Purim and Yom Kippur: Achdus, Tefillah, and the Closeness of Hashem

Transcript

This Torah class is brought to you by TorahAnytime.com. Last week, we began to discuss, to talk about Purim in reference to Yom Kippur. There's a connection. We mentioned that it's already brought down in the Zohar, that the Gaon speaks about it, the Shlah, and all the sefarim after discussed to explain the parallel, Yom Kippur and Purim. And we began discussing, and we said that we would start last week and continue this week. Last week we spoke that Purim, as we brought from many Rishonim, many Mekoros, is a Yom Tefillah, and Yom Kippur is also a Yom Tefillah. And we explained that that's one of the parallels between Yom Kippur and Purim. They're both days designated for tefillah. It's interesting, the Shaarei Teshuvah, Hilchos Hoshanah Rabbah, in the first seif katan in Hoshanah Rabbah, he brings from the Eliyah Rabbah, he brings from the Maharil, Vayashkem Avraham baboker, hei ashkamos. There are five days during the year which you're supposed to wake up early, come to shul early to daven. Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Choshanah Rabbah, Purim, and Tisha B'Av. Purim is echad mehei hashkamos. That's what he brings. These are all days of tefillah. It's interesting that the Mishnah Berurah himself is meramez it in Hilchos Tisha B'Av. Doesn't quote this Eliyah Rabbah, but he says that the minhag is lehakdim, to wake up early Tisha B'Av in the morning to come to shul. So either he was speaking stam the minhag, but where did the minhag come from? L'choira it's this Eliyah Rabbah, that you're supposed to wake up early to daven. Tisha B'Av is a Yom Tefillah. We'll discuss that as we get closer to Tisha B'Av, and hopefully we won't need to discuss. But Purim is a Yom Tefillah, like Choshanah Rabbah, like Yom Kippur, Rosh Hashanah. And that's the connection we spoke between Yom Kippur and Purim. We also discussed how Yom Kippur is a day of achdus, it's a day where Yidden unite. It's me'avodas hayom, and Purim is the same. K'de'mevuar, like everyone already knows, it's spoken about in all the sefarim. But last week we added a point to this, and we said that it's interesting that Esther never asked that they should daven. Esther's request is, Lech knos es kol haYehudim asher b'Shushan v'tzumu alai, v'al tochlu v'al tishtu yomam va... Haba davni, leich knos es kol haYehudim, pak davni. It doesn't say one word about davening, with tzumu. So pashtus, tzom goes together with tefillah. Last week we tried to bring out a point that actually it was in the leich knos. Merumaz in the leich knos is the inyan of the tefillah, as we brought from the Magen Avraham, that the Magen Avraham brings that before davening you're supposed to be mekayem, and mekabel on yourself, v'ahavta l'reacha kamocha, because the yesod of tefillah is to be me'ached Klal Yisrael. So in the words leich knos, ligt already the yesod of tefillah. So was the actus for the sake of the tefillah, and maybe even the tefillah was for the sake of the actus. That's kem klaren. But either way, it's merumaz in the word knos. That's all you see, knos. It doesn't say anything about davening. And we added, l'choira, this is meduyak, that Esther does not ask them to daven for themselves. L'choira, they went in...

