that if people truly understood how deeply HaKadosh Baruch Hu loves Klal Yisrael, they would roar like lions as they ran after Him. A lion roars while pursuing its goal; so too, a Jew would pursue the Ribbono Shel Olam with overwhelming longing if he fully recognized the love Hashem bears toward him.

A person may not always feel that love openly. Yet deep within his heart remains the *emunah* and the *hergesh*: **Hashem loves me in every situation, and in return I love Hashem.** This is a *yerushah* received from our forebears and implanted within us from birth.

## Hashem’s Messages Throughout the Day

Even during the darkest periods, when a person feels lost, the Ribbono Shel Olam sends reminders of His love. To use a contemporary analogy, Hashem sends us small “messages” throughout the day: *I am thinking about you. I am here with you.*

The avodah is to notice and read those messages. We often fail to answer our calls and messages, but when Hashem sends a message of love, we must learn to recognize it.

Shlomo HaMelech says:

> “Ani yesheinah v’libi er; kol dodi dofeik”—“I am asleep, but my heart is awake; the voice of my beloved is knocking” (Shir HaShirim 5:2).

Even while the person appears spiritually asleep, his heart is awake. The Ribbono Shel Olam is knocking upon the doors of his neshamah: *Open the door. I am here. I am not distant, and I have not abandoned you.*

## A Journey Outside Yerushalayim

Years ago, while visiting Eretz Yisrael on behalf of the yeshivah, I was scheduled to deliver shiurim in various yeshivos and meet bachurim who might eventually join the yeshivah. One of those yeshivos was located in a remote area on the outskirts of Yerushalayim.

This was before the days of GPS. I entered a taxi in Bayit Vegan with only approximate directions written on a piece of paper. At that time, there had been many terrorist attacks, and during the journey I grew increasingly uncomfortable. I could not identify the driver or determine where we were going, and as we traveled farther into an unfamiliar area, the concern became stronger.

Eventually we became lost. The driver turned to me and asked whether I knew the way. He became increasingly nervous and frustrated, radioing for directions, while I sat in the back seat becoming more anxious myself.

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## “You Called Me My Brother”

Sitting in the back of the taxi, I began to say Tehillim. The driver remained nervous and frustrated, and I remembered the teaching of Chazal: “Whenever you turn, turn toward the right” (Yoma 15b). I said to him, **“Achi—my brother—turn right.”**

He immediately slammed on the brake. The taxi stopped short, and I thought to myself, *We are in trouble.*

He turned around and asked, “What did you say?”

I repeated, “Turn right.”

“No,” he said. “What did you say before that?”

“I said, ‘Achi—my brother.’”

He opened the glove compartment, removed a yarmulke, and placed it upon his head. Then he said:

> “You called me your brother. You struck me in the heart. The only place I hear someone call me that is when I go to the Kosel.”

That was the Ribbono Shel Olam knocking upon the door of a neshamah and sending a message: **You are my brother.**

We must learn how to speak to all our brothers. Sometimes it takes only one word—a kind word, a word of love, a word of acceptance—to reach the deepest part of a Jew’s neshamah and awaken it. “You called me my brother. You struck me in the heart. Only at the Kosel do I hear that.”

## The Unbreakable Loyalty of a Jewish Soul

A Jew, no matter what he endures, remains loyal to the deepest truths of his neshamah. Difficulties and *yissurim* cannot uproot the essential love of Hashem implanted within him.

Shlomo HaMelech describes Klal Yisrael’s suffering:

> “The watchmen found me; they struck me and wounded me” (Shir HaShirim 5:7).

A Jew may be attacked and wounded precisely because he is a Jew. Yet how does he respond in the moment of trial? He does not, chas v’shalom, abandon the essence of his neshamah or turn against his love for Hashem.

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## “I Am Sick with Love”

The next pasuk gives the response of Klal Yisrael:

> “Hishbati eschem, b’nos Yerushalayim: im timtze’u es dodi, mah tagidu lo? Shecholas ahavah ani”—“I adjure you, daughters of Yerushalayim: if you find my beloved, what shall you tell Him? That I am sick with love” (Shir HaShirim 5:8).