So it should have said, Leich knos es kol haYehudim, v'tzumu. They should fast, they should daven, they should ask the Ribono Shel Olam that they should have a yeshuah. The pasuk is meduyak. It's clear in the pasuk, v'tzumu alai, v'al tochlu v'al tishtu. And we said the pshat is because kol hamevakesh ba'ad chaveiro v'hu tzarich lo, sedavar, then a techilah. So she understood the achdus and the koach of the tefillah that comes from achdus is that one should daven for the other. So Esther was saying, I will go in for you, and you, tzumu, and you daven and fast for me. Tzumu alai. And together we're mekabel, we're mekayem the inyan of tefillah for Klal Yisrael, one for the other, which produces a tefillah of ganz Klal Yisrael. Zeidus zicheina livrachah, the beis Aharon, the Alter zeides said a meiredige vort. If you notice, Esther, what does she say? She says, tachashveireish, after she begs him to retract the gezeirah, and she says, Nafshi b'she'eilasi, v'ami b'bakashasi. What's the double lashon? What's the shinui halashon? Why is it nafshi she'eilah? Ami bevakashasi. So, tells us the meiredik, mamash meiredik. Dovid HaMelech also used this double language: Achashualti meis Hashem, ois avakeish, and all the meforshim talk. Al redn, what's the double loshon? Sha'alti, achashualti, ois avakeish. So the Zohar explains pshat: Sha'alti is I ask. I get it, fine. I don't get it, I turn away. Tried. I tried. Tried. I gave it a shot. Sheilosi, I asked. Achashualti, but it's not enough, says Dovid HaMelech. Ois avakeish, bikush means in tevakshenu, I keep on searching till I get it. Teirah is not enough that a person sits down and he says, Okay, I try to learn the Tosafos. No, no, no, you got to keep on trying till avakeish, till tevakshenu, till you get it. So, Esther, nafshi, for me, sheilosi. I ask. I don't get it. Ami. But for Klal Yisrael, ami bevakashasi, that I'm not going to stop till I get it. Esther goes in and asks, and her bakasha—don't forget, the same she'eilah and bakasha was to the melech, to the Eibishter. We all know throughout the Megillah. And whenever it says HaMelech first, the Eibishter as well. So a lot of the dialogue, it seems to be tachashveirus, but actually it's to the Ribono Shel Olam. So she's telling the Eibishter, Nafshi b'she'eilasi, uve'vakashasi. And that is tefillah. Ulevakesh me'et chaveirei. Levakesh. It's not enough just to daven; levakesh. And this is what we spoke last week, more or less, a little hosafah, is the inyan of Purim k'Yom Kippur, the inyan of Yom Tefillah and Yom Achdus in tefillah. There's another nekudah I would like to add, the parallel between Yom Kippur and Purim. There's a beautiful Reb Yerucham. Reb Yerucham speaks about the inyan of korban in relevance to tefillah. Zogt Reb Yerucham that korban is, as the Ramban explains, hiskarvus, being close to the Eibishter. Says Reb Yerucham, yet the Gemara tells us, Gadolah tefillah yoser meha...

Tefillah is greater than the korbanos. It's more in brachos, back to Chaf-Bais. Says Reb Yerucham, in what aspect is gedolah tefillah? In what aspect is tefillah greater than korbanos? Says Reb Yerucham, in this Ramban of hiskarvus, the korban is hiskarvus; tefillah is even a greater hiskarvus. It's even more of an essence of kirvah to the Eibishter. And he says, pele. He says it's a peledike thing if we would only understand the pshat, devarim she'omdim b'rumo shel olam. It's great, tefillah, the kesher that we could have with the Ribono Shel Olam. I'd like to show you how Purim is not only about tefillah, as we spoke last week, but which aspect of the tefillah? The hiskarvus, the closeness that one achieves through tefillah to the Ribono Shel Olam. I want to quote you a Rambam, rabosai. The Rambam, in the Sefer HaMitzvos, Sefer HaMitzvos HaKatzar, at the end of Mitzvos aseh, he discusses how the Ramban added certain mitzvos, and one of them is kriyas haMegillah. Says the Rambam, in hakdamah to Yad HaChazakah, v'eilu amru kein. Hayu meisifin al haTorah, and add to the Torah, says the Rambam that the derech of the way the Neviim added, for example, Mikra Megillah, that's not called adding. Shaneviim im beis din tiknu v'tzivu likros haMegillah b'ha'inasa, l'hazkir shvachov shel HaKadosh Baruch Hu. Remember last week we mentioned that Hallel is actually in the Megillah; the Megillah is a form of Hallel. That's l'hazkir shvachov shel HaKadosh Baruch Hu. U'tshuah she'asa lanu, v'haya karov lishavoseinu. And that He was close to our cry. Our tefillah, a cry of tefillah, is called a shavah, k'dei levarechoi l'halloi. But there's more: k'dei l'hodia l'doros habaim she'emes ma shehiftachtanu baTorah, u'mi goy gadol asher lo Elokim karovim eilav. What does it mean, karov lishavoseinu? What does that mean, karov? That the Ribono Shel Olam is close to our cry. Mi goy gadol asher lo Elokim karovim eilav, b'chol koreinu. I thought of something interesting, rabosai. Esther. We know it's Mizmor Shir layeles hashachar, and the mizmor is actually the words of Esther. Keili, Keili, lama azavtani, rachok mishu'asi divrei shagasi. You look at the Midrashim, you would notice that Esther's tefillah was a lot longer than that passage. Keili, Keili, lama azavtani, rachok mishu'asi. She davened b'pratei pratius, in detail, that the Ribono Shel Olam should remember Klal Yisrael, and that the Ribono Shel Olam should send the yeshuah to Klal Yisrael. Do you find that in Mizmor Shir layeles hashachar? The only thing we find is, Keili, Keili, lama azavtani, rachok mishu'asi divrei shagasi. What was bothering her?

What was bothering her is, and that's what the Rambam is being magdish, az der Ribono Shel Olam, where is the kiruv from the Shagasi when I cry out to You? There's a richuk. Keili, Keili, lamah azavtani? Why did You let me go? Why did You leave me? Sometimes it's not the result that we don't get that causes us to be in pain. Sometimes it's just the fact that we find the Eibishter rachok, and that we don't think or feel or have a sense that the Ribono Shel Olam is listening. If you notice Yom Kippur, Yom Kippur is a day of tefillah, but we have many days of tefillah. What was special about Yom Kippur? Yom Kippur was the day that the Kohen Gadol, that represented Klal Yisroel, went lifnai u'lifnim. Kohen Gadol goes, and directly, and that's what we have the famous Gemara of Reish Lakish, Kol Hashem tzvakos, yoshev, ro'isi. You could see. Every time I read this Gemara, every time I learn this Gemara, I'm mishtoimem from it. It doesn't say he heard. What does it say? V'ra'isi. V'ra'isi, hakasri kel kaHashem, tzvakos yoshev. Lifnei. The connection is so strong, to the point that the Ribono Shel Olam turns Yishmael b'ni. It's a chibah, it's a connection. Let's take a look how Esther talks. In the pasuk it says, Vayehi bayom hashlishi vatilbash Esther malchus, vata'amod bachatzar beis hamelech hapnimis, nochach beis hamelech. V'hamelech yoshev al kisei malchuso b'veis hamalchus, nochach pesach habayis. The Rekeach says that we all know that the word hamelech means the Eibishter, so the whole pasuk is to be read like the Eibishter, that it's actually with the Ribono Shel Olam. What does the pasuk say? Vata'amod bachatzar beis hamelech hapnimis. Does it sound very familiar about Yom Kippur, where the Kohen goes into the Beis Hamelech pnimis? Nochach beis hamelech, v'hamelech yoshev. Vayehi hakasri kel yoshev. Being able to see, the bechinah of Esther, she said, Keili, Keili, lamah azavtani. And what happened? She was able to go and feel the kirvah of the way the Kohen Gadol felt when he went lifnai v'lifnim. Sefarim vet gebrakht that actually this is what she said when she said originally, Uvchein avo el hamelech asher lo kadas. Yom Kippur was the one day of the year that he was allowed to go in. Never ever was the Kohen Gadol ever allowed to go in. Uvchein, avo el hamelech asher lo kadas. And notice she did it, what? B'tzom. Yom Kippur is also tzom. Uvchein avo el hamelech asher lo kadas. The very famous Gaon, the Gaon says that the Kohen Gadol actually was allowed to go in to the Kodesh HaKodashim whenever he wanted. Al kol panim Aharon HaKohen was allowed. Zois yavo Aharon el hakodesh. There was a certain avodah if he...