You may strike me and wound me, but it will not remove the love. I remain loyal. **“Shecholas ahavah ani”**—I am lovesick.

When a person is ill, his condition is not something he simply chooses at will. It has become part of his reality. So too, the love of Hashem within a Jew is not a superficial preference that can be discarded when circumstances become painful. It is inherent. It lives within the neshamah and cannot be taken away.

## A Letter from the Ruins of the Warsaw Ghetto

I would like to share a deeply moving letter. Years ago, I purchased a sefer in Eretz Yisrael whose introduction recounted that, among the ruins of the Warsaw Ghetto—between shattered stones and human remains—a small bottle was discovered containing a handwritten note. The note was said to have been written by a Jew who knew that his death was imminent and that he would soon join the thousands who had already been murdered.

It was a long letter, and every word expressed the inner essence of Yiddishkeit—the voice of a Jewish neshamah speaking to the Ribbono Shel Olam.

The writer said, in substance:

> “I know that death is approaching and that I must finish writing. I die with inner calm, but not with despair. I have followed You, Ribbono Shel Olam, even when it appeared that You were pushing me away. I fulfilled Your mitzvos even when I was tortured because of them. I loved You, and I remained—and will remain—among those who love You. Even when I was crushed to the dust and made an object of humiliation, I remained faithful.”

The introduction then related a story that the writer had heard from his rebbe. A Jewish family miraculously escaped the Spanish Inquisition and boarded a small vessel in the hope of reaching safety. During the voyage, a violent storm shattered the boat. The man’s wife and children drowned, while he alone survived and reached the shore.

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## “I Love You Anyway”

Broken and shattered, the survivor looked upward and said:

> “Ribbono Shel Olam, what irony! You saved me from the Spanish Inquisition only for my entire family to be lost at sea. How shall I respond? Ribbono Shel Olam, I want You to know that I love You anyway. There is nothing You can do that will push me away. My love remains strong. No matter what happens, I love You.”

The Jew in the Warsaw Ghetto concluded his own letter with the same declaration. After all the horrors he had experienced under the Nazis, he still turned to the Ribbono Shel Olam and proclaimed **“Shema Yisrael.”** Despite everything, he loved Hashem.

This is the miracle and wonder of Yiddishkeit: through torture, persecution, and unspeakable suffering, the Jew continues to love the Ribbono Shel Olam. That love is not erased.

## “Cholas Ahavah” Is Not Merely a Condition

Let us return to the wording of the pasuk: **“Shecholas ahavah ani”** (Shir HaShirim 5:8).

In ordinary Hebrew, one might have expected the words “ani cholas ahavah”—“I am sick with love.” Why does the pasuk reverse the order and say, “cholas ahavah ani”?

The answer is that the word **“ani”** is not functioning merely as part of a verb: *I am presently lovesick.* Rather, **“cholas ahavah”** describes the *ani* itself. Who am I? What defines me? I am a **cholas ahavah**—a Jew whose very identity is bound up with love of the Ribbono Shel Olam.

The pasuk is not merely reporting a temporary feeling. It is revealing the essence of the Jew. My defining quality is **“cholas ahavah ani.”** I love You, Ribbono Shel Olam. This is who I am.

## Tapping into the Love Already Within Us

This is what we are, and this is what we can uncover. When we understand what *ahavah* truly means, and when we recognize how deeply our neshamah already loves the Ribbono Shel Olam, we can tap into that inner love. Through it, a Jew can find happiness even in extremely difficult times and fulfill:

> “Ve’ahavta es Hashem Elokecha b’chol levavcha”—“You shall love Hashem, your God, with all your heart” (Devarim 6:5).

Be’ezras Hashem, the next discussion will address **Ahavas HaTorah**—what a Jew feels for Torah and how deeply one can discover love within Torah. Afterward, we will speak about **Ahavas Yisrael**: the love that exists within us for every Jew, and how all three loves are contained within “Ve’ahavta es Hashem Elokecha.”