He turned himself. He was able to go inside the Kodesh HaKodashim all year. V'chein, avoy el hamelech asher lo chadas, asher avadti avadti. Purim is a time of hiskarvus, that the Yid is able to feel that the Ribono Shel Olam is with him. We've discussed this at great length many times before. Chanukah. What did they achieve in Chanukah? They achieved that they went back to the Beis Hamikdash, and that the Ribono Shel Olam showed them chavivus. What type of chavivus? He showed them chavivus that the Shechinah shruyah b'Yisrael. He showed them chavivus, the menorah. Purim, they also wanted the Beis Hamikdash. Shteit doch klar that that was the whole discussion, ad chatzi hamalchus, not to give them the Beis Hamikdash. Mordechai was yoshev b'shaar hamelech. The meforshim say, why was he yoshev b'shaar hamelech? Any opportunity he had to speak to the melech to convince him to let them rebuild the Beis Hamikdash. Yet what happened? They didn't get the Beis Hamikdash. What was the limud? The limud is that not necessarily do you need the Beis Hamikdash, v'hashraas haShechinah. A person is able to connect to the Ribono Shel Olam wherever he is. That hiskarvus, that closeness. V'doile tefillah loysa makarbonos. Chanukah wasn't meyuchad for yom tefillah. They were those tremendous, they davened and the Ribono Shel Olam listened to them. They came back, they had the avodah. Purim, you know what they had? V'doile tefillah yoser makarbonos. L'hodia that the Ribono Shel Olam, divrei hatzomos, is hakasah. The Ribono Shel Olam is nant, korban with the Yid, even without the avodah, it's Beis Hamikdash. And that's what I explained to you: LaYehudim haysa orah v'simchah v'sasson vyikar. What is all this? Tefillah, milah, is all the kesher that a Yid has with the Ribono Shel Olam. LaYehudim haysa orah, Torah, simchah, sasson, yikar. Shtei tachshei Shanes Yaakov, tzalu v'samecha, biroisam yachad, techeles Mordechai, all the sefarim speak. That was so special that they saw the techilas Mordechai. So there's a vort from Belzer Rebbe, sheinah vad. They didn't know who was on the horse and who was pulling the horse. Everyone made a mistake. They thought someone's on the horse. It's got to be Haman, and who's schlepping the horse? It's got to be Mordechai. But then when they saw techilas Mordechai, that the one on the horse is having a tachtach tzitzis, nitztam tzitzis, chazon ish, nefesh hatechilah... no, no, techilas Mordechai, hakol panim. So then they were happy. V'ra'osam yachad, techilas Mordechai. The sefarim have gebracht that techilas is the connection that a Yid has in this world with the Eibishter. It's one of the signs of the connection. So v'ra'osam yachad, techilas Mordechai, that they're connected to the Eibishter, that itself was a tremendous simcha. That was a tremendous simcha. I was thinking, efshar, rabosai, efshar, fregt gebracht in all the sefarim that Purim is about the pnimiyus. Purim is about the pnimiyus.

Between the wine, Mishenichnas Adar marbin b'simcha. What chelek of the pnimiyus are we looking for? And efshar, dos is the pshat, rabosai. A korban is an external thing. What chelek of the korban is the pnim? That's the avodah shebalev. The tefillah is gedolah min hakorbanos, because korbanos is the external, while tefillah is the what? No? Avodah shebalev. It's the internal. It's the bilvavi mishkan evneh. It is the mishkan. It is the Beis HaMikdash. But it's the pnim. Chanukah we came and we had, we had avodas Beis HaMikdash. Purim, we didn't get avodas Beis HaMikdash. But what did we get? We got the ma'oir, the avodas pnim, avodah shebalev, tefillah, l'hodi'a l'doros, HaKadosh Baruch Hu karev. Want I a meiredikkeit. I guarantee you, you'll have meiredik hana'ah, meiredik. Nu, you ready? Meiredik. This week's parsha, we just read, a korban olah. Adam ki yakriv mikem korban laShem. Where do you makriv the olah? Shteit the klal, al keren hamizbeach tzefoino lifnei Hashem. Tzefoino lifnei Hashem. And we're on the keren, the corner of the mizbeach. The Medrash says, Me'ira l'ani alai, shamayim va'aretz. Kol ha'omer, whoever says, Tzefoino lifnei Hashem, ezkor akeidas Yitzchok. I'll remember akeidas Yitzchok. It's a segulah to remind the Ribono Shel Olam, akeidas Yitzchok. And it's interesting, the Medrash says, Bein Yisroel bein goy. Even if a goy would say it. Zeh shteit in the Medrash. Even if a goy would say those words, Tzefoino lifnei Hashem, I'll remember akeidas Yitzchok. It's pashut, because it's an oilah. So why is that part of the pasuk, the reminder, Tzefoino lifnei Hashem? It should say, Adam ki yakriv mikem korban. We want the oilos to begin at the beginning of the pasuk. Hera pshat, rabosai, vos mir dacht zich es emes la'amito. Here nasi a kashe, a meredike kashe, Tzefoino lifnei Hashem. People don't realize. It's a meredike segulah. Just say, Tzefoino lifnei Hashem, v'shachat oso, Tzefoino lifnei Hashem. Un the teretz is, what is the yesod of a korban? The sefarim will speak: Adam ki yakriv, mikem korban. Adam ki yakriv, mikem korban. It's from you. And it's the adam. The korban is just the maiseh. But what's the real korban? The penim. It's the man shalem. I have a shaylah. What was Akedas Yitzchak? Did it ever happen? Never happened. Akedas Yitzchak never happened. So which part of the Akedah is the zechus korban that we have? And the teretz is, the ratzon, the fact that Avraham wanted to do it. Avraham wanted. It was the ratzon. What is tzafona lifnei Hashem? Tzafona, says the Chidushei Harim, tzafun, matzpun, what's hidden. It's what was hidden inside the person, the ratzon, the cheshek, the wanting. That's the korban tzafun. That's what it means, kol ha'omer, whoever says...

Oyno, lifnei Hashem, he has the karbon, because the yesod of the karbon was sofen. It's the ratzon to be makriv the karbon, and now I'm going to tell you about a real diska, which is half a fella. The Maril Diskin is mechadesh: why do we bring a karbon olah keren? Why takke olos on the corner? So he says, a chiddush nifla. He says when the Ribbono Shel Olam told Avraham Avinu to be makriv Yitzchak, he bound him on top of the mizbeach proper. And then when the Eibishter said, Go be makriv the ayil, he didn't want to take Yitzchak off the mizbeach. He kept him bound on the mizbeach. Why? Maybe the Eibishter will change His mind, and I'll be able to be makriv my son. So he kept Yitzchak on the mizbeach. So the karbon olah, the first karbon olah, the ayil was what? Al keren, on the mizbeach. And that's tzfoino. The karbon was tzfoino lifnei Hashem. I'll tell you what Chazal rabbeisay. The Medrash Tanchuma says, the Medrash Tanchuma says that Bilam played down the avodas korbanos of Klal Yisroel. He says, Ribbono Shel Olam, a karbon? What, you didn't bring two korbanos a day? I'll bring a thousand. That's pshat in the pasuk, Hayarotzeh Hashem b'alfei eilim. The Eibishter was telling Bilam, you think I need a thousand olios? Who needs a thousand olios? But he says more, says the Medrash. Bilam says, Avraham was makriv his son; I'll be makriv my son and my daughter. See what sinas Yisroel gives light to what the chachmei ha'olam say: at the moment that the Arabs start loving their children more than they hate Klal Yisroel, we'll be in good shape. He's ready to be makriv, just to outdo Avraham Avinu. ... What do you think, I need your korbanos? ... I don't need it. I can ask Gavriel, I can ask Michael, I can ask malachim to go be makriv korbanos if I needed korbanos. What do I need? ... I need Klal Yisroel to bring korbanos. What was the shakla v'tarya? And the teretz is, Rabbeisai, the shakla v'tarya is gargeshmak. Hear, Rabbeisai. It's not the maaseh of the korban. If it's the maaseh of the korban, the Ribbono Shel Olam says I can have a malach do it. But if I need korbanos, let malachim do it. ... I need adam, ki yakriv, with the heart, the hargashah. That's the Ribbono Shel Olam's looking for, something completely different than a korban. This you can't give me. And with this I think we can answer a ... tachzama real disc can ask it. Adam ki yakriv mikem korban. Bnei Yisrael. What do you mean? Goyim don't bring korbanos; they bring korbanos. A goy is allowed to be makriv a olah. If a goy brings an olah, we take it. So how come it says, Daber bnei Yisrael, ki li, it's only a ... klal Yisrael? And the Torah says, Rabbeisai, loi tunze reid, nu, zog! Avadeh they can bring a ma'aseh korban. Bilameicha givald bring korbanos. But the adam ki yakriv mikem — that's only daber bnei Yisrael. That's only daber bnei Yisrael. Only a Yid can do that. But then, the Yerushalmi in Shekalim. The Yerushalmi in Shekalim says, Adam ki yakriv mikem — afilu mikem geirim, even a ger is included. Why should the ger be — why a ger can't bring a korban? I'm not chashuv. Mah d'chagoy meik bringen? A ger, to exclude them from the pasuk of them? No, yidalach. The chakamim ... The taiches is gevaldik. A goy doesn't bring adam ki yakriv mikem, because he doesn't have that pnim. He brings korbanos. Efshar ger ...

Dos ebige Rosha, der geshmak that a Yid has, he doesn't have it. So maybe it's the smait from other diakrim, mi ken daven bnei Yisroel. That's what the shaylah is. When the Torah says that when he becomes a ger, ... chadasha. That's pshat, ger kekatan shenolad dami, a naye mensch. Until naye mensch, says every Yid that has all the geshmak of a Yid. ... Adam ki yakriv mikem, karban laShem. The Yid is given a day of the year that he could drink and eat, un tanzen, ... What comes out? ... Vos kumt aroys? Es kumt aroys der geshmak. A Yidishe hergesh, a Yidishe taam, an achdus. ... Vos kumt aroys? Fun pnimiyus. Adam ki yakriv mikem. Yid has a koyach to bring out the inerveinig, the ... nisht. ... Just like to end with one thing. Karov l'shaveiseinu. What does a Yid look for? A Yid looks to have a kesher to Eibishter. I don't have time to be marich on it. But you see that one of the nekudos is karov, karov l'shaveinu. What is the word karov l'shaveinu? He's close to our call. So pashut, he hears it and he answers it. I was thinking, when I told some of you over here, Chanukah, I went to speak to the Rachmastrivka Rebbe. I heard so many beautiful things about him, the Heilige Rebbe, tzaddik. I went to speak to him. I went down to Brooklyn. Why did I go? A rav, as a rav, I hear so many things, so much tzaros. It was just overload. Hashem yishmereni, I was platzing. Every time I hear, you know, it's a ... a ... problem from the ... It's just, it becomes very burdensome, and it starts to take an effect. So the mechazek went to get chizuk. I went to get chizuk. I think it's go to a person that's experienced in listening. Now where does he go to get chizuk? Stam the Eibishter. Someone once asked my zeide, Velche Rebbe geist, which Rebbe do you go to? Zeide was a Litvisher, so he said, The same Rebbe your Rebbe goes to. Ribono Shel Olam. We all end up at the same, in the same. So I went to the mechazek. He should tell me divrei Hashem, what the Eibishter is mechazek him, I trickle it down. So I was talking to him, and I saw that he was getting emotionally taken in by the shaila. So I asked him, I said, you know, I feel very uncomfortable when you tell a person after hearing all his tzaros, you tell him, Rebbeishter vet helfen. Rebbeishter vet helfen. I don't know, it's... but what am I telling him? First of all, unless a bracha maybe. I asked this to the Rebbe, is it a bracha that you're saying to him? What exactly is it? I'm telling him he should have emunah, bitachon? That's the answer? Once heard, I think I mentioned it here, so those that are here for many years, sitting here by the shiurim, that the Baal Shem had a daughter called Udel. He loved her. Udel, he loved her. What did he love about her? Someone once came to the Baal Shem, and zchusked at the heart, so he has big problems. So the Baal Shem said, The Ribono Shel Olam vet helfen. Ribono Shel Olam vet helfen. So Udel gave a scream from the side room. She was in the house, I guess the Rebbe had his own private room. Tate, un ver vet im helfen? Piz der Ribono Shel Olam vet im helfen?

Help him too. Hashem didn't get angry at him. Hashem called ... just made it. ... Who's gonna? And what do you think the Ribono Shel Olam answered? The Ribono Shel Olam helped him. So let's clarify yeshiva shehakirah and chassidish maaseh. Vos meint that Ribono Shel Olam helped him? What does it mean? ... This you're not going to hear in the yeshivas, ... Vos iz der taich in the maaseh? Nu? The Ribono Shel Olam helped him. Vos meint dos? And the teretz is, what I think I heard from the Rebbe. The Rebbe turned to me and he said, ... ... ... The Ribono Shel Olam heard. Ribono Shel Olam's listening. The Ribono Shel Olam is there. He's there. I thought about it. And I thought, if you notice, we say in our tefillah, Shema koleinu, Hashem Elokeinu, chus v'rachem aleinu, v'kabel b'rachamim. We still never said one word about the Ribono Shel Olam responding and giving us what we asked for. Shema, listen. Kabel, accept. And then we say, u'milfanecha malkeinu reikam. Al tishiveinu. So I always understood it means Shema, give me the full yeshuah. And if that can't be, al tepanes. Yidis akmin — I think it's an English, but we could say yidis akmin, varf mir a bengel, throw me something. U'fanecha, malkeinu, reikam al tishiveinu. Then I started to think, maybe I think too much during davening. I could be. I have been mitten davening, is mir reingefallen in dem halach. Shema. First, the Ribbono Shel Olam is asking you to listen. Shema. I know that you're listening. Kabel. I know that you're accepting. It's not going nowhere. The tefillos are going somewhere. And then I ask, efshar, chutz m'da. U'milfanecha, malkeinu, reikam al tishiveinu. But the Shema, that itself is already an inyan. Hashem, the Ribbono Shel Olam, is not keili, keili, lama azavtani. It's not, dochok mishu'asi divrei shagasi. Yeah, it's not far. I'm all mishrait. Tell me, you ever notice when a person screams in the forest, what does he think? That the geshrei inishin are gonna help anyway. Why? Because the helicopter, a hundred miles away, is not gonna hear it. Rachok mishu'asi, divrei shagasi. You scream and all of a sudden you hear in the background, echo. You know, you're in trouble. That's rachok mishu, and that's ki karov, ki chov migoy gadol, asher lo Elokim krovim eilav. I'm going to share with you, and with this I'll end. When the Rebbe told it to me, it was a tremendous chizuk to me personally. And I realized maybe I didn't come because of all the tzaros I hear from ayanim. Maybe I came to get a little chizuk myself too. What was the chizuk? It's no secret, we went through difficult times the last two years, me and my family, not a secret. And I kept on mulling myself, what is the most difficult part of the nisayon? What is it? And the truth is, I made a list. It was a lot. And I couldn't picture—I'm sorry, I couldn't pinpoint one over the other. It was a lot. But every time I thought about it, one thing came to my head. And I don't know why, but this mashal came to my mind. I didn't know if I would ever share with people, but I...

Decided, you know what? I feel in this year it's the right thing to share. I want to give you an example, and this is, I thought to myself how I always felt. Whenever you have a kid on a school bus, what does the child feel? His parent is waiting by the bus stop. The parent is waiting by the bus stop to pick him up, so he's secure. What happens? He comes to the bus stop, he gets off the bus, and the father or the mother is not there. So what's the first thing that goes through the mind? I'm sure he was there, but I might have been a minute late, a minute early, but he went into a store to buy me a cookie. He went into the store to buy me a lollipop. That's what... So I don't get nervous right away, because I know that he's close by somewhere. Then if I get off the bus, and then I start looking in all the stores, and he's not there, then I start to wonder and get scared and alone. Even if they know that the Eibishter is in the school bus waiting for them, or he could be in the store, he could be doing something else for you different. But to think that the Paternita is not there is the scariest thing, and that's what she felt. Keili, Keili, lama azavtani. Purim is a time where we can be mispalel to the Eibishter to mechazek this kesher through tefillah, bring out the pnimiyus, the Yid, the connection of Yid to the Eibishter, vata'akazeches afcheilechem for me, and let the Ribono Shel Olam be there by the bus stop for you for many, many years to come. You've just experienced another Torah class, brought to you by TorahAnytime.com